


Campaign 2: And the Insanity Continues

by keroseneinablender



Series: The Devil is a Role-Player [3]
Category: Hataraku Maou-Sama! | The Devil Is a Part-Timer!
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-04
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-05-11 20:12:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 50
Words: 53,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5640427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keroseneinablender/pseuds/keroseneinablender
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A continuation of the exploits of a certain group of tabletop role-players, covering the events of The Devil is a Part-Timer Volume 2.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm working out of the Yen Press English translation for this, and will be quoting lines liberally. Also, like with other works in this series, which characters is speaking is indicated by the colour of the text, so I recommend having works skins turned on when reading this fic.
> 
> Character Index:   
> Maou - Red  
> Ashiya - Murky yellow   
> Urushihara - Purple   
> Emi - Maroon  
> Chiho - Orange   
> Rika - Green   
> Suzuno - Blue  
> The GM - Black

So can we start? I’m eager to return to my exploits as Satan, king of all demons.

Aren’t we missing someone?

She sent me a text earlier, apparently school’s been really busy lately, so she won’t be able to show up very much for the next little while.

Well, it’s not like Rika is super important to the plot, anyway. I’m totally sure we’ll get on fine without her.

Yeah, I mean, she doesn’t even know jack about the plot. ...The character I mean.

So we can start now right?

Hang on a sec, I’m not quite done my character sheet for this yet!

You can finish it up while the others roleplay. Doesn’t look like it will take you too much longer.

It’s been two months since the battle in Sasazuka. Daily life for everyone has gone on, and summer is fast approaching.

This night is a special one, for tonight, Ashiya and I have gone out to eat!

Didn’t you forget someone there?

Did you have this planned in advance or did it just pop into your head? But, sure, you have gone out to eat. What kind of restaurant are you at? 

Yakiniku.

...The coals glow white-hot as they sear sizzling strips of meat, the oily drippings from the finely sliced pieces causing the fire to roar even stronger. The room is filled with the smell of flesh and bone charring.

I lick my lips as I look at the sight. A demonic smile emerges on my face.

“Heh-heh-heh... How does it feel, then? Being seared by the flames of hell without even a moment’s chance of escape?”

Are you really going to give an evil monologue to your dinner?

“Now I will consume you whole. Your meat, you entrails, your very bones! And you will provide the energy I need to fulfill my great mission!”

Apparently so.

“So just rest easy and let the life escape you...heh-heh-heh...”

“You Demonic Highness...”

“Ah, give me a moment. No need to hurry this. I’m not gonna be happy unless it’s charred to a crisp.”

“No, your Demonic Highness, I mean...”

“Now! Let the great feast begin! Let’s start with the organ meat, shall we?...But look at you! What is the meaning of this? Cowering in the corner like a scared child?!”

You wrote this speech out and just wanted an excuse to use it, didn’t you?

“There is no longer any escape for you! You shall have the honour of being the first sacrifice offered to my lordly presence!”

I bring the chopsticks in my right hand to the ready. They find their target, a well-cooked piece of beef on the grill. I ferry it to bowl of hot-and-spicy where I drown it before bringing it to my mouth.

“Heh-heh-heh... A delectable treat indeed!”

An evil look of self-satisfaction crosses my face.

“...My liege?”

“What, Ashiya?”

In a flash, my expression returns to normal.

“If I may, could I convince my Devil King to enjoy his meal a little more quietly? You’re going to disturb the other diners around us.”

I eyebrows are furrowed in apparent distress.

“Mm? Oh. Right. Guess I was getting too into this for my own good, huh? Sorry if I was too loud.”

I glance at my surroundings.

“Also, there’s no need to become so passionate about some organ meat at a yakiniku restaurant. You’re acting like this is the first decent meal you’ve had all year.”

“Well, I’m not trying to act like that, but if you’re like me and you live off junk food and scratch-’n’-dent groceries, it’s kinda natural to get excited about eating someplace fancy, you know?”

I transfer a selection of meat, organs and vegetable bits to my plate as I speak.

“I gotta be honest with you, I never really understood why all the other demons loved feasting on the organs of their victims up to now. This stuff’s really good! Like, what’s this bit? Veal heart or whatever? It’s so rich and melt-in-your-mouth yum. And I love how the pork belly and chicken cartilage crunch against my teeth! And what’s this stuff? Beef tripe? It looks pretty weird, but it’s not bad!”

“...I am glad, my liege.”

I nod, giving up on the idea of calming Maou anytime soon.

None of the nearby customers are demonstrating visible annoyance at Maou’s commentary.

How are we affording this anyway? And why are we here at all?

I just got my paycheck. And recent events have made it seem like a celebration is in order.

Plus, there’s a promotion on right now where you can get one free drink and 390-yen deals on most plates.

I sip on my free mug of oolong tea, then set my side salad in front of me.

“Your Demonic Highness, you need to eat some vegetables in addition to all that meat. These days, if wanted to eat this many vegetables at home, it would take far more than three hundred ninety yen.”

I attempt to transfer some of my salad into Maou’s bowl.

“Oh, yeah, I heard that produce was startin’ to get expensive.”

Uh, question, I thought you had plot ideas for this campaign, why are you letting them play around in a restaurant?

I’m stalling. That way I know what new character I have to work into the plot.

Thanks.

“It is madness, my liege. A head of cabbage had risen to three hundred fifty yen.”

“Well, it doesn’t really matter, does it? I’m pretty much a born carnivore anyway.”

“It ‘doesn’t matter’ only if you think a sound nutritional balance doesn’t matter. It would be nice if could at least cook some fish, but we don’t have a fish grill for the Devil’s Castle stove, and our puny ventilation fan would be no match for the smoke and stink we’d generate.”

“Oh, speaking of which, we better buy some dinner for Urushihara, right? I think they have takeout bento boxes here.”

Finally, you remember I’m living with you now.

I remembered that the whole time, it’s just we wouldn’t be taking you out to do dinner with us.

Why not?!

I scrunch up my face and shake my head at this proposal. I begin to sort through the remains of my salad.

“No need. We can just buy a regular-sized pork rice bowl at the Sugiya on the way.”

“Huh?”

I indignantly finish my salad.

“Urushihara’s starting to get into online shopping, if you haven’t noticed. He’s never worked a day of his life here, and yet he commandeers your credit card to fritter away our monthly budget. He never spends a great deal of money on each individual purchase, if we let it pass unmentioned, we’ll pay for it someday.”

What in the hell makes you think I’m the sort of person who would just spend money one whatever mildly helpful thing it was that caught my eye? ...Nevermind answered my own question there.

“Wha? He’s been buying stuff?”

“I noticed on the past month’s credit card bill that there were quite a few more purchases made besides the computer and Internet installation we bought. Unless it was one of us wasting our money, which I doubt, it had to be him.”

“...Oh. Yeah, you know, I kinda had the impression that laptop’s gotten a lot more decked out since I bought it... I kinda wanted to go easy on him. He can’t really go outside...”

Why?

You’re _wanted_ , remember.

“...And I don’t what him getting so stressed that he starts thinking about double-crossing me again. But if he’s going too far, I better read him the riot act, huh?”

“I earnestly hope you do, Your Demonic Highness. The iron hammer of justice needs to be struck, and quickly.”

The frown on my face starting loosen listening to your words.

“Okay, well, if we got some free money, then how ‘bout we splurge a little?”

“Ha?”

My chopsticks freeze in the air.

I already have the menu open.

“I kept this on the cheap side ‘cause I thought we’d need to save some money for Urushihara’s portion, but if not, how ‘bout we get one order of prime galbi, huh? What do you think? One prime galbi!”

I hang my head in resignation, and no I don’t need to know how much it actually costs.

“...Well, if you insist. But just today, and just this once! There will be no more ordering tonight.”

“Yesss!!”

I pump my fist in the air as I catch a nearby waiter, make my order and request the check.

I can’t decide if watching the king of all demons this excited about a single serving of spiced beef is heartwarming, or soul-crushingly pathetic.


	2. Chapter 2

As you leave the yakiniku restaurant, your lungs are instantly filled with humid air. It feels like cups of water have just been dumped down your windpipes.

“What the hell? It was cooler inside the restaurant! There were literally fires lit across the whole damn room!”

“We owe much to air-conditioning, my liege.”

After we buy the cheapest pork rice bowl at Sugiya, we fight our way through incoming traffic as they make their way towards the station entrance.

“These guys have to be crazy. It’s this friggin’ hot, and they still put on those full business suits like it’s nothing.”

“Well, a lot of those suits are made of much more breathable material these days. Even the discount chains like Akayama and Akaki are starting to sell them.”

“I know that, but how stupid do you have to be to want to wear long-sleeved shirts in the summer?”

“Your Demonic Highness, have you forgotten about out attack on the Desert Kingdom on the Southern Island?”

You come to a red light.

My face turns grim.

“The sun can cause terrible damage to one’s skin. Do you recall what the people of the desert wore? Their bodies were covered in thick fabric. Japan may not be the searing wasteland you saw in the Southern Island, but then, Earth is quite a different place from Ente Isla.”

“Wh-what’re you talking about?”

Where is this tangent coming from?

“Overexposure to the sun can lead to sunburn, my liege, and excessive sunburn can cause skin cancer. Aren’t you aware that the thinning ozone layer is exposing the cities of Japan to more and more ultraviolet rays every year?!”

“Uh, no? So what?”

I point a finger towards the sky.

“Even on cloudy days, or evenings like this when the sun isn’t out, those UV rays are still raining down upon us. They are the direct cause of skin cancer and cataracts, and in places like Australia that are closer to the Antarctic ozone hole, some states even require children to wear protective glasses as they travel to school. My point, Your Demonic Highness, is that even in the summertime, it is no longer strictly the wisest move to go around in short sleeves. If I could convince you to add a baseball tee and some sunglasses to your wardrobe, that would put me a great deal more at ease with regard to your long-term health.”

“Dude, baseball tees are one thing, but I’m _not_ going around wearing sunglasses. Hey, it’s green. Let’s go before that pork bowl gets cold on us.”

What was _that_?

We’re stalling for time aren’t we?

So you attempted a filibuster?

“Ah. Yes. By the way, Your Demonic Highness, did you know about that yakiniku restaurant in days past?”

“Hmm?”

“I know it’s not along your normal route to work, so I simply wondered how you can to be aware of it.” 

“Oh... Well, I’ve kind of gone there before, actually. And before you say anything, it was on someone else’s dime, okay? I didn’t use any of our money!”

“I would hardly be angry about that sort of thing.”

Bull- _crap_! This is the same character who is limiting mine to having a cheap pork bowl for dinner because of his online shopping habits.

“A-anyway, the first time I went - today’s the second time - Ms. Kisaki brought me over.”

“I see. A private employee party or some such, then? Come to think of it, I do recall you venturing by yourself eight months and seventeen days ago, stating that you didn’t need me to prepare dinner.”

“You know, the way you instantly recall dates like this is pretty damn scary.”

I knit my brows.

“Ms. Kisaki called it, like, a welcome party for me. She said she knew some people who worked at the place. It was me, her, and a few other folks, but she wound up paying the whole tab.”

“A grandly generous manager as always, I see. So this wasn’t your first time trying horumon-style yakiniku?”

“Welllll, I kinda didn’t wanna pig out the first time, since it was her treat and everything. To be honest, I don’t really remember exactly what I ate.”

With some of the things you say, it’s hard to remember some times that your character is actually a Devil King.

“Still...it’s not like I didn’t want it, but I’m not totally cool with how Ms. Kisaki sprung it on me.”

“It merely shows how much trust she’s placed in you, Your Demonic Highness. It hasn’t even been a year since she hired you. Quite the exceptional promotion, is it not?”

I shake my head in response.

“Yeah, maybe, but I’m still just as hourly as always.”

“Perhaps it is for restricted periods of time, my liege, and perhaps involving only a small number of people, but you are _ruling over_ human beings! Surely it is something to be commemorated!”

“You say that, but...do you really mean it?”

“I would hardly have taken you out to eat if I didn’t. What kind of servant would I be, my liege, if I did not celebrate your grand promotion?”

Since the two of you seem to have worked it out, would you mind enlightening me? What promotion?


	3. Chapter 3

“Shift supervisor? So, you mean...”

“Right. You’ll be assistant manager during you assigned hours, Maa. You’ll get a raise to cover the extra duties, too.”

I’m unable to hide the stock.

“To be honest with you, the franchise bosses are calling me put for managerial training. Which, frankly, is a huge pain in the ass for me, because it means I’m gonna have to be away from here during the late shift for about a week, starting next weekend. I know you haven’t even been here a year yet, Maa, but I think you’ve got some serious talent. I thought about calling for another full-timer to fill in for me, but if I’m going to leave this location in someone else’s hands for half the day, I’d rather leave it to someone I know’s up to the task instead of rolling the dice with some guy I’ve never even met. So what do you think? Can I count on you?”

“Yes! Absolutely! I’m not gonna let you down!”

Fulfilling my duty’s in the shift supervisor roll is one step closer to my goal of world domination! I snap up the offer.

Ms. Kisaki nods in response a warm smile on her face, before suddenly changing the topic.

“By the way, Maa, you know that those pricks at Sentucky Fried Chicken are opening up a new location next to the bookstore across the street, right?”

“Uh? Um, yeah.”

I blink at the unexpected gear shift.

The Sentucky Fried Chicken will be opening soon in the space next to the nearby bookstore, a whopping fifteen seconds’ walk away. They’ve already placed a huge advertisement in front of the under-renovation storefront.

“Well the grand opening’s the day my training begins. Hence, why it’s huge pain in the ass for me.”

Ms. Kisaki ruefully spits the words out.

I nod as I think this over.

“So here it is, Maa. If SFC attracts more total customers during the evening hours than we do, I’m docking your pay ten yen for every guest we’re beaten by.”

“Uh?”

“If you lose by ten people, one hundred yen! Lose by a hundred... one thousand yen. Right off your hourly wage!”

“Wha- Uh, I, uh, hang on a second!”

Ms. Kisaki is flashing a razor-shape smile that would make eve the Hero proud.

“Silence! That’s the kind of resolve a shift supervisor needs to survive in retail sales!”

“Yeah, but...I only make one thousand yen an hour! If you take one thousand yen off that, that’s basically working for nothing! There has to be something in the labour laws about that...”

“The only constitution that applies here is _me_!”

So Ms. Kisaki rules over the MgRonalds with an iron fist, does she?

“And you’d be glad to work for free, trust me. One of the guys I joined up with lost big to a competitor once. He wound up getting reassigned to Trinidad and Tobago. Last I heard, he’s still there. ‘At least they speak English,’ I remember him saying.”

“I don’t think that’s the problem...”

“Regardless! I officially name you our newest shift supervisor! For one week, I want you to stake your life protecting this place and destroying that new godforsaken new SFC location! Defeat means death!”

“N-no way...!”

Ms. Kisaki responds to you by crossing her arms and walking up to you.

“What are you trying to say, Maa? Are you saying you want to take all the trust and hope I have placed in you and toss it in the septic tank?”

I’m still unable to respond coherently.

“As your boss, I have an obligation to give you the stick sometimes. But every stick needs to have a carrot, too. If you respond to my trust in you and emerge victorious, I’ll make sure you’re generously rewarded for it. Depending on how things go with the daily customer and sales figures. I may consider a further raise. And if you can build more experience as a regular shift supervisor and assistant manager, I could even recommend you for a full-time position, too.”

“Yes, ma’am! I’ll do it! I promise I won’t let you down, Ms. Kisaki!!”

A look of supreme satisfaction spreads across her face.


	4. Chapter 4

“But how would she even know how many customers visit your rival?”

“She said the main office is sending observers over to keep tabs on foot traffic. We had a temp job like that once, too, remember? Like, not long after we first came here. They gave us that handheld counter thingy we had to click every time someone passed by us.”

“Ah, yes, that was the dead of summer as well, if I recall. Spending hours under the hot sun counting passerby was nothing short deadening, both physically and mentally. We had to bring our own drinks and shade as well.”

“So in the course of a week, she’s teaching me how to do the daily books, how to enter sales figures into the office computer, and how to run the attendance-management system. Then, next weekend, I’m betting my salary on this all-out war. It’s making me, like, crazy nervous.”

“Your Demonic Highness, now is no time to grow weak at the knees. Being granted such a substantial post is nothing short of a high honour. I, too, recall the intense pride I felt upon being named the supreme commander of the Eastern Island invasion force...!”

I have my hand on my chest, and am already striding across Ente Isla in my mind.

“Yes! Right! Anyway! There’s no weaseling my way out of this now regardless. My work schedule’s gonna stay the same, though, so hopefully you’ll be able to cook for me.”

Hopefully my efforts will have stopped you from going into I want to invade our homeland, stop, screwing around, Your Demonic Highness mode.

“Y-yes... Certainly, my liege.”

Okay, thanks for taking up time for me, I’ve got the character sheet ready.

Can I see?

Yeah, here you go.

Okay...yeah I can totally work with this. Soon the light from the Devil’s Castle grows visible in the distance. But something is different from how it should be. There are two lights.

“Hmm?”

“Hohh...” 

One of the lights is from the corner apartment upstairs. Room 201, the Devil’s Castle. The second light is from Room 202, the apartment next to yours.

We’re the only tenants aren’t we? So has the landlord returned?

No, but she was been sending you regular letters from her holidays.

How many, exactly?

About two or so per week.

I can totally see Maou opening the first one with reckless abandon, not realizing it’s contents.

Oh yeah, he totally would. Wonder what his rewards would be for doing that?

The letter contained a neatly worded chronicle about the joyous vacation she is enjoying on a private beach in Hawaii. And included in the envelope was a photograph of the landlord, lying on a deck chair underneath a beach umbrella, tropical cocktail in one hand, wearing a rainbow-coloured bikini and a devil-may-care wrap.

That sounds like a lot more of her skin than anyone would want to see.

The moment they set their eyes on the photo, Maou’s vision turned sheer white, Ashiya stumbled for the bathroom with one hand covering his mouth, and Urushihara fainted on the spot and ultimately required three full days to recover.

Why did I get the worst of it?

My guess would be because you haven’t had the steeling experience of actually seeing the landlord in person.

Just as the memory of the now infamous landlord cheesecake pinup massacre crosses your minds...

Landlord cheesecake pinup massacre? Now that is a _quote_.

... a truck carrying a container with a giraffe logo passes you by. You know this logo to belong to a well-known moving company.

“It would appear we have a new neighbour.”

“Yeah. Wish he coulda moved in some other time. I’m kinda gonna miss being the only tenants in that whole place.”

“Quite true. Hopefully it won’t be someone of low morals. The sort of person to play loud music at night or bring their garbage out on the wrong day.”

I shake my head. It’s striking me as ironic that you, a Great Demon General, are worrying about someone else’s morals.

“Ah, I’m not really worried about that sort of thing.” 

“No? Well, considering this apartment is dirt cheap and requiring no deposit or advance fees, what kind of people would you expect to move in...? Besides, when we came here, we were homeless, jobless and dare I say _quite_ suspicious.”

I shake my head once more at your concerns.

“Maybe we weren’t exactly model tenants, but think about it. Remember what kind of... _lady_ is renting this place to us, Ashiya?”

The mention of the word lady sends to memory of that ghastly photograph grating across by brain.

“I, er... I imagine anyone moving in under our landlord’s auspices would never seek to get on her bad side, no.”

“That’s not what I mean, but... Ah, well. What happens, happens. Let’s get moving. I don’t want Urushihara whining at us.”

As you place your foot on the first step of the apartment stairs, something catches your eye.

“...Huh?”

The figure is standing in front of the fluorescent light over the second-floor corridor and is peering down at you below. The angle makes it impossible to tell for sure, but the small size and delicately curved body suggest it is a woman.

“Uh...”

I freeze in place.

The figure at the top of the stairs does likewise. The figure moves to go downstairs. ...2.

You slip on the first step.

“Ah...”

“Ah!”

“Ahh!”

The woman’s body is flying through space.

“No way...!!”

I instinctively extend a hand.

The the figure is falling wildly, limbs flailing towards you.

“My liege!”

The woman collides with you.

“Whoa, that was close...”

I’m tensed up, eyes open. Apparently, I’m in a state of shock after what happened. I’m wearing a Japanese kimono, a long cooking apron and a triangular head scarf. My shoes seem to have slipped off, but I’m still wearing my tabi.

“Uh..umm..”

I try to find something to say to this woman.

Really I look more like a girl. And I’m staring listlessly into space.

“Danger comes when one least expects it...!”

With this, I close my eyes and go limp.

“Well, uh, yeah, but that’s not the problem here...”

I’m now unconscious and am thus unable to respond.

“Are you...all right?”

I run up to you, carrying one of the girl’s sandals.

“You talking about me, or this girl? So this girl fell from the stairs, and I caught her, and... _now_ what?”

Well you’re the players, it’s really up to you.

I try to wake her up by shaking her.

It doesn’t work.

I try slapping her cheek.

It doesn’t work either.

I carry her back upstairs...16... and into Room 202. Hopefully this is the apartment she is moving in to.

I follow, 12.

The room is packed to the gills with new, unmarked cardboard boxes. There is also a polished wooden clothes chest and an open-air brazier.

I lay the girl down on the floor, resolving to check in on her in an hour and call an ambulance if she’s still unconscious.


	5. Chapter 5

“You’re late! I’m hungry!”

I literally just opened the front door.

“We came as fast as we could. You could at least say ‘Welcome home, master’ or something.”

I bump into you while taking my shoes off in the cramped foyer.

“Here, Lucifer. Got a souvenir for you.”

I offer you the bag with the bento dinner inside.

I snap up the bag.

“Hey, I thought you guys went to a yakiniku place. Why’d you get me a Sugiya pork bowl?”

“Oh, uh, sorry, Urushihara. Ask him to give the financial rundown.”

I point a finger towards Ashiya.

“You could point the finger at yourself, I would say. Your extravagant spending habits as of late are too much for me to tolerate.”

I glare at you.

“Yeah, but...dude, this is kinda a huge difference, isn’t it? I mean, come on...”

I remove the plastic bag and pork bowl cover before tossing them to the side.

“Lucifer! Don’t spread your garbage around the room. Clean it up!”

I angrily pick up the paper wipe that fell out of the bag.

I put the pork bowl in the microwave.

How do you angrily pick something up?

I picked it up while angry.

“Also, would you mind cleaning the area around your computer already? All these chip bags and empty juice cans... It’s going to be a bug magnet in the summertime!”

I look expectantly at the microwave.

“I’m hungry, okay? If you’re gonna yell at me, do it when I’m done.”

I break in with a concerned look on my face.

“So, did you find anything useful today?”

What?

You’re researching ways to get my magic back.

Oh, yeah, right.

“I’m not gonna hit pay dirt that easily. You _know_ that.”

I return to my computer desk, pork bowl in hand.

“That’s all you’ve said to me for the past two months, man!”

“Well, what do you want from me? I’m not gonna go on some webpage and find secrets to all the magic in this world, just like that. I mean, look, Maou...”

You’re calling him Maou?

Yeah, _so_?

There is no way Alciel would take that sitting down. He would insist you refer to his majesty as His Demonic Highness.

And you _really_ think I’d listen.

No, which would lead to arguments.

You plan on starting one now or something?

No, I'm just warning you that they're going to occur sooner or later.

“Do you think that a computer and the Net are, like, some kind of magical potion that’ll solve all your problems?”

I groan in frustration.

I very deliberately sigh.

“Heh. Well, look, dude, the Net isn’t a miracle machine, okay? Also, maybe you didn’t notice, but the government’s starting to give out jail time these days if you start screwing around online too much. You want the cops putting their eyes on us any more than they are now?”

“And you call yourself a demon?”

“And _you_ call yourself Devil King, Maou?”

I remain silent, now lacking the energy to intervene.

Looking petulant, I begin picking up the garbage strewn across my desk.

“Like, let’s say everything works out and you really did find some museum exhibit that could be link us to demonic force. Do you really think we’d just rappel down the wall and steal it like we’re in some Hollywood film?”

“I don’t know what you’re getting at with that example...but, like, maybe you could reprogram the surveillance cameras, or hack out the code to the museum storehouse, or something. Can’t you?”

“Pfft. You sound like some kid who’s watched too much TV. And we don’t even _have_ TV in here.”

Which makes me ask, what _is_ your justification for having your character say this?

“I mean, sure, hacking lets you read and mess around with data on whatever computer you gain access to. But you can’t just hack right into a museum’s entire administration system. And you definitely can’t do it with this ancient relic. Take a look at this.”

“Huh?”

There’s a black-and-white video playing on one end of the computer screen.

I look on, but I’m unsure of what I’m supposed to be looking at.

There’s a car passing by the camera, stuttering forward at an extremely slow frame rate. At the same time you hear a car engine outside the apartment window.

“...Whoa. What’s that?”

“I got an old webcam and made it into a surveillance camera. See?”

I point out the window towards a ball-shaped object perched atop the iron grating. A cord is snaking out of the device to my computer.

“I bought it ‘cause I figured it’d tell us if anyone suspicious was nearby, but...I mean, it’s black-and-white and this thing still can’t keep up with the frame rate. You see what I mean? It’s useless.”

“I don’t appreciate how you expect me to know that intuitively... but that’s actually pretty useful for a change, isn’t it? If you have it set up outside, does that mean it can hold up against the weather?”

“Nah. It’s old and not waterproof, so I’d have to bring it back in when it rains.”

“...Wow. Never mind, then.”

I step away from the desk.

“Like, look at it this way. Any target I’d be ‘hacking’ into would be running on multiple supercomputer-class servers, each loaded with the latest in firewalls and security patches. Meanwhile, I’ve got a PC with a hard drive under one hundred gigs, a Pentium III processor, and only one USB port. It can barely run all the crapware that’s bundled with it. How am I supposed to compete?”

“Dude, speak Japanese.”

How did you get away with giving your character computer skills _this_ good anyway?

I had him devote a ton of time to learning computers. Plus I had make a few compromises regarding Lucifer’s human form.

Like?

He’s allergic to cats now, for one.

How’s that even relevant to what is happening in this campaign at all?

I point a finger back at my PC.

“And more to the point, if I leave this old computer running at day in this heat, it’s gonna catch fire sooner or later. I ain’t gonna be doing much of anything for a while.”

I remain quiet. I understood that at least.

I take a paper fan out of the advertisements for a neighbourhood pachinko parlour and begin fanning myself with it.

“Hey, by the way, what was all that clattering outside?”

I exchange a glance with Ashiya.

“You’ve been here the whole time and you didn’t notice?”

I point to the wall we share with the adjacent apartment.

“Someone moved in next door.”

I look at the wall is I nibble on some pickled ginger which was included with my meal.

“Huhh?! Are you kidding me? Who would actually _move into_ this pile of crap?”

Well there really isn’t a clearer demonstration of how useless that surveillance camera is, not to mention the person controlling it.

“You had to have heard something from the other room. There was a moving truck here and everything. Plus, the corridor window is wide-open. Didn’t you notice the moving guys or anyone?”

I shake my head.

“Nope. Sure didn’t.”

“You were browsing videos and listening to music or whatever, weren’t you?”

I try to frown as disapprovingly as possible.

I shake my head again and continue tucking in to my pork and rice.

“No, really, I totally didn’t notice.”

“Quit talking with your mouth full! You’re spraying bits of rice all over the place! And throw away that pointless surveillance camera at once!”

I was wondering when you were going to comment on that. It didn’t seem like the sort of thing Ashiya would let slide.

“No way, dude! It cost me five thousand yen with the software!”

The shock of this price quote causes my hand to slip as I try to tie the garbage bag closed, causing me to rip it open at the top.

I bring my hand to my forehead and stare listlessly at the floor.

“So did you run into whoever moved in yet?”

I shrug at your question.

“Well...we met, I guess.”

If you can call her falling on me ‘meeting’ her.

“The girl must have a hell of a lot of stuff, too. The room was floor-to-ceiling boxes.”

“I’m not gonna ask you to stay out of sight since she’s right next to us anyway, but try not to get involved with her as much as possible, all right?”

I finally loose my patience and land a sledgehammer blow on Lucifer’s head.

The blow causes my eyes to tear up, but I finish my dinner anyway.

“Huh. So she’s young? Must be pretty effed in the head to move someplace like this.”

I sit up and toss the paper container into the garbage bag.

“How many times have I told you?! You need to wash out containers like that before throwing them away! I’ve said it a thousand times, if you don’t clean them out, they’ll stink up the place until next garbage day!”

I’m clearly peeved, but I follow your orders and wash out the container before putting it in the garbage.

I yell at you again for not separating the garbage the way local authorities demanded.

I’m less receptive to that advice.

“Ah, screw that. C’mon, let’s go to the bathhouse! It’s dark now!”

What?

I’m assuming you’re not just going to have me sitting in the apartment all the time, growing progressively ranker.

And you mentioned at was dark _because_?

That way the fact that I’m wanted by the police is less of an issue, because I can hide my face.

“Ughh... Give me a sec. I’ll be ready once I brush my teeth. Can you get the ticket book out for me?”

I bark orders at you as I reach for my toothbrush.

A woman’s voice calls from the hall.

“Sirs!”


	6. Chapter 6

We all stare at each other.

The doorbell rings a single time.

“Wh-what do we do?!”

I’m stricken with panic.

“You’re the man of the house, Your Demonic Highness.”

“It says _Maou_ on the card, right? Get your ass out there.”

I glare at my two humble servants, before gathering my breath and replying to the visitor outside.

“I-I’ll be right there!”

I open the door.

“I apologize for intruding so late at night. My name is Suzuno Kamazuki, and I moved into the room next door earlier today.”

There is a large cardboard box in front of the door, apparently introducing itself to you. It reads UDON NOODLES - RESTAURANT USE ONLY.

“Um.”

“If I may, about earlier... I must humbly apologize for my abject rudeness upon our first encounter, and for placing such an onerous burden upon you.”

The box seems to bow to you.

Okay, this is bugging me, why, in all seven hells _why_ , are you roleplaying a box?

“Oner...wha? No, uh, it really wasn’t anything big... Anyway, my name’s Sadao Maou. It’s good to meet you.”

I bow lightly to the industrial-sized package.

And why are _you_ going along with it?

Our campaigns’ve been weird lately.

“I thank you for your kindness. I hope you will accept this gift, a token of my appreciation for my esteemed neighbour.”

The box lurches forward, or to be more exact, is offered to you.

“Um...this is...?”

“I understand that an offering of noodles is the most appropriate and customary of greeting one’s new neighbours.”

I don’t think it meant in quite those quantities, though.

“Oh...uh, well, thanks for the kind gesture.”

I pick up the box.

It’s heavier than you expect.

“Erff!”

I almost drop the box on the spot. I grimace as I gingerly place the box at my feet.

“I do hope it proves to suit you palate. Please; there is no need for modesty. I come from an old farming family established long ago in the mountainous countryside. I’m afraid there is much I have yet to learn about city life, but I hope you will be kind enough to put the unfortunate events of before behind you, and provide whatever neighourly support you deign to offer.”

I lower my head into a deliberate, well-practiced bow.

“Uhmm. Ah, yeah, certainly. You, too.”

What does this girl look like anyway?

She’s a small young woman. Her eyes are large and the bridge of her nose is sharply defined. She has very pale skin and long shiny hair. The expression on her face is dignified and betraying a strong will lurking deep inside her.

Given her garb, mannerisms and language, I’m wondering if this character came to Sasazuka via a time machine.

“So you are... Sadao Maou?”

“Huh? Uh, yeah, but...”

I avert my eyes for a moment, before nodding once and looking back up at you.

“Is it true that you share your quarters with one Shiro Ashiya?”

“Buh?”

Without thinking, I turn my head behind me.

I approach the door, looking just as surprised as you are.

“Um, yes, I am Ashiya. Maou is, ah, an old friend of mine. We are sharing a room together.” 

“Enchanted to meet you. I am Kamazuki. I have heard much about the both of you.”

The area between my eyebrows wrinkles up as though I am baffled.

“I have yet to meet the landlord here in person. However, a person I believe to be the landlord posted me a letter through her real-estate agent. It read that her only tenant was Sadao Maou, living here with his friend.”

Of _course_ it was the landlord.

As I am saying this, I pull out a frilly envelope from under my kimono.

“She wrote the people residing here were kind and sensibly minded, and that I could trust in their aid if I ever came across any difficulty.”

Why isn’t the landlord taking responsibility for her new tenant, rather than pawning her off on us?

“Ah! There was a photograph included as well. I wanted to ask you, is this really our -”

I make an attempt to remove something from the envelope.

“No! No, don’t! You don’t have to take it out! I don’t need to see it! That’s her, all right! if you were going to ask whether the lady in that photo is actually human or not, then yep, that’s definitely our landlord!”

I stop you with all the force I can muster.

My eyes open a notch wider at your panic.

“Why are you so flustered, if I may ask? It is merely a woman in a colourful pair of glasses, relaxing in a half-submerged inner tube while-”

“Don’t describe it! Please!”

I’m spooked enough to scurry back into the apartment.

I reluctantly place the envelope back into my pocket.

I breath a sigh of relief.

“Uh. Right. But anyway, I’m working at the MgRonald nearby, but if anything comes up, you can usually find him in here, so...”

I gesture to Ashiya.

“I know it is not exactly inviting, all of us men in the same room, but please let me know if anything’s bothering you.”

My invitation booms out from inside the apartment.

“Ah...yes. Thank you in advance, then.”

“Oh, but keep in mind, that guy gets kind of carried away sometimes, so don’t be afraid to shoo him away if gets too annoying.”

Why does it seem like you’re trying to push her away?

Because the last time he showed kindness to a random stranger, it was your character. And she repaid him by trying to kill him.

He’s the _Devil King_. Of _course_ she would try to kill him.

“Oh, certainly not. I was not expecting such a warm reception, perhaps, but it gladdens me to have neighbours I can freely call upon. I look forward to learning all the many ins and outs of communal life from you.”

Again, did she get here via a time machine? Because she sure sounds like it.

I bow once more, turning me eyes to the floor you’re standing on before letting out a startled exhale.

“Is there another among you?”

“Huh?”

“Oh...I simply noticed, there was another, different-sized set of footwear. I apologize if you were entertaining another visitor.”

“No, um...”

Well hiding me from her is sure to make me look _real_ suspicious.

“We actually took on another roommate recently. But he’s, like, a total shut-in, so he shouldn’t bother you too much.”

“I’m not a shut-in ‘cause I _wanna_ be, dude! Hey, I’m Urushihara! Nice to see you, finally!”

I shout my greeting from across the apartment.

Do you care at all if the police find you?

“I see... And you as well.”

This makes my eyes dart around, as if I am agitated.

Not even her flying leap off the stairs fazed her this much. Why is she disturbed by the local unkempt freeloader?

This facial tick lasts only a moment, and I give a shallow bow to Urushihara.

“Well, I had best haunt your doorstep no longer. I bid a good evening to you. Farewell for now!”

I turn on my heels and return to my room.

“A rather strange one, wasn’t she?”

“I don’t think we’re in any position to toss _that_ word around. But, hey, it’s nice to have some generous neighbours, huh? Just like that, we’ve got some extra food.”

Goodness knows, you’d never say no to free stuff.

I hoist the box of udon up to my waist.

“ _Man_ , this is heavy.”


	7. Chapter 7

The cardboard boxes are looming large over you living space, occupying an entire corner of the room by themselves.

Well I really can’t put them anywhere else. I turn on the AC to defend myself against the heat.

The from box on the packages contains the word _EMERALDA_ in extremely clumsy characters. _Food products_ is written in the contents section.

I take out my phone, and I call a number stored on it.

Who would you be calling? It's not like I gave any of your companions a phone.

It would make sense for Emi to send them one, if only as a means to focus their idea link conversations so they don’t end up intercepted, like what happened with Albert and Chiho.

Yeah, it would... So which of your companions did you want to call?

Emeralda, since she's the one that sent the package.

She picks up on the seventh ring.

“...Hellooooo! This is Emeralda Etuuuuva.”

“I know. This is Emi... I mean, Emilia speaking.”

“Indeed! Even after all this time, I still get nervous with the tellllephone.”

“You’ve had enough time to get used to it by now, haven’t you?”

I chuckle to myself.

“I haven’t spent that much time in Japan, soooo...”

I eye the tower of boxes.

“I just got some packages with your name on them... What _are_ they? It said on the packing slip that it’s food, but...”

“Oh, did they make it oooover? Wowwww, that was faaast! I only set them off yesterday!”

That _is_ fast, wish the actual mail service operated that quickly.

“They contain holy energy for youuuu! I modified its appearance so it wouldn’t look conspicuous storing it within Japan.”

“Holy... _What_? B-but why’s it say _food_ , then? They’re all, like, super heavy. Is it bags of rice or something?”

“Rice...? Oh, right, the main food staple in Japan? No, not thaaaat. I set it up so it’s divided into small portions that’re easy to work with! They’re famous on Earth, right? Liiiiike, one swig fills you up with power, yeah?”

“One swig?”

I take the packing tape off the topmost package. I toss it aside, open the box and peer inside. 

The box is packed with a wide variety of smaller boxes, with wadded up paper wedged between them. Each had the logo of a well-known Japanese pharmaceutical company stamped on it.

“Whoa...”

I open up one of the smaller boxes.

There’s eleven small brown bottles inside, each filled with a clear liquid and sealed at the top with a gold cap.

“‘5-Holy Energy B’...?”

“Oh, not a B. That’s a beta, y’knoooow? Like, kind of a beta test.”

“That’s not the point, Emeralda. So if I drink one of these, it’ll refill my holy power?”

“You’ve got it! By the way, Emiliaaaaaa... What’s the Devil King been up to laaaately?”

“Well...”

I think a moment before answering.

“The same as always, pretty much. We usually wind up arguing whenever we run into each other, but we’re both busy with work, so I haven’t really had the chance to gauge his private life.”

“Emiliaaa...do you understand what you’re telling meeee?”

“Huh?”

“You sound like someone whining that you’re so busy, you’re having trouble making time for your lovvvvver.”

“Dah...wha...nragh... What’re you _talking_ about, Emer?! You should _know_ it’s nothing like that between us! I-I mean, as long as we’re both living in Japan, we have to follow Japanese laws, go to Japanese work, make Japanese money, the whole bit! When I say I can’t watch over every waking moment he spends, it doesn’t _mean_ anything more than... Unnnghghh!!”

That really pissed you off didn’t it?

You _think_?!

“I know, I knowww...”

You can hear Emerald cracking up on the other end of the line.

“Stop making fun of me! I am the Hero of Ente Isla! And he’s the Devil King! He’s my sworn enemy, and that never changes! The mere thought that we’re lo...lo... _lovers_ makes me nauseous! Ugh... Look, I’ll admit I’ve been a bit lazy in monitoring him. I’ll go check him out tomorrow, all right? It’ll be a good chance to test out these bottles, besides. Too bad I can’t invoice you for the transport costs to _his_ place!”

“I don’t know what you meeean by that, but anyway, greaaat!”

“Emer?”

“So...pleeeease, Emiliaaaa? Pleeeease, don’t do anything that would me and you into ennnnemies, all riiight?”

Though I’ll go on record as GM saying I’d be totally fine of you did.

I swallow nervously.

“I know about ‘Emiiii’ and Japaaaan, and Maoooou, too. So pleeease...”

“I’ll take that to heart. Don’t worry. I am the Hero. On the name of my mother and father, I swear I will not follow the path of the mistaken.”

“Ah, how reassuring to hear thaaaat! Your moooother, you know... She was such a nice woman, Emilia!”

“It’d be a bit strange if an angel _wasn’t_ nice, wouldn’t it?”

What are you implying exactly?

That Lucifer doesn’t count.

“But how have things been over there? I know it’s weird how peaceful things are even though the Devil King’s still running free, but has anything changed with the Church and all the other nations at all?”

“Wellll... The plan to kill you off alongside the Devillllll King was led by only a tiny cabal of high Church officers. And in public, anyway, you and all of us are the heroes that saved the world! So no nation’s shown any outward signs, anyway, of sending assassins your waaay.”

“Outwardly, you say.”

“Indeed, veeery much so! But even if the main powers don’t make a mooove, there’s been quite a lot of suspicious actiiiivity from powerful nobles with deep Church connections, not to mention smaller nations and entities hoping to ingratiate themselves with the Chuuurch.”

“I wonder what I could’ve done to make those big shots hate me so much.”

“Oh, not like logic works against them. All they care about is protecting themselllves, and their iiinfluence. I’ve heard talk about someone enlisting the Assassin’s Guillld, and underground bounty hunterrrs, and even the Reconciliation Panel taking aaaction...but that’s still firmly in the realm of ruuuumours.”

“Panel of...what?”

I don’t recognize this term.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I mean the Council of Inquiiisitors. They changed their naaame recently.”

“What? The Inquisitors...? Then why would they be targeting me? It’s not like they’d bother going after the Devil King at the point, either. Why’s the rumour going around?”

“Probably because Olba hasn’t returned, I’d saaaay. It sounds like the missionary department is trying to find out what haaaappened to Olba, so it might be that some among them are aware of you, too, Emiliaaaa. Try not to let your guard down, all riiight? Some of them might try pushing things too quickly and start meddling with Japaaaan before long.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. So are you and Al all right?”

“Oh, they’ve got their eyyyes on us, what with all the stuff we pulled on ‘em. But nothing beyond that’s happened to us, noooo.”

“Guess there’s no rest for the Hero and her companions, huh?”

“Guess notttt. Aaanyway, I know talking for too long is gonna rack up your phone bill, so I better hang up, huhhh?”

“I’m not sure if it costs anything past the base fee or not, actually. It’s the idea link that’s actually connecting our two voices, after all. The phones are just an easier way to access it.”

“Welll, just in case, I won’t want you going broke on my account, sooo...”

“I appreciate the thought. Thanks for the holy magic, anyway. Say hi to Albert for me.”

I go to shut off the call.

Before you do, Emeralda interjects.

What did you forget to bring up?

“Ooh, wait, I forgot somethiiiing! Watch you don’t drink too many 5-Holy Energy Bs at once, okaaay?”

“Too much? Is there a limit or something?”

I turn the small bottle to look at the ingredients list.

It just reads: _Holy power_.

“There is! I mean, we can refill our own holy powers here as eaaasily as we breathe. But deliberately ingesting it like that? Well, it’s never been done beforrre.”

“Oh...”

“So that’s why its in beta, you seeee? We tested it on people heeeere, but let’s just say two bottles per day should be your max, all riiight? Drink one in the morning and one in the afternoon... Oh, but if you forget your morrrning dose, don’t try to make up for it by drinking it in one go.”

“...I wouldn’t mind asking a few questions about that, Emer, but anyway, I hear you.”

“Wonderfullll! Always stick to the proper dosage, okaaay? Bye for nowww!”

Emeralda ends the call.

I place the phone on my table.

“Where... _is_ she, anyway?”

She seems to have a really good handle on Japanese customs for someone who was only in Japan a few hours. I twist off the cap on bottle of 5-Holy Energy B.

You’re immediately greeted by the unnatural smell of syrupy cold medicine.

I hesitantly taste a few drops.

It tastes just like any old energy drink.

“Huh. Yeah, it’s just an energy shot, all right. Does this really work?”

I take my time emptying the bottle into my mouth.

The drink doesn’t seem to have any immediate effects.

I move to throw the bottle in the kitchen trash before spying a disheveled mass at the edge of my vision.

“Whoops...”

The packing tape I pried off the box is now sticking to my TV-listings magazine.

This _does_ have a point, right?

“Aahhhhhhhhh!”

I squeal in dismay as I run over to the magazine.

“They put _Vice-Shogun Mito_ on the cover, too...”

Ah, character development, okay.

Carefully I try to peel the tape off the image of my favourite samurai-drama star.

The adhesive remains stuck the cover, and your efforts rip it apart.

I look at the magazine I have in one hand, and the ball of ape I have in the other, before sighing.

“No, no, I can’t let this bring me down...!”

I rally my spirits and toss both the tape and the magazine into the trash.

“...I don’t have the energy to cook. Curry works, I guess.”

You know your character is alone, right? No one is hearing this.

She’s talking to herself. I plod into the kitchen and take out a block of instant curry and an instant rice packet. I toss the curry block on a plate and throw it into the microwave. I l let out a low, exhausted groan as I watch the curry cook.

“I... _am_ the Hero, right? Zapping a plate of expired curry for dinner doesn’t not make me the Hero, does it?”

The microwave replies with a beep.

I glare at it. I take out the curry and shove in the instant rice.

“That journey across Ente Isla would’ve been a lot easier with a microwave and some instant rice, though. Maybe I could take some kitchen appliances home with me, at least. I bet we could harness some lightening alchemy or something to power it with... Oh, wait would a Divine Thunder spell generate AC or DC power?”

I actually kind of want an answer to that question.

My expression loosens at the smell of the curry plate.

“Ooh, I’m almost out of shampoo. Better grab some soon...”

I think over my shower plans while glancing at my wall calendar.

“Is there anything good on TV yet? Oh, wait, _Vice-Shogun Mito_ airs tonight!”

The recent rise in moments spent talking to myself has so far escaped my notice.


	8. Chapter 8

I sigh as I stare at the passcard the machine spat out.

“At least Sasazuka and Hatagaya are within range of my commuter pass. Got that going for me, anyway.”

It kinda sounds like you life-or-death struggle struggle against the Devil King is being funded by the HR department at Dokodemo.

I put the receipt for my pass update in my pocket.

“Every single day, why’s it got to be so _hot_...?”

I’m blinded by the sun’s rays as I step out of the station onto the street. This heat is putting my resolve to monitor Maou at serious risk.

Why? You had to trek up and down the Southern Island’s tropical desert in order to defeat Malacoda. Japan in the summer at least makes it easy to get away from the heat.

Summer is still summer, and summer is hot. I take a floral-print umbrella out of my shoulder bag and open it up to keep the sun off. Then I set off towards the Devil’s Castle.

You’ve been following me for four days. If I was doing anything sinister, you would know by now.

“I’m...a total stalker right now, aren’t I?”

Well, that’s one way to put it.

I take drink from a small bottle of mineral water.

“Nngh! I need to be reasonable here! If the Devil King and his gang are just working, eating, and sleeping every day, then great!! Hooray for peace! ...And here I am, hanging around these guys, who are just trying to mind their own business. I’m _totally_ a stalker."

As the building which houses the Devil’s Castle comes into view, I check the bottle of 5-Holy Energy B in my shoulder bag. Just in case I actually end up needing it.

“Let’s just check up on things and get to work... The Devil King’s probably sleeping anyway, this early in the morning.”

I fold up my umbrella and put it back in my bag, to avoid being too conspicuous. I sneak into the grounds of Villa Rosa Sasazuka and look up at Room 201.

The windows of the Devil’s Castle are open again, thanks to the lack of air-conditioning. There’s a bunch of clothing and washcloths hanging haphazardly off the window frame, hopelessly wrinkled.

“They must’ve done laundry today. Nice job hanging all of it. Did they just throw it wherever it’d stay up, or what?"

I continue drinking until I empty my water bottle.

“...Well, nothing, I guess. I’m still a little early, but maybe I should head to work.”

“My goodness, can’t you handle the laundry with at least a modicum of gentleness? I had no idea you knew so little of housekeeping, Hanzo.”

You’re not letting me go that easily, I see.

Nope.

I instinctively flatten myself against the apartment’s outer wall to stay unnoticed.

“If you hang this in such a wrinkled state, it will lose its shape! And you’ll see the most ghastly of crinkles once it dries. You should at least be aware of _that_ much.”

I take out a hand mirror and extend it past the corner of the wall, to examine the upstairs corridor.

You see a girl you have never seen before, evening out the wrinkles in the Devil’s Castle’s laundry.

“Right. Now, do it again. These summer blankets, as well. Spread them out wide, then use these clothespins to keep them in place. And if they fall down, back into the wash they go!”

“Yeah, yeah. Sorry.”

“...I doubt anyone’s living on the first floor.”

I edge along the wall, check no one is looking, then hide under a tree directly beneath Room 201.

“Jeez. It’s like Ashiya cloned himself or something.”

“You have nothing to blame but your own laziness, Hanzo. If you intend to stay indoors like a hibernating mouse all day, the least you could do is assist with the daily chores.”

“I swear to...want...say it, too...”

You do not sound good.

The cicadas are making it difficult for you to make out the voices in the apartment.

“Ugh...not now! Jeez, pipe _down_ , you bastards!”

Something light bounces off your head. It turns out to be a discarded cicada skin. Your gift for language does not extend to being able to get your point across to the cicadas.

“...They _have_ to be trying to mess with me. There’s more than one species in there, too.”

I discard the skin and grumble to no one in particular.

“This might be risky, but so be it...”

I tiptoe away from the window and toward the front stairway. Then, I slowly make my way up the stairs. I’m wearing my work heels, so I make sure to tightly grasp the handrail. 12.

You’re able to make it up the stairs without incident. The kitchen window overlooking the corridor is open.

“Honestly, Hanzo, what will we ever do with you? Surely this is not beyond your comprehension.”

I crouch beneath the iron bars of the window as I listen.

“Now, then. First, you dice these shallots and grate some ginger, then you use some cold water to dilute the soup stock. Then all you have to do is bring the udon noodles to a boil, and it’ll be ready to eat at a moment’s notice. You can even serve them chilled, if you like, by immersing them in cold water right after they’re done boiling. Add a raw egg, and it will be simply perfect.”

“Oh, man, you want me to boil noodles in _this_ heat?”

“That is exactly what Ashiya does for you, every day and every meal. It would be only proper to offer him some gratitude in return.”

“Don’t let up on him, Ms. Kamazuki. I yell, and yell, and yell at him, and he never listens...”

I conclude “Ms. Kamazuki” must be the girl’s name.

“I will take care of preparations for today, so watch me carefully, lest Shiro chides your performance on the morrow. Here, grate the ginger for me. You know how to use a grater, I trust.”

“All right...”

I open the fridge.

“Hmm? Hey, Ashiya, we didn’t use up all the ginger, did we?”

“Ah... Last night’s was the last of it. Sorry, Ms. Kamazuki. We’ll have to make do with shallots alone today... Urushihara, shut the damned fridge door behind you!”

“Hmm, no ginger? It’ll be quite lacking in nutrition otherwise. I think I have some ginger amongst the vegetables I brought along. Perhaps I could fetch some? Look me look inside my room. I’m quite sure I had a healthy supply left.”

I begin to head towards the door, intent on going to my room.

“Hanzo, while I’m gone, I want you to unravel those noodles for me with those kitchen chopsticks. Slowly, now. Make sure none of the strands stick to each other.”

“Right, right, right.”

“One _right_ is quite enough! I will return shortly.”

I begin to turn the doorknob.

I begin to run towards the stairs. 5.

With the heels....you loose track of your feet and slip off the top step of the staircase. Out of the corner of your eye, you can see the contents of your bag dispersing in all directions through the air.

“Yaaaaaagghhhhh!!”

I brace myself in midair.

I move to catch you.

What?

I’m at the bottom of the stairs. So did I catch her?

Yes.

I had closed my eyes out of instinct, but I don’t feel myself hitting the road. Instead I just hear the pitter-pat of my things falling around me.

“Owwwwwwwwww...”

I timidly open my eyes.

“...Can’t you go up and down the stairs quietly at least once in your life? Man, I sure picked the wrong girl to rescue. Not like you’re gonna reward me or anything.”

Than why did you do it? You could have just let her fall.

“D-Devil King!!”

I shake my head, unable to grasp the situation.

Your belongings are scattered along the ground, save for a packet of tissues which is now perched perfectly atop Maou’s head. You yourself are currently scooped in Maou’s arms. He must have grabbed you midfall.

“L-l-let me down! What...what are you _doing_...?!”

I can feel my blood boil from head to toe.

“Put...put me down right now! Wh-what’re you trying to do to me?!”

I begin to fail me arms and legs, my face growing red.

“Well, _you’re_ the one falling off my stairs! Stop...stop squirming like that!”

Roll to see if your wild flailing hits him.

19.

“We’re really gonna...”

One of your toes lands a clean hit on Maou’s temple.

“ _Erngh_!”

My arms loosen their grip, sending you tumbling downwards.

“Agh!”

I wince as I rub my tailbone.

“Oooogh...”

“Don’t ‘oooogh’ me! Eesh! No good deed ever goes unpunished with you, huh?”

I glare down at you, holding a hand to my temple.

“Good deed, my ass! You, you, you didn’t do anything weird to me while my eyes were closed, did you?!”

“Nothing happened while your eyes were closed! Nothing besides all of your crap bouncing off my head! Did you _aim_ at me, or what?!”

“Well, that’s what you get for all the evil deeds you’re perpetrated on a daily basis!”

“I’m a law-abiding citizen! A lot more than _you_ are right now, I’m guessing!”

“What right do you have to say that?! Apologize to all the law-abiding citizens of this nation at once!”

“Look don’t even get me started, okay? Or how about I toss you down the stairs one more time? Maybe _then_ you’ll show me some gratitude!”

“I’d sooner go bungee jumping without a rope than thank you! What’re you even _doing_ down here, anyway? I thought you slept past noon every day!”

I’m wearing cotton work gloves, and there’s a broom in amongst your stuff. It appears I was sweeping around my building.

“I’m allowed to be wherever I want, all right? What’s so bad about getting up early?! I’m trying to stick to a healthy schedule so I don’t get sick this summer!”

“You? Healthy? You’re practically the poster child for MgRonald!”

I pick up on the argument and decide to go outside.

“What’re _you_ two doing...?”


	9. Chapter 9

“I simply must apologize. This would not have happened if I hadn’t thrown open the door so quickly.”

I bow deeply to Emi.  

“No, no, not at all!”

I violently shake my head in response.

“I just kind of lost track of my footing when I wasn’t paying attention.”

I look on with a sullen expression on my face as I slurp up my cold udon in soup stock.

“I picked up most of the stuff you dropped outside, Yusa.”

“Oh, thanks. Could you put it over there for me, please?”

I’m not happy about you pawing my stuff, but I don’t want to explode in front of Suzuno.

“Ugh. I _hate_ the way you talk. All high and mighty like that.”

What did I say that was ‘all high and mighty’?

In my mind, you’ve failed at hiding your distain for the residents of the apartment.

I shrug, not interesting in providing an excuse.

“And what’s with _this_ thing? It’s like an oven outside, and you’re still doing energy shots?”

I have the bottle of 5-Holy Energy B in hand.

You’re all just ignoring the fact that it’s a beta aren’t you?

It is 5-Holy Energy B now, we the majority have spoken. I respond to this with a light sense of panic, as this isn’t the sort of thing that should be bandied about the Devil’s Castle.

“Hey! Give that back!”

I swipe the bottle out of your hand, and shove it deep into my bag, glaring at you all the while.

“If you drink that stuff, you’re gonna wind up crashing like Ashiya.”

“Crashing? What, don’t tell me the heat’s made you sick...”

I look honestly surprised.

I click my tongue before turning away from you.

“So what if I did? I don’t feel too well sometimes, either, you know.”

“Not feeling too well? Like, what happens to you, exactly?”

Did you not know we could become ill, or something? Why are you asking?

Like with the clothes, when fighting demons, this is not the sort of thing one thinks about.

“I dunno, I kind of lose my appetite. It’s like my stomach starts bothering me and stuff.”

“I wouldn’t find that enjoyable.”

It’s really fucking dull, actually.

I shrug, not bothering to pursue the topic.

“I am not doing this to make you ‘enjoy’ anything, you...”

I turn towards the girl and look her over.

She looks like she could be an actress in one of your samurai dramas.

I find my eyes subconsciously directed to her chest area.

She’s about the same as you in that respect. And she has a frozen look of anguish or regret on her face, unaware of your self-comparison.

“I feel terribly remorseful about it. Perhaps I should have chosen something more nutritious to repay these fine men with.”

“No, no, Ms. Kamazuki, it isn’t your fault. I am enjoying every bit of these udon noodles.”

“Yeah. The problem’s the menu, really. I mean, yeah, it’s easy to cook and it tastes okay, but eating chilled udon day in, day out in this heat would make anyone keel over after a while.”

Your observation causes me to give you a cold stare, it’s not like you have contributed anything to our food supply.

The cold stare is shared by the others in the room. Just then, I stretch my body and turns towards Emi, seeming like I forgot something.

“But I see I’ve forgotten the most important matter! My name is Suzuno Kamazuki. I have only just settled my belongings down next door in Room 202 last week. I come from a well-known family in a very remote place, one not exposed to the modern trappings of the world, so I remain rather unaccustomed to day-to-day life here. I do hope you’ll help a simple country girl make her way in this grand city.”

“Uh...yeahh...I’m Emi Yusa. Good to meet you. But...and I don’t mean any offence...I’m amazed you chose a place like this.”

Aside from the fact that most of the other PCs live here.

“As long as I have a roof to block the rain, four walls to block the wind, and a study floor under my feet, I ask for nothing else. I have no interest in worldly luxury. I simply thought that being near the city would make finding suitable work a simpler task.”

I fix my eyes on Emi.

“I wish to find a vocation here that will make my homeland proud.”

“A wonderful ambition! You could stand to learn from her, Urushihara.”

I ignore you and return to my computer desk.

“Regardless, I am sure it is fate that brought the two of us together, in the same city within this vast country. I hope we will provide each other with warm support and goodwill toward our fellow human beings.”

I bow deeply towards you again.

“Um, yeah. You, too.”

I return your bow.

“Whew! Thanks for the noodles. That was great!”

I let out a massive yawn as I pass, bringing my utensils to the sink.

“Man, though...I’ve got so much to do, and remember, and stuff. It’s wrecking my mind.”

“What do you mean? You’re just manning the grill like always, right?”

My brow furrows as I ask.

“Oho! Well, that’s where you’re wrong. While you were off wasting away your life, I’ve made some serious advances as a member of human society. Yeah, that’s right, Emi! Get load of this! Starting on Saturday - tomorrow - I’m going to be the afternoon associate manger at the Hatagaya station MgRonald!”

I cock my head back, hands on my hips.

“Yeah, woo, congrats.”

I nod sarcastically and give you the world’s most unenthusiastic round of applause.

“Hah! You don’t even believe me, do you? Well, it’s true! My first bona fide managerial role! And an hourly wage hike to match, too!”

“What I’m not believing is that you’re seriously trying to brag about it. But, hey, that’s great, I guess? Why don’t you just keep focusing on your career if you like it so much?”

“Pfft. So, what, you’ve got no aspirations whatsoever? Well, fine. Someday, I’m going to be way up high, and you’ll be gritting your teeth in anger while your stuck here, falling down my stairs all the damn time!”

I stick out my tongue at you.

I counter by throwing a nearby tissue box at you.

I dodge, 20.

Again? You should really try and save your luck for something else. You easily dodge the box, causing it to land on Ashiya behind you.

I grumpily flick the box aside and wriggle back into my blanket.

I’m kneeling politely, dourly looking up at Emi.

I lock eyes with you.

“Wh-what...”

“Emi...”

I glance at Maou, then bring my lips to your ear.

“Are you in a close relationship, perhaps, with Sadao?”

“Haaahhhh? Wh-what did you just say?!”

“Well, I merely noticed that your conversation was quite, shall we say, confrontational? Or perhaps _frank_ is a more suitable word. There is certainly no sense of reserve between the two of you.”

“Yeah...I suppose it’s easy to get that impression, but...”

I’m staring at you, chuckling to myself.

“ _You_ stay out of this!”

I glare at you.

“Maybe there’s no reserve, but more than that, there’s no trust, no faith, no friendship, and no other kind of positive human emotion between us, either. Nothing! In fact, if he died in an accident on the way home from work today, I honestly wouldn’t mind much at all. So let’s just make sure we have _that_ straight, all right?”

“I-I see...”

It seems like a sense of relief crosses my eyes.

“I don’t want to pry...”

I whisper into your ear.

“But are _you_ aiming for that stupid Devil King, too?”


	10. Chapter 10

My face turns as white as a sheet. I grab your arm and wordlessly pull you out of the room.

“Uh? Ah! Wait a...!”

I slam the door behind me after sneaking a quick look inside.

“What...what will we do if he hears you?”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t think you really...”

I guess this campaign only allows for so many reasons for people to join up.

Yeah, at least if you want your character interacting with the main party at all.

“I..I must say, I am quite impressed.”

I put a hand to my heart, taking a deep breath to calm my nerves.

“How did you ever know?”

“How did I know? Well... I dunno, I guess I just kind of thought so..”

“I...see. Very well done...”

“Listen, Suzuno. I’m sorry if I’m being too intrusive, but there’s something I want to tell you.”

“...What is that?”

“I think you better keep your distance from him. Otherwise, it’s just gonna make you unhappy.”

“Unhappy...? In what way?”

I look up at you, my face confused.

“That’s...not the kind of guy any regular person can handle. I’m just saying, it’s best if you don’t get too close to him.”

“...! B-but, but, I may not seem that way, but I’ve been through a great deal of trials and tribulations in my life! But... all right. If that is what you say, I will keep a respectful distance away. I am sure there is something between you and he that I am not aware of. But no matter what you may say, I am in no position to leave at this point. I know this is terribly audacious of me, but I hope you will provide me with whatever assistance you deem appropriate.”

I give you a respectful, standing bow.

“Certainly, if I can.”

I smile at you and nod.

“Very well... Thank you. My mind is at ease now, a little.”

“Oh! Hang on a moment.”

I gently push you aside and enter the apartment.

“You guys didn’t do anything weird while I was gone, did you?”

I glare at Urushihara in particular.

What have _I_ done to deserve special attention? ...That _she_ knows about at least.

“I ain’t in _that_ much of a hurry to die.”

I keep one eye on Urushihara as I take out my memo pad and pen, rip off a sheet of paper and jot something down. Then I give the sheet to Suzuno.

“This is my address, my phone number, and my e-mail. If these guys do anything to you, you can call me for help anytime.”

“Very well. I owe you a great debt.”

I nod and delicately place the paper into my kimono.

“Look, who do you think we are, anyway?”

I speak up as I wipe off the dishes.

“I think you’re a bunch of hideous monsters that I’d put even a cockroach above, that’s what. I doubt you’re gonna do it now, but if you do anything weird to Suzuno, I’m gonna rip your head off hang it out that window, all right?”

“What are you, Dracula?”

I pay your comeback no mind.

“...Well. I better push off. But don’t worry. They may not look it, but they’ve got every reason not to break any laws right now.”

I drape my shoulder bag over my body. Then I turn towards Maou.

“Be good to her, all right? I’m serious here. Men and women run on _real_ different wavelengths!”

“Yeah, I don’t need to be reminded. But at least I’m not gonna ignore the help she gives me, unlike _certain_ people I know. Get out already!”

I accept your response.

“Right. See you.”

I shut the door behind me and head for the stairs.

And your roll?

11.

Adding in the shoes...you begin tumbling down the stairs, but you have a chance at recovery.

“Y-y-yaaaagghhhhhh!!”

17.

You catch yourself about halfway down.

Meanwhile I, upon hearing you scream, lunged for the door and made my way to the corridor to see if you require assistance.

I am holding on to the handrail with both hands.

“I-I-I’m fine. I’m fine this time, okay? Really.”

I let out a horse chuckle before slowly making my way down the rest of the stairs. I then walk briskly away in very apparent shame.

I call from inside.

“She bite it again?”

“No, she regained control of herself halfway.”

“...Yeah, looked that way. She’s sure going fast, though. Like she’s trying to run away from us.”

I mumble my agreement without moving my eyes from my computer screen.


	11. Chapter 11

“Okay, Maa! The fate of tomorrow’s afternoon shift rests upon your shoulders. Stay diligent! Don’t let the new Sentucky Fried Chicken get the jump on us! I’ll make sure to have my phone on me in case any emergencies come up, but unless it’s something really catastrophic, you can go ahead and make any decisions that need to be made yourself. This is meant to help you grow, after all.”

And to move your plot forward, no doubt.

“Absolutely.”

“Good. I like to hear that. Do your best out there, okay? Don’t make me have to send you to Trinidad and Tobago.”

“I thought you were joking.” 

Since there’s no way you would split the party on purpose.

“The only time I make jokes is when I want people to laugh.”

Does that mean you actually _would_?

If I had to.

“We don’t have much staff on hand this shift, so you better brace yourself. Think of it as getting a head start on your shift-supervisor job.”

“Huh?”

I glance at the shift schedule posted on the wall.

The only lines extending to close at midnight belong to you and Kisaki. From 5 until 10 another line joins yours.

“Ooh. Chi, huh...?”

“You aren’t sill having a tiff with her or anything, are you?”

“Not a tiff, no...”

Kisaki squints coldly at you.

“Well, if whatever it is starts affecting our daily sales, you’ll wish you were in Trinidad and Tobago. You’d probably wind up somewhere like Greenland instead.”

“What, above the Arctic Circle?! Does anyone even _live_ there?”

“Well, that’s rude to Greenlanders, don’t you think? Greenland’s part of the kingdom of Denmark; it’s got its own parliament and everything. Over one hundred thousand people live there! There’s even a movement to make it independent from...”

“I didn’t ask for geographical trivia...”

Why you decided to give it to me, I don’t know.

“...and besides, I’m not going anywhere _near_ there! What do you mean by ‘whatever it is’...?”

“I _mean_ , if some young new manager can do the work but has trouble dealing with a teenage girl taking a fancy to him, then fine. That I can laugh off. But if that trouble starts affecting my bottom line...don’t expect any mercy.”

This straight talk causes me to need to lean on the counter for balance.

“I mean, you know, am I going to have to bar female employees from working with you, or what?”

Kisaki doesn’t appear to care about your reaction. The clock ticks mercilessly away, until, before you know it, it’s already five o’clock. The automatic door in front of you opens.

I belt out automatically.

“Welcome to MgRonald!”

“Oh, um, h-hello.”

I’m reporting to work still dressed in a summer outfit.

“Uh...mm...hey.”

“Oh, hey there, Chi.”

“Uh... Oh! Um, good afternoon, Ms. Kisaki!”

I give Ms. Kisaki a look for delighted interest, which is completely different from the look I have for you.

“Go get changed, okay? Maou’s gonna have a lot of work to do starting tomorrow, so he’ll probably have a lot to discuss with you, too.”

“Ah...uh, yeah. Sorry.”

I nod and then walk past Maou into the staff-room.

“Heh. Looks like a terminal case.”

Kisaki grins to herself while showing Chiho off.

“I have to admit, this _is_ leaving me ever-so-slightly worried as I leave the store in your capable hands.”

“Ever so slightly...? I know Chi and I are a little awkward with each other right now, but it’s not like we’re fighting or anything. It’s not going to affect our work at all.”

I’m staring at the staff-room door as I say this.

“Well, even if _you’re_ fine with it, Chi might not be so much. We may all just be cogs in the huge machine that we call the MgRonald Corporation, but before that, we’re human beings. You can’t get a bead on how people interact with each other from a single viewpoint. Even if you try to, it’s not going to improve things around the workplace.”

“You...think? I suppose so.”

I cast my eyes downwards.

“Ahh, you’ll be fine. Chi’s still young. Inexperienced. She just needs at little while longer to get herself together. Once the right spark comes along, she’ll be back to normal in no time.”

I take a long, hard look at my boss.

“I have to hand it to you, Ms. Kisaki. You’re really something.”

“Hey, it’s just work drama. Get as old as I am, and it starts to come naturally.”

I try to focus on the predinner rush checklist.

Kisaki stops you.

“Let’s have Chi handle that, shall we? I want to take a close look at how she works when we’re not busy.”

“Um, sure...”

Kisaki plucks the check list from your hands.

“Better take your break while you still can, Maa. You can go out and have dinner as long as you’re back by six...unless you wanted to eat here?”

I shake my head at the invite.

“Thanks, but I’ll take my break in the staff room. I brought a bento box along today.”

“A bento, huh? Starting to cook for yourself a little? Well, just make sure whatever you cook doesn’t start rotting in this heat before you can eat it. That goes double in a food service job like this. Keep your bento in a cool, dark place, and don’t forget to stick a dried umeboshi plum in there to absorb the moisture.”

You don’t want to get food poisoning do you?

I nod.

“I’m all squared away there. I’d be in trouble if I couldn’t work, after all. Anyway, see you after my break.”

I set my time-clock code to break, and then I venture into the staff room.


	12. Chapter 12

I have just stepped out of the women’s changing area.

“Oh...”

Once I notice your there, I swallow nervously and avert my eyes.

“Uh...so, I’m going on break for a second. Ms. Kisaki said she wanted to check out your, like, work ethic or whatever before we got busy.”

“A-all right...”

I start to pass by your side when I notice you taking a package out your messenger bag.

It’s wrapped in a bandanna I purchased from the one-hundred-yen shop.

I stop for a moment.

“Maou, is that...?”

Is she actually speaking to me again?

Well, I was starting to get bored with ignoring you. Plus, she’s only really involved in the plot through her interactions with you.

I unwrap the bandanna, revealing a dual-tier bento box, on the large side. I bring it up a face level.

“This? Just a bento meal.”

“A bento...? That’s kind of a cute pattern on it. Did Ashiya buy it on sale or something?”

“Nah, I borrowed it from my neighbour. Did I mention that? Someone moved in next door a little while ago.”

“Someone moved in? ...Into _that_ apartment?”

My eyes open wide in innocent surprise.

Oblivious as ever, I see.

“This _girl_?!”

“Whoa! You don’t have to yell like that.”

You scream was enough to make me jump.

I ignore you.

“Y-you, you borrowed a bento box from, from this young girl? What on earth is-”

I grab your collar and begin pulling it to and fro.

“Hey, Chi, stop shaking me!”

“S-so, so, so this _girl_...this girl lent it to you, Maou...”

“Y-y-y-yeah. Yeah, so please stop shaking me, Chi...”

The Devil King is really physically helpless against a teenage girl?

I don’t exactly have a lot of magic right now, do I?

“I...I really don’t want to imagine this...like, _really, really_ don’t want to! But...but did _she_ make it?”

My hands are still firmly gripping your shirt.

“I...I...I guess she did, probably. I think.”

“C-c-can, can, can, can...”

“Can?”

“Can, can I take a look at, at what’s inside?”

“Yes! Yes, so stop shaking me! Please!”

I finally remove my hands from your collar, and peer warily into your bento box.

The topmost tier is packed to the gills with little side dishes in a dazzling array of colours. There’s braised burdock root, chikuzenni, kikka-kabu, vinegar-marintaed sliced carrots and daikon radish and kuri kinton sweets made chestnut paste.

“Osechi...?”

“Osechi? Which?”

It’s traditional Japanese New Year’s cuisine.

I shake my head.

“Let me see the bottom tier!”

I whisk away the topmost box.

Atop a bed of white rice is an enormous heart-shaped design made of seaweed, bordered by an enclosed row of fresh dried plums.


	13. Chapter 13

“‘Lo...”

As you step into Friend Market, you’re greeted by a clerk.

I make a beeline for the bento corner.

“...I always end up buying the same thing, don’t I?”

I grab a curry meal, some coleslaw, a cup of instant soup and an éclair for dessert. I bring my food up to the counter.

“‘Eat it up ‘ere?”

I nod at the clerk as he totals up my purchases.

“‘nk youuu. Come back soooon.”

I pick up the plastic bag housing my meal.

You feel a clear murderous rage fixated upon you. There is a black shadow lunging towards you, at a speed not Japanese person could manage. Of course thanks to it’s speed, the automatic door fails to open for them in time, and it collides with it, falling with a thud.

You’re finally putting some plot in motion, huh?

Well, I had to rework some things so I could include Suzuno.

“Nn? Whuzzat?”

Your assailant has a small build, and is lying on the ground. They are wearing a shiny plastic rain poncho, camouflage pants and a black ski mask.

I toss my bag on the floor and slink back towards the register to put my purchases down.

“Sssir, y’all right?”

The clerk seems to think the figure on the ground is a customer who has had an unfortunate accident. But once he approaches the door, your assailant's strange clothing gives him pause.

“Get away!”

I push the frozen clerk out of the way.

He barrels into a rack of free-help magazines. A blade of light rips through the air where the clerk was standing a minute before. The large weighted mass flies by you, scraping your shoulder and tearing the sleeve of your shirt to ribbons. It also cleaves open the bag with your newly purchased bento inside.

I check to ensure the clerk is still on the ground.

He is.

I launch my holy sword and move to attack the interloper.

“Heavenly Wind Blade!!”

14.

The guided shock wave your blade released slams against your assailant, sending them flying out of the store with a loud crash.

“Stay in here and call the police!”

I shoot out of the store before the clerk has the opportunity to see my sword. I wouldn’t want to end up like Olba after all.

Another flash of cleaving light is waiting for you as soon as you go outside.

I move to deflect the bolt with my Holy Sword. 12.

A deft turn of your sword deflects the bolt. As you do so, there is the clang of metal on metal.

I leap away from my attacker.

“Heavenly Fleet Feet!!”

I focus my Cloth of the Dispeller squarely on my legs, using it to jump forward and land in the roof of the house across the street.

Your ski-masked attacker doesn’t once look away from you.

I use my new vantage point to get a closer look at my attacker. Clearly this is no ordinary thug, that seems a bit simple for you.

Well I’m might have to do that at some point now, just to keep you people on your toes. A perfectly human, Earth-native opponent of some sort.

And the opponent in front of me right now?

Well their clothing and stature you have already observed, but now you notice your opponent is holding an enormous scythe that they clearly weren’t before.

Okay, if there was any doubt this fashion disaster was from Ente Isla, it’s definitely gone now.

So you’ve actually taken up the ‘throw Ente Islan attackers at the players’ approach to plot building?

You seemed to respond positively when this happened last campaign, so this is what I’m going with. Plus it means I can actually _use_ some of the characters I thought up as opponents for you.

Are there a lot of them or something?

There’s a whole folder. And each of the sheets is really quite detailed.

How would _you_ know?

The GM let me look at them, after being convinced this is the sort of information my character would have run across.

His mentor again?

Yep.

Please tell me you plan to include them in the plot later.

Of course I am, I just need to build up some other plot points first.

“I don’t know if you’re human or a demon or whatever, but why are you attacking me in public like this?! I don’t care about myself, but if you’re going to hurt the people of Japan, don’t expect any mercy from me!”

I bring the Better Half level with my body, and keep it high as I leap off the roof.

“Rrnnnngh!”

Your assailant remains still, then swipes their scythe downward in a grand arc, deflecting your holy sword.

I try to use the momentum from this to twist around and kick my opponent in the head. 8.

Your kick misses your opponent’s head, instead connecting with their left shoulder.

I prepare to rush at my now dazed opponent, aiming my sword at their solar plexus.

The scythe-wielder releases a beam of purple light from beneath their ski mask, aimed towards you. For some reason, your instincts tell you not to let this beam of light touch you.

I try to cut through the beam of light with my holy sword. 17.

You’re successful, but the upon connecting with the purple light, your holy sword is robbed of it’s light, and shrinks to the size of a long dagger.

“Huh...?!”

I bring the sword back, attempting to bring it back to it’s 'phase one' size.

You fail, and your attacker is all-too ready to take advantage of your confusion, firing a barrage of these beams of purple light at you.

I begin dodging. 15.

“Wh-what the hell _is_ this?!”

Suddenly, the scythe-wielder groans, and the barrage of light ceases.

I turn towards my opponent.

Their dark-coloured ski mask is know a florescent orange, right down to the eyes.

“No!”

A round orange blast of something flies across your view, striking your opponent on the shoulder, spreading bright orange across most of their Windbreaker.

I look back towards the convenience store, looking for the source of the attack and the voice.

The clerk is standing in his full glory outside of his shop, throwing anti-theft paintballs at your attacker. Your opponent is know lying on the ground in agony, the paint from the first wave having seeped through their ski mask.

“Hey...”

This clerk seems both very brave and very stupid.

Why? He has no idea that your opponent has magic powers. He thinks its a simple burglar. Hence his course of action is perfectly reasonable.

I turn towards my assailant.

Your opponent is fleeing, stumbling wildly across the street.

“Huh...? ...Uhhhh.”

What was that?

I thought I would be sporting and actually give you an opportunity to think about how you might counter this opponent next time they appear, rather than simply having them flatten you right off.

“N-no! Get back ‘ere!!”

The clerk remains unfazed and continues his paintball assault as his downed for lurches off. You can here paintballs spattering in the darkness, but you can’t tell whether any of them hit their mark or not.

I dissipate my sword back into my body as quickly as I can, not understanding why an assassin from Ente Isla would flee from a paintball assault.

“Oh! Yer aright, ma’am?!”

“Are _you_ okay? I’m sorry I pushed you away like that.”

“Ah, no biggie. Jus’ kinda hit my ‘ead a little.”

There’s a red mark on his forehead, apparently from where he plunged head first into the help-wanted-magazine rack.

“Should we call the police or something?”

“Oh, yeah, the silent ‘larm shoulda already called the security dudes ‘n the cops for us!”

Then the clerk picks up you hand, suddenly remembering something.

“Oh, ‘n, uh, so the ‘mployee manual sezzat I needa keep alla customers ‘nside. You mind waitin’ a sec ‘til the cops show up?”

I groan.

“...Umm, sure, no problem.”

I dejectedly go back inside to my shredded shopping bag.

Inside your curry, coleslaw and éclair have been mixed together into a pulp.

I pluck the lone survivor out of my bag and turn towards the clerk.

“Can I get some hot water? I’m hungry, so I’m hoping I could at least have the soup while I’m waiting.”

‘At least’? Are you actually planning on eating that slop later?

No, I meant at least the soup _survived_. My attacker seems to have murdered the rest of my dinner.

The clerk turns on a water kettle in the corner, and fills the soup cup before inviting you to have a seat in the back office.


	14. Chapter 14

“Well, _that_ fight sure cost me.”

I have way more magic available than I did last campaign, thanks to Emeralda. But then you _of course_ had to bring in an opponent apparently capable of nullifying that.

The GM giveth, the GM taketh away.

Apparently. I sip at my soup after letting the water seep into it for a minute.

“Uh, ma’am, this’s yers?”

The clerk steps back in carrying the shoulder bag you tossed aside at the beginning of the battle.

“Oh, sorry. Thanks.”

I take it from him.

As you do so, he points to the bag.

“Uhh, I think th’ phone’s goin’ off’r something...”

“Huh? Oh. Ah!”

I blush instinctively as I pluck vibrating phone out of my bag.

It’s going off at full volume.

My ringtone is a sonorous rendition of the theme from _Maniac Shogun_.

“Uh...ha-ha-ha-ha! You’d, uh, you’d be surprised how addictive that show is.”

You really don’t need to make excuses to the clerk, you know.

I bring to phone up to my face.

“Yusa! Yusa, something’s up with Maou!”

Your frenzied scream makes me move my head away from the phone for a minute.

“Ch-Chiho? What’s going on?”

“Maou! Maou, Maou...”

“What about him? Is he dead?”

I think she’d be a bit _more_ hysterical of that were the case, don’t you?

“No, he brought a bento in! A homemade bento!”

My voice is tear-laced as I report this awful news.

I swallow a mouthful of soup, and try to figure out why a bento would make anyone want to cry.

“A bento? So what? The food at MgRonald isn’t free. Ashiya’s probably needling him to cook at home more often. What’s so unusual about...”

“It’s not Ashiya! It’s a big heart mark with a bento - _girl_ , homemade, two tiers!!”

“All right, could you calm down a little and get nouns and verbs and stuff in the right order?”

I smirk to myself, now knowing full well why you’re so worked up.

“So who’s it from? That girl who moved in next to them?”

“You _knew_ about that, Yusa?! And you’re willing to put up with that?”

“Huh? Put up with what?”

I really have no real reason to care about what he’s eating.

“I...don’t see why I wouldn’t. I mean, sure, if the Devil King gets in better shape, that might put the entire world in danger someday in the long term, but I can’t watch over every single decision in his life.”

I mull over the Suzuno situation while sipping another mouthful of soup.

“And you still call yourself a Hero, Yusa?!”

Your rebuke makes me hold the phone away again.

“What if that next-door neighbour is some bad guy or assassin who’s thinking up ways to kill Maou and his pals? What then?”

Well, that’s not the sort of thing I would expect out of Chiho.

“And besides, don’t you think it’s all just a little too _weird_? These three guys, all living in a cramped, decrepit apartment - they’ve plainly got no money, and they’re not particularly cool or whatever anyway, and this girl just moves right in and gets that close to them? That just doesn’t happen! Maou told me it was just a neighbourly gift, but what kind of girl would do that for a neighbour, a complete stranger she just me a few days ago?!”

“... I know I’m not in any position to ask, but you _do_ like him, right, Chiho?”

You seem to be laying a lot of abuse onto him.

“Well, I’m just _saying_ , I’m about the only girl who would even _think_ about doing something like that!”

Aaahhhh. Your about to face some perils in that regard. Although....

Although, what?

It seems a little too coincidental that I would be suddenly attacked in the street right after giving Suzuno my contact information. But, then, aside from their frames the two don’t seem to have much really in common...

Plus, Suzuno’s my character, and your attacker was an NPC.

It’s not like using the GM as a proxy to hide the identity of an attacking player character hasn’t been done before. By people in this room.

“Yusa? Hey, Yusa?”

I’m having a crisis over here!

Over a bento.

Yes.

“Oh! Sorry. I was just thinking about something.”

“Well, look, Yusa. You’re the Hero, right? So you’re gonna have to defeat Maou sometime, right?!”

“I... Well, yeah, pretty much, but...”

“So, you know, if you wanted to help me out...”

How is my plan to mercilessly slay the Devil King going to help you out as his would-be girlfriend?


	15. Chapter 15

Soo... The first report of Olba Meiyer’s disappearance sent shock waves across the All Bishop’s Sanctuary, the meeting place of the six archbishops that lead the Church. 

Especially since Olba was not only a member of their cable, but one of those who joined the Hero in her quest to dispatch the Devil King. But the Reconciliation Panel’s report into his disappearance produced a report even more shocking. First, that the Hero Emilia was alive and well in another world.

No doubt one of the bishop’s would have brought up Olba’s story about that matter.

Which was?

That the Hero Emilia and her sword disappeared into nothing at the end of a pitched battle with the Devil King.

But that has been proven to be complete fabrication, especially by the traces of the multiple sonar transmissions that got sent to that world over the course of the last campaign.

Emeralda and Albert’s capture was also orchestrated by Olba, so that would also be something that would have to be brought up.

What happened to them anyway? Whatever they’re doing in Ente Isla is probably relevant to this report.

Oh, it totally is. Emeradla has returned to her home in Saint Aile, publicly avowing Emilia's safety and spreading the word of Olba’s apostasy far and wide.

Something that would no doubt elicit quite the reaction when stated.

Oh, yes, and cries about the implications of an archbishop being branded a heretic would be loud and many.

I think they would probably view Emeralda as the most problematic, since she holds so much political clout in Saint Aile.

You’re right. So what exactly is the response you're going to have to the uproar?

Can I do it in character?

Go right ahead. You did witness the latter end of me blocking out what Emeralda and Albert were doing before the Battle in Sasazuka, right?

I did, it was funny.

Thanks. Away, go ahead with whatever it was you wanted to say.

Could you answer back as one or two of the bishops, too?

I can try.

“...And if Saint Aile’s most well-known court alchemist is officially declaring that Emilia is alive, we cannot ignore the impact this will have. It directly conflicts with the Church’s public position that Emilia is dead. I request a well-considered decision.”

“A well...considered...”

The archbishop speaking is hyperventilating slightly.

“Will you recognize the mistakes Archbishop Olba has made, or will you continue to push the Church’s decisions upon its people?”

The sanctuary is plunged into profound silence at your words.

“Or, to be more exact, will you affirm and condemn the apostasy committed by the archbishop against the Church, or will you instead decide to murder Emeralda, Albert, and finally Emilia herself?”

“This is ridiculous... Emilia and Albert are one thing, but what could we do against Saint Aile’s court alchemist...?”

I love how it isn’t the murder that is upsetting him, but the political clout of one of the people they would have to murder.

“It is something the Church has always done, ever since the days when the Devil King’s armies freely roamed the land, in order to solidify the Western Island as a monolith under the name of the Church. And when I say ‘the Church’, I mean myself and the other members of the former Council of Inquisitors. No matter which option you select, the Church will have to pay a great sacrifice. But if we leave the problem unattended like this, the sun will set for good upon the Church’s infallibility and authority. I doubt many people would choose to place their faith upon a Church so willing to throw away the Hero, the hope of the people, the woman who dispatched the Devil King.”

“You are part of the Council of...that is, The Reconciliation Panel, yes? How would you handle this question?”

“I am sure, Archbishop...Cervantes, that you understand the import of the Council transforming itself into the Reconciliation Panel, at least in name. In the past, it was the goal of defeating the Devil King that united us. But now, when everyone believes that threat to be gone, it would be a grave mistake to believe that simply any act in the name of the gods shall be forgiven.”

“Wh-what are you saying?”

“I was hoping that the initial shock would subside before I continued. But Satan, the Devil King, is also alive and well on this other world.” 

Well, that actually really helpful.

I’ve found planning and acting out character backstory does help in figuring out their motivations. Plus it’s helped me map out the current state of Ente Isla a bit more, which in turn helps with planning plot developments.

How much advance planning do you _do_ , anyway? You seem to have a veritable tome of papers over there.

Far, far too much. You know, you think I would have learned not to overplan when GMing for these people, but here I am.

You know that is partially your fault for letting them make up world-building details on the fly.

I know, I know. But that was more in reaction to them making it very difficult for me to actually reveal planned world-building details.

Because they straight up left the world you were building?

Even before that they'd broken my plot pretty bad.

Well two player characters did meet their death at the hands of another player character.

Exactly. So I'm currently resolving to plan tentatively, and to always be prepared to revise based on what my players decide to do.

Seems sensible.

Hopefully it works out alright, but you never really know. That’s the thing with players, what you think is important and what they think is important can turn out to be two very different things.


	16. Chapter 16

We’re standing in front of the door to the Devil’s Castle.

“So you’re having trouble drumming up the confidence?”

“Well, I mean...you know.”

I’m hiding behind you, peeking fugitively at the door.

“If I fail here, I don’t know if I can recover from that by myself... I’m just saying, it wasn’t really right for the summer season, but it was, like, a really well-made bento box! Plus, you know, if it’s got poison or something in it, Maou and his friends could be in big trouble...”

Okay, now she’s just rationalizing things.

“If an Ente Islan assassin was going to poison him, they would’ve done it ages ago. Well, standing here and blaming us for all of this isn’t going to accomplish anything. Just be yourself. Take the bull by the horns.”

“...All right!”

I push you in front of me, giving you a reassuring pat on the shoulder.

I turn back around after a moment, the nervousness still plain on my face.

“Uhm, Yusa? I’m sorry. Thank you.”

“No problem, I don’t care about them at all, but I want to still be friends with you, Chiho, so...”

Plus, I think the GM would start crying if I killed them at this point.

Well, I might have to hold a wake for all the plot threads you severed by doing that.

I take another deep breath to build up my confidence, then I ring the Devil’s Castle doorbell.

“Ah, yes, welcome back.”

I freeze, unbreathing at the sound of this unfamiliar voice outside the door.

I open the door, clad in an aqua-blue kimono and my apron.

“Ah, good morning, Emi...and may I ask who you are?”

“I-I-I...”

I sound vaguely like someone superglued my throat shut.

“Sadao, there is a visitor at the door.”

And you have now just it made it even worse. The sheer hopelessness of my situation is making it hard for me to remain standing.

I really don’t have lifeboat I can give you at this point.

Neither do I, before you even ask.

“Uh? Is Emi back around again?”

“No, not merely Emi.”

“Huh?”

I wander over to the door.

“Whoa, Chi?! What’re you you doing here? It’s pretty early, isn’t it?”

“M-Maou...”

My eyes have already begun to tear up.

I bring a hand up to my forehead.

“Um, ah, well, um, I, uh, if you’d, uh, like, uh, to eat...”

“Uh, is something up, Chi?”

You didn’t notice something was up before?

“Oh... Is Ms. Sasaki out there...?”

My voice is listless, but still manages to boom out the front door.

“I hate to bother you, Ms. Kamazuki, but I have some teabags inside the shelf under the sink...”

“Ashiya?”

I notice you’re lying on the floor, covered by a blanket.

“Oh, no, are you sick, Ashiya?”

“Yeah, I dunno whether to call it that or not, actually.”

I scratch my head as my eyes dart between Chiho and Ashiya.

“Huh?”

My eyes are still full of tears as I flash you a look of utter bewilderment.


	17. Chapter 17

“Oh, my, look at how finely you chopped these shiso herbs! It’s so beautiful...”

“Yes! And a well-sharpened knife performs half of the work for you. After that, take a leaf, cut it in half, place the halves on top of each other, crumple them up, then cut them into strips, and it could hardly be easier.”

“So how did you get the red leaf lettuce all crisp like that?”

“Well, first you wash it throughly in cold water, then just shake the excess water off. Remove the core and set it aside first. That will help you remove the sand and other bits of dirt you wouldn’t normally see. Much more effective than simply running it under the tap.”

“Don’t you need any soy sauce on this hiyayakko tofu?”

“Oh, no. I use a solution of white soup stock diluted in water. That way, the taste of the tofu won’t clash so harshly against the saltiness. It results in a much softer, smoother flavour.”

Well, you really can’t what people are going to do.

Amen to that.

Well, Chiho doesn’t really have to be all that afraid of Suzuno anymore, since she’s only here to help out since Ashiya’s sick. So really, why wouldn’t she be friendly?

“Well! I should say the variety of food Chiho brought for us will result in quite a lovely breakfast.”

“Uh...well, hey, thanks a lot, Chi. This is kind of a surprise. Can’t wait to tuck into it.”

My hand wavers over the table as I am unable to decide what I want to eat first.

“Of...of course!”

“Thanks a lot, Ms. Kamazuki...”

I bow my head.

“Hmm. We’ve got at lot of people here. Do we have enough teacups and chopsticks?”

I begin a quick head count.

“Oh, I brought my own.”

I cheerfully take a small box from my bag.

“Very well. In that case, Emi, I do hope you will sit next to me. I am afraid I have nothing but disposable chopsticks to offer, but...”

I offer you a set of wooden chopsticks, inviting you to eat. I them assist in fetching cups and chopsticks for everyone else.

“Huh. Breakfast already?”

I flash a dirty look at you.

Seconded.

“I don’t see any seat or chopsticks or teacup for me, man.”

You’re all filling up the table.

There’s a plastic container and fork on the computer desk.

Really?! Since when did you all decide that my character was going to be the punching bag of this campaign?

Well, you did try to murder almost everyone else here.

That is generally a poor way to make friends.

What’s _your_ excuse then? Plus, Emi’s tried to kill other PCs too. So why is she getting better treatment?

“Our guests come first. And the person who contributed the least to the meal comes last.”

“...Dude, you’re gonna so regret this. Like, isn’t this the container my Sugiya dinner came in?”

I mutter to myself before taking the container and forking some rice into it.

I don’t think anyone has any sympathy for you.

“So...how are you, anyway, Ashiya? Are you feeling okay?”

“Thank you for your concern, Ms. Sasaki. Thanks to Ms. Kamazuki’s kindness, I have been given ample opportunity to rest my weary bones. I hardly wish to be any more a burden to our Devil’s Castle, so I plan to return to my regular routine beginning today.”

“And we have Chiho to thank for that. Such a cornucopia of rejuvenating ingredients she brought along! Nothing like some good meat to revitalize a man’s appetite.”

“Well, thank you! I wish I could cook like you, though, Suzuno.”

By the way, have your suspicions about Suzuno been cleared up yet?

Well I think the GM would have pointed out if I smelled paint by this point, so I’m assuming it wasn’t you, since my attacker to a direct paintball hit took the face.

“Ah, experience has a way of making anyone a veteran over time, Chiho. I am sure the day will come when you surpass even me in the kitchen.”

“Yeah, but Mom cooks for the family at my place, so don’t really get much opportunity to practice.”

“Oh, the opportunity will come, trust me on that. I, too, was fed very well by my family through all my life, but in many ways, it was more a matter of them continually pushing food in my direction. Why, when I moved away, they made me bring a virtual larder filled with supplies!”

Well, that explains where all the food keeps coming from. Since they certainly weren’t buying it.

“They were kindly hoping to aid me with my finances until I found useful employment in the city, but having an enormous quantity will only lead to it all spoiling in the summer heat. So, if I may say so in front of all of you, having three hale young men with healthy appetites next door has been a great help to me.”

“What kind of work are you thinking of, by the way?”

I give you a strange look before taking a look at Maou and Ashiya and nodding to myself.

“I will not ask for a salaried position. As long as the proceeds allow me a bare pittance to live on, I have no complaints.”

“Well, why don’t you come work at my place?”

I freeze in place. 

My eyebrows furrow.

I tilt my head to the side.

I turn my eyes towards the ceiling.

“...Ah, jeez.”

There’s being oblivious and than there’s just being a fucking _idiot_.

“We’re kinda low on staff for a lot of shifts right now, so I don’t think we’d have a problem taking someone else on. Because, Chi’ll be there, so you’ll have someone familiar around while you’re learning the ropes.”

Has the reason why Chiho is here at all even _occurred_ to you?

“Well, you can’t really make her answer that question right on the spot, can you? You can think of her as a potential applicant, of course, but...you know, there are good things and bad things about having personal acquaintances as your coworkers. So maybe you should, you know, think about it a little more first?”

I look at you with my eyes wide open.

“True... You do have a point.”

I nod my agreement.

“Thank you very much for the offer, Sadao. I will give it due consideration. And who knows? Perhaps I will ask you for a formal introduction at a later time.

“Yeah, uh, sure thing.”

“And if I do, I do hope you will put in a good word for me, Chiho.”

“A-all right.”

I steal a glance at Emi before nodding to you.

“Would you like me to maybe show you around Shinjuku and so on?”

Mm?

There’s no way Emi’ll just let you live in this place for your whole life.

“It’ll be easier to pick up on things if it’s just us women together. Let these guys take you, and who knows what kind of weirdo things they’ll teach you.”

“Hey, that’s just being mean!”

“Well, even if it is, I’m confident I could do a better job of it than _you_ could.”

I snort haughtily at you.

I shrug. This conversation is rather boring anyway.

I pick up your shoulder bag.

“And how ‘bout maybe you lend her some clothing or something? You know, for work and stuff. I think she looks cute in a kimono, but she’s, like, gonna need a suit and a bag, right? Like, office casual, like you’ve got on, Emi. You could be a secretary or something, right?”

While I agree with your comment, I don’t appreciate the fact that you’ve picked up my bag and are bandying it about.

“Hey! You can’t just touch that! You’ll infect me with your unemployed-itis!”

“It’s not a disease! I was just looking at it! Jeez!”

“I’m amazed you can just _do_ stuff like that, Urushihara.”

“Aw, quit it already! You’re all treating me like some sort of idiot!”

Seriously, are you people going to let up on me at _all_?

“Indeed, however, my chest of drawers is lacking in such things. I have little in the way of purses or footwear. Perhaps I had best atone for that, if necessary.”

“You’ve got more than just...kimonos, right?”

“I do not. I have kimonos, and sandals, and these socks, but none of the pairings that you or Chiho are sporting so dashingly. Is that...strange, in some way?”

“No, nothing strange about it, exactly, but...”

“Damn, Suzuno, you’re like some kind of samurai princess.”

“...Yusa, if you could perhaps introduce me to a clothing store as well...”

“Umm, sure! If we have the time.”

I nod at Chiho, nervousness written on my face.

I return both the gesture and the look.

“I dunno, as long as you don’t come out looking all weird...”

Must be nice to actually be able to afford new stuff.


	18. Chapter 18

“Well, thanks again for letting me visit so early in the morning. Get well soon, Ashiya.”

“Not at all. Thank you for all the lovely things you brought over. Now, no funny business before you take Ms. Sasaki back home, Your Demonic Highness.”

I blush in response to your comment, a smile planted on my face.

“What are you, my wife?”

I glare at my roommate.

“She has loyally served you, my liege, in both personal and business matters. It is only right that you repay the debt with equal kindness.”

“Pfft...yeah. Anyway, see you.”

I wear a hangdog look as I go downstairs. 15.

I follow behind. 12.

I watch for a moment before shutting the door.

I put your bag in Dullahan’s front basket before we set off to your house.

“...Too bad you don’t have a seat or a carrier on the back of a bicycle, Maou.”

“Dullahan, you mean.”

It amazes me that you still insist on calling it that.

“But, hey, you can’t expect that much by a used fixie, right?”

“Well, it’s still too bad.”

I flash you a chiding smile.

“Yeah, but if you sat on the back of this thing, I could be cited for upward of twenty thousand yen, you know? I’m skirting the law already when I use an umbrella in the rain.”

I roll my eyes at you.

“I know _that_. I didn’t say I wanted to do it or anything. I kind of meant something else.”

“Mm?”

“Oh, nothing. But anyway, once we reach Sasazuka station, we can just take Koshu-Kaido Road toward Hatagaya.”

I begin walking by myself half a step ahead of you.

“H-hey, uh, Chi?”

“Mm? What is it?”

I swivel my face behind me.

“So, uh...thanks for giving me such a lavish breakfast. It was great.”

“Oh, it’s nothing compared to Suzuno. But I appreciate the compliment.”

“Listen, uh, are your parents cool with this?”

“With what?”

Your response is enough to stop me dead for a moment.

“Oh, uh...I mean, you know, Chi. A girl like you, hanging out on a place like we’ve got? Did your parents mind much?”

“Oh, that?”

I put a finger to my chin as I consider my answer.

“Well, they didn’t say anything, anyway. I told them exactly where I was going, and my mom gave me a bunch of pointers while I cooked, too. Mother-approved, I guess you could say!”

That seems unlikely to me.

“Wh-what about your dad?”

“Well, I kinda didn’t tell him where I was going the first time. It’s fine today, though.”

“Oh. Just fine, huh?”

“Mm-hmm. He actually cried this morning, too, like ‘Oh, you’ve finally got someone you want to give a home-cooked meal to’ and stuff.”

That’s even _more_ unlikely.

“Oh, that reminds me. What’re you gonna do for your lunch bento today? Suzuno’s out with Emi right now, right?”

“What am I gonna do...? Well, I didn’t really think about it.”

“Well...if you’d like, would you like me to make one?”

“...For me?”

I stare at you sourly.

“Would I have asked you if I was making it for for someone else?”

“Well, no, but...hey, why not? I’m sure Ashiya would be happier with me eating whatever you make instead of living off junk food all the time.”

My sulky glare immediately transforms into a very bright smile.

“Ooh, great! I’ll make sure it’s nutritious and stuff, then. Wouldn’t want Ashiya to worry too much about you!”

Please tell me you at least get the meaning of this gesture.

There’s no need to phrase it like that. Yes, I do.

“Well, about that, Chi...”

“Yes?”

“Don’t we...you know, worry you at all?”

“Oh...you mean, you guys?”

I scope out our surroundings.

No one else seems to be around.

“You mean about how you’re demon aliens and stuff?”

Aliens? Well I guess, that...would be correct...

You haven’t thought about it that way before now?

Obviously not. And quite frankly I don’t know how to feel about it.

I completely turn around to face you.

“Yeah, kinda...”

I'm kind of taken aback that you just went and said it like that.

“Well...I guess I’d be lying if I said it didn’t. Maybe you guessed it when you saw me with Emi this morning, but we like to text each other every now and then. So I know a little bit about what you were up to back on Ente Isla or whatever.”

I take a light breath.

“But before I kew that, Maou, I kinda starting liking you, so...”

My eyes shoot upward as the words pour out of your mouth.

I laugh nervously as I watch you.

“Oh, you don’t have to look at me like that. You must’ve understood what Albert told you, right?”

“Uh, no, uh...”

That explains a lot.

“Don’t just stand there in the middle of the street like that. There’s a car coming.”

I scurry back to the edge of the street before the vehicle passes.

“But did you notice yet, Maou? The reason why I’ve been so distant these past two months?”

I’m betting on his answer being a _no_.

I don’t think anyone’s willing to bet against you on this one.

“Not...really, no.”

“When we went to work, right after you fought Urushihara, you asked me if I wanted my memories erased.”

“Y-yeah...”

I take a deep breath. The corners of my mouth are turned up in a warm, soft smile.

“Well, I don’t want to forget about the people I like. Ever. No matter what.”

I swallow.

I giggle a bit in response.

“You don’t have to act all shocked to death every time, Maou. Are you really trying to conquer the world, or what?”

Our world conquest seems to have been put on a back-burner for the moment.

“Uh...well, I mean...”

I stop walking to think this over.

“At least keep walking! Yusa tried to stop me at first. She said she didn’t want me to regret anything, falling in love with you. But this was my doing in the first place, you know? I started liking you, and if I want to stop, I’ll do that on my own terms.”

“Chi...”

I really don’t know any other way to respond to this.

“So, you know, even if you see me as nothing but the new girl at work, that’s all right. That, and me liking you... Those are two different things.”

Your words have rendered me silent and frozen.

Something that would serve as a terrible example for the minions you left behind in Ente Isla.

“...This is exactly why you humans can be so scary sometimes.”

“Exactly. And you should be particularly careful around women. Men get the wrong idea a lot about this, but if you mess with us, you’ll pay for it. Big-time.”

“I’ll make a note of that.”

I chuckle to myself and nod.

I confidently stride forward. Finally, you let me finish confessing my love to him. No NPCs, random lightening strikes, or other events that would somehow stopped me in my tracks.

“Well, today’s your first day as shift supervisor, right? Good luck with that.”

“Yeah, right. I’ll try my best not to have my entire paycheck garnished.”

“You are a proud artisan, Sadao. Taking on such heavy responsibility...and blessed with such a loyal crew, no less.”

I should have known that was too easy.


	19. Chapter 19

You knew she was following us, didn’t you?

Of course, I’m the GM, it’s my job to know these things.

“Exactly! I’ll have to try my best not to drag you down! ...Um...”

“Hmm?”

“Huh?”

I’m standing right next to Maou.

“You are truly loved, Sadao.”

“S-S-Su...”

“Suzuno?!”

I leap back from you.

I do the same.

“Wh-when did you show up, how much did you hear, why didn’t you say anything, why are you here, didn’t you leave _before_ us?!”

My nose is positively glowing red at this point.

“I caught up to you barely a minute ago. My ears picked up the conversation beginning with ‘even if you see me as nothing but the new girl at work.’ I hesitated to speak up because even from afar, I could tell this was an intimate conversation. We did indeed leave early, but I realized I had left my belongings at home, so Emi proceeded on ahead while I returned to fetch them.”

“Nnnnhh!!!!”

My entire body is now shining dark red.

“Worry not. Witnessing the way you treated Sadao this morning it was plain to surmise your feelings, Chiho.”

“S-S-S-S-Suzuno?! You’re saying that on purpose! In front of _him_!”

“On purpose how? Any way is your face such a bright shade of crimson.”

“That’s what happens when you _say_ stuff like that, I’m really embarrassed, what are you even _thinking _?!”__

Speaking of oblivious.

“I’m not talking about that! Maybe your right, but it’s still embarrassing to me! Ugh! I mean... Ugh!”

“Chi, Chi, calm down a little...”

Like that’s going to work.

“In fact, Chiho, I find it quite virtuous and attractive, how clearly and blissfully honest you are with your own heart... no matter it may be pointed toward.”

“Um, that wasn’t a knock on me just now, was it?”

I let out a voiceless scream.

How exactly does that work?

I snatch Dullahan away from you and stomp on the pedals at full force.

“Agh! Hey! Wait! Chi!”

I extend my hand towards you.

I execute a tailslide around the corner and am now out of sight.

I glare at Suzuno.

“Mm. Quite loved indeed.”

“Esh. You didn’t have to prod her like that. She’s going through a lot at her age.”

I hang my head in disappointment as I scratch my forehead.

“Ughh... Hopefully Chi won’t get in an accident, zooming off like that.”

My eyes fly open in response.

“...That is a surprise.”

“What is? The fact I’m worried about someone else?”

“If I may be so rude as to say so.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t think you’re the first to say that. Man, do the folks I know really have _that_ little trust in me?”

“What do you think it means to be loved by someone?”

I knit my brows.

“What, are you running a survey or something?”

“No... I meant nothing profound by it.”

“And you expect me to believe _that_ after what you saw? ...Well, it’s hard to say, just having it asked like that. I don’t just want to brush it off or whatever, but if Chi trusts in me that much...and, more to the point, if her parents do...then I guess I’ll have to be just as sincere with them. Not that I know what to _say_ to anyone yet.”

I’m looking at you like some sort of exotic animal I have never seen before.

“Why’re you looking at me like that? ...Did I say something weird, or...?”

“Huh? Ah, ah...ah, no, n-not at all. It was merely a touch surprising to me.”

“ _What_ is?! And, look, shouldn’t you regroup with Emi anyway?”

“...Ah. Yes. Right.”

I shake my head.

“I’m sure she’s over at Sasazuka station. Lemme show you a shortcut.”

“A...?”

I seem to be caught off guard again.

I ignore it.

You seem to be good at that.

At what?

Ignoring social cues.

“You see that alleyway? Walk a little ways down and you’ll reach the Bosatu Street shopping area. Make a left there and follow the line of shops down, and you’ll wind up right in front of the station.”

“Er...yes. Certainly. Thank you.”

“Also, if you wanna find a job, you’re probably gonna need a phone for people to contact you with. I know you don’t have much scratch to work with right now, but you better buy a cell phone ASAP. There’s a shop or two by the station, but if you don’t see anything you like, I’m sure Emi knows where you could go downtown. Anyway, have a good one.”

“...Yes. Thank you.”

I take one more look down the path Chiho took, before turning my back on Suzuno and heading back to the Devil’s Castle.

I watch you go.

I turn back after a few steps.

“Good luck finding a decent job! Try not to let all the crowds freak you out downtown.”

I walk off without waiting for you to respond.

I stand there for a few moments, finding myself unable to move.


	20. Chapter 20

“Did you find your bag?”

As I say this, I walk up to you.

I nod, still in a slight haze.

“Yes...yes, safe and sound. I apologize for making you wait.”

“Not at all, Is something up? You look a little off.”

“No...but...are we boarding the...um, train? Right now?”

Why’d you make train a question? I nod.

“Yep. It’s only one station from Sasazuka to Shinjuku, but it’s still kind of far to walk. Oh, and watch you don’t take the train to Motowaya, either. That’s two extra stops, and it puts you way at the far edge of Shinjuku, too. Do you have a passcard or anything? You’ll have to buy a regular ticket if you don’t, but setting up a fare card now will make it a lot easier in the future.”

“Um...yes. About that.”

I take a look around our surroundings, plainly confused.

“If I may be honest with you, I have yet to board a train in my life.”

“...What?”

Where the hell is your character from?

“And what is this _fair card_ I keep hearing about? Is it used to gain access to the market fair?”

“What?”

“Hmm? I...apologize if I just said something strange.”

“Uh, _strange_ isn’t the... Um. Well. Anyway, let’s just buy a ticket, all right? I’ll explain what a passcard is later. Tickets are...”

I’m standing statuelike in front of a ticket vending machine.

“...Um, can I ask an honest question? How the heck did you make it to Sasazuka?”

“Well, I apologize if I am somewhat lacking in local knowledge. I used a Gate to come right down upon Sasazuka.”

“Oh, right, that makes...”

_What_?!

“...What was that?”

“I said, I came down directly upon Sasazuka through the use of a Gate and I have been busy assembling my new identity in the city, so until I grow more familiar with city life here, I’m afraid that I...”

“W-wait! Wait!”

I give a close look to our surroundings.

They appear to simply be a normal train station, filled with normal morning traffic.

“A-are you from Ente Isla?!”

“Had you not noticed?!”

How could I have been expected to?!

“You never breathed a word of it to me!”

“But you said it yourself! You said you were after the Devil King!”

You even commented on the limited number of relevant means by which one might introduce a new character into the party!

“What?!”

“I was a tad surprised, as I never thought you would use that name in front of the man himself. But the you advised me not to take any rash action. That I should ‘keep my distance’ from him, or I would be unhappy!”

“Whaaaaaat?!”

“I have been through a great number of trials and tribulations in my life, but if it is the Hero advising me to stand down, then stand down I shall. However, even if I pulled up stakes at the very moment, I had no place left to go. Thus I asked you for assistance - assistance you promised to give. Along with your contact information, no?”

“Whaaaaaaaat?!”

“So did you _not_ say that because you knew of my true colours?!”

In which case why _did_ you say that?

“How the hell was _that_ going to show me who you really were?!”

Well...

Quiet! I’m curious to see how this plays out naturally.

“You found nothing at all strange about it?! This dainty young girl, freshly moved into her new apartment, briskly meddling with the lives of the three men who live next door? You thought it was a perfectly everyday occurrence?!”

Well, _no_. But I assumed it was license taken in order to really make Suzuno a part of our adventuring party! ...Such that it is. As for Emi...

“Yes! I did! And having you act like I didn’t is really pissing me off!”

“Then what did you possibly mean when you asked if I was ‘aiming for’ the Devil King?!”

“Huh? That... I mean...”

I assumed Suzuno was in love with him! That’s why I asked if she was aiming for him too! I was referencing _Chiho_ , not me! That’s also why I commented on limited means of entering the party. You needed a reason for the sweet, proper neighbour girl to start hanging out with the rest of the cast. The heart pattern you put in the bento you gave to Maou really didn’t help my assumptions. Like, at _all_! Plus...

“W-well, why did _you_ ask me if I was in a close relationship with him?!”

“Because I had word that you fought alongside the Devil King!”

My eyes shoot open at your words. I’m guessing Olba found a way to transmit some news. Since I’d like to hope that my allies wouldn’t be spreading that report without a little more context and detail.

It was Olba, trying to call for help.

Great.

“You have got to be kidding me! We had a common enemy! There was nothing I could do about it besides defeat him while the Devil King was in the same location! And anyone who calls it ‘fighting alongside’ him is making a terrible, terrible mistake!”

Looked like fighting alongside from my position.

Shut up, you’re not helping.

It’s not like she can _hear_ me, even if that _was_ meant to be in character.

“So, what, you thought I joined sides with the Devil King so I could get revenge against the Church?! Is that why you dressed up all funny and attacked me at the convenience store yesterday?!"

Why are you so hung up on that being me? Because I swear to you, it was not. I stare quizzically at you.

“A ‘convenience store’? How does one sell convenience, exactly? I am not sure what you mean.”

“Oh, if _you_ don’t, how do you think _I’m_ handling this right now, huh?! Are you pulling that act on purpose, or are you really that stupid?!”

Hey, first time that question has been levied at someone who isn’t me.

I cup my face with one hand.

“I was attacked, all right? At the store! On the day I gave you my info! By someone from Ente Isla! And not to defend the Devil King, but it wasn’t a demon, because whoever it was had the power to cancel out my holt sword! Which means it had to be you...!”

“W-wait a moment, please. Me, attacking you? I have done no such thing! I knew full well that you were Emilia, the Hero! I knew the strength you possessed as a knight of the Church! And while I am not wholly useless in battle, I was hardly so foolish as to wage a duel I had but little chance of winning!”

Again, you’re attacker took a paintball to the face, and I’m not wearing any makeup! Or perfume!

I’m not sure I trust you.

If she were your attacker Suzuno would look like an orange panda right now. It’s fairly plain to you that she is not.

I resist the urge to shout Suzuno down more.

“...Well, look, I’m sorry if I’m a little slow on the uptake. Cam you clue me in? Who are you, and what’re you trying to do just waltzing around the Devil’s Castle like that?!”

I look around just to make certain Maou or Ashiya isn’t spying on me.

You can’t see either of them.

“...My true name is Crestia Bell, chief inquisitor of the Reconciliation Panel. I apologize if we experienced a breakdown in communications earlier. So, once again, I ask you. Could I ask for your help, and your cooperation, Emilia Justina, as the Hero of Ente Isla? I promise I have not come here to hurt you.”

I bow my head, exposing a bright red hairpin with a floral pattern modeled after the cross-bearing family of flowers.

Why did mention the design of your hairpin? Or the hairpin at all for that matter?

Setting the groundwork for something. And putting emphasis on why I should allow it.

Obviously you already know about this ‘something’. I look up at the station clock.

“Let’s save this for after we reach Shinjuku. I don’t want to be late for work.”

With that, I set off for the turnstile.

“Ah...um, what?”

I’m staring google-eyed at your back, unable to comprehend how you can put your Japanese employer before Ente Isla.

Now just imagine what it’s been like to be _me_ this entire time.

“Look, this is just the kind of country Japan is, okay? Let’s get moving.”

I place my fare card on the sensor and walk through the turnstile.

“W-wait a - _ngh_!”

I turn around at your odd groan.

The tip of my kimono’s belt got caught in the turnstile as I tried to follow you through.

“L-et me go! I-I cannot afford to be stymied here...”


	21. Chapter 21

So I’d guess she’s a part of the investigations into Olba’s disappearance, but how did Suzuno end up finding all on us on Earth anyway?

I was looking through some papers Olba left behind, when I discovered the true fate of the Hero and the Devil King. From there I used sonar pulses to track down the energy of the Holy Silver in your holy sword. I also acquired a fragment of the Devil King’s horn that you sliced off during your battle on the Central Continent.

Oh, yeah. I’d forgotten you’d done that.

So had I, honestly.

Thankfully, I didn’t.

Well remembering obscure details like that is kind of your _job_ , so...

Anyway, using this fragment I wove a special sonar pulse capable of honing in on the Devil King’s magic. I spread these far and wide, trying to discover his location.

And did you?

Well, yes, I did discover a concentration of his force in a single small area, but Olba’s message reached me before this information did. It was full of white noise, but I was able to learn that he was trapped on an alien planet with no ability to open a Gate and seeking help. But it was what he said next that really kicked my character into action.

What did he say?

_Emilia the Hero formed a team with, and fought alongside, the Devil King._

I have to say, you’ve thought this over quite a bit.

I wanted to work Suzuno into the mythos of this campaign as well as possible. So I ended up talking to the GM a lot about the backstory and world in Ente Isla. And I have to say it’s a lot more robust than I would have guessed from sitting in with you last campaign. I can see why the GM was so upset that you just up and left.

Thank you.


	22. Chapter 22

Hey! Thesis done?

It’s out for external review. So I’m going to have to cut out again when it comes back, but for now I play again. So what’s happened while I was away?

We got a new PC.

Oh? You managed to finish your character?

Yes. She’s a member of the Ente Islan clergy who discovered the other characters while investigating Olba’s disappearance.

Cool! So what’s happening right now?

Well she’s just revealed her true identity to Emi and they’re discussing what to do next while also simultaneously introducing her to modern Japanese life.

Do you want me to work you into this somehow? Since you only have a limited time to play?

Nah. Emi has to come to work eventually.

Just after this, actually.

Alright then, just carry on from where you left off.

“I served the Church in its missionary arm...and now it pains me to think I considered myself an expert at analyzing the ways of foreign lands. This nation, Japan, is far beyond my feeble understanding... There is not a single city similar to this on Ente Isla...”

I am nothing short of shattered.

I’d say. During your trip you’ve tried to wave a paper train ticket over a touch sensor, tripped over yourself at the top of an escalator, and you replied politely to a station announcement. All before even getting _on_ the train.

Really? I hope the GM gave you tons of experience for that.

I did.

Good.

“So...what were we talking about, then...?”

“I know you haven’t seen a TV before, but I didn’t think you’d seriously shout out, ‘Ohhhh. There’s a man inside that thin board on the...’”

“Please, stop talking about that!”

I clap my hand on the table to make a point.

“The document I had at hand indicated something large and book-shaped! Then I wouldn’t have been so taken aback! One can hide a person inside a box easily enough!”

“The shape of it doesn’t really matter...and, just so we’re one the same page here, there isn’t a guy inside.”

I take a sip of my iced coffee.

“What kind of ‘documentation’ did you have anyway?”

Because whatever you studied obviously didn’t grant many insights into modern Japanese society.

“I learned that the kimono was a traditional Japanese garment, do I studied the resources where they appeared most often. I think you call them ‘samurai dramas’? I also viewed several long running documentaries depicting modern Japanese life. I thought I could trust them! Some dated from this era I understand people call ‘the fifties’!”

“Well, that explains all the goofy anachronisms, I guess.”

Why'd you decide to do that, anyway?

Well, all your characters had adjusted so well, I wanted to play a character who didn’t adjust to modern life so well. And the idea precipitated from there.

“Hey, but which samurai drama did you like best?”

“Well...I do like the ones that star wandering ronin, like _Oarashi Montaro_ or _Lone Lion and Cub_ or _Three for the Slash!_ Things like _Vice-Shogun Mito_ , or _Maniac Shogun_... They did not touch the same chord with me.”

“...Oh.”

You did that on purpose didn’t you?

Yep, I’d rather focus at the story at hand rather than try and make one up for a fictional samurai drama. Because Emi would want to talk about them if I liked the same ones.

...Yeah, she would. I guess this is as good a way to keep her focused on the plot as any.


	23. Chapter 23

“So...if we can go back to Sasazuka for a moment... What does the head inquisitor of the Reconciliation Panel want with me? What could possess you to live next door to the Devil King?”

“Well, if I could summarize for you...”

I lean forward.

“My first goal was to ascertain whether you were alive or not. As I followed Olba Meiyer’s trail, however, the only clues I unearthed were related to the Devil King, and his activities in this world. Thus, I reasoned that I kept a close watch on the Devil King himself...”

“The Hero would show up before long. I sure walked into _that_ mousetrap.”

“There is no way for me to express my sorrow for the deplorable crimes Olba Meiyer committed. Judging by the way you acted around him before knowing, I, too, was Ente Islan, I can only conclude that his tale of you forging a pact with the Devil King was a complete fabrication. His actions do not reflect the collective position of the Church. I, at least, hope to serve as your humble ally.”

I lean in even closer.

“Now, allow me to dance around the topic no longer. I want you to defeat Satan, the Devil King, and return to Ente Isla with me. I want to to prove you are alive, expose Olba’s crimes, and guide the Church back to the path it must traverse.”

“No.”

“...That was rather fast!”

My elbows those traction on the table, causing me to almost spill my tea.

“You could at least give it a modicum of thought!”

“No. I’m not working for anyone from the Church any longer.”

“But you promised to work alongside me!”

“That doesn’t count. I made that promise before I knew who you were.”

“You care so little about your position, about your honourable reputation within Ente Isla? Why not bring it back to what it _should_ be?!”

“Oh, like _I_ care about what the Church and all the other kingdoms think.”

I stare out the café window as I brush you off.

I follow your gaze.

“What is...?”

“Could you understand that I’m not exactly welcoming you with open arms, if you consider that you work for a group whose boss triggered a collapse in an underground tunnel packed with innocent people, just to kill me and the Devil King? You know Olba’s here, right?”

I look at you, then back out the window before nodding.

“I had no idea he had gone so far...”

“Olba teamed up with Lucifer to wreck this nation, just for the sake of killing me. Emeralda and Albert know, too. They were there. In fact, you could ask Lucifer yourself later. You know that’s who Urushihara is, right?”

Of course I do. Unlike the other two, he looks pretty much exactly the same. That’s the reason I looked upset when he first introduced himself. Suzuno was mentally prepared to see Alciel with the Devil King, as they supposedly perished during the same battle, but Lucifer was reported to have died back when you retook the Western Continent. Seeing him alive was something of a shock.

Olba didn’t mention that at all, I’m guessing.

Why would he? That wouldn’t exactly make the Church want to come over here and rescue him.

“That’s why I thought you were that attacker yesterday, too. But even if you weren’t, I have zero intention to work in tandem with someone from the Reconciliation Panel.”

“...Why?”

“Because the Hero is the one charged with slaying the Devil King.”

“Then let me join you! I traveled here with the intent of slaying him myself, if I had to.”

“That is my job, and mine alone. Don’t meddle in this.”

“How could you say such things...?”

You’re starting to sound like that player who prevents the rest of the party from helping fight a boss encounter because they want to horde all the experience.

“Do I really have to spell it out for you? You _are_ a higher-up in the Reconci-well, really the Council of Inquisitors, right?”

I fall silent.

“Listen, I don’t know what you’ve done up to this point. So I do apologize if this is hurting your feelings. “But, I don’t want anyone taking me defeating the Devil King and using it for their own gain. That, at least, I hope you understand.”

I check the clock on the wall.

It’s getting close to your work shift.

“That, and I don’t know why you’re keeping them fed, but I just want to warn you - if you keep trying to mess around with them in your cute little ways like that, they’re gonna spot you out. He’s _still_ the Devil King, you know.”

“...I appreciate the warning.”

“I’m going to kill the Devil King for my _own_ sake. So just stay away from him, all right? Go back to Ente Isla.”

Please don’t take that advice. I’ve finally made this ridiculous situation work.

What makes you think I would?

This is my reflex reaction at this point.

“And rest assured, I’m never going to let any of them set foot in our homeland again.”

I pick up the check. Then I stand up, and take a wadded up magazine out of my bag.

“Of course, I’m sure you’re still working on your own itinerary. So take this. It’s a free help-wanted magazine. I picked up a copy at the station just now, but there’s lots of others just like it, so try looking around a bit.”

I look blankly at Emi, then at the logo on the corner of the magazine’s cover.

“You’ll want to read that if you plan on staying in this world a while. Learn a bit about what people do to earn a living in this world. Your speech and your clothing are just too much of a mismatch, you know? Try researching fashion a little. Watch people around you. I need to go to work. You can get back home yourself, right?”

I pay the bill and leave the café. Then I put one of my hands on the forehead and heave a heavy sigh.

“I _hope_ that brought the message across.”

On my way to work, I notice you standing outside the café.

“Oh! Hey, Emi!”

I turn towards your voice.

“...Oh. Morning, Rika.”

“A little morning coffee? That’s a rarity.”

“Yeah, pretty much. I had to meet up with someone I know.”

“Ooh! A man, maybe? You pretty much never talk about your personal life, so...”

“Oh, come on. It was just a girl.”

We walk together to work, exchanging small talk.


	24. Chapter 24

“I...I’m really sorry about this!”

I greet you with Dullahan in tow. I’m bowing my head, clearly nervous about looking you in the eye.

I laugh it off, and park Dullahan out back before joining you inside the restaurant.

The restaurant barely has any customers in it, despite it being right around the time of the lunch rush.

“...Huh?”

I scowl as I look around the dining area.

Kisaki is standing behind the counter beaming. The worker on the morning shift behind her has a face white as a sheet.

“Um, good-”

“It’s been dead.”

“-morning... Pardon?”

“Six hours since we opened, and we’re eating Sentucky’s traffic dust.”

“Huh?”

“Our customer numbers are down eighty percent from yesterday. I’m starting to think those bastards at SFC are conspiring against us. Why...? Why do I have to back to the office for training starting today?!”

Her smile remains unflagging as she bellows into the dining area. The morning part-timers shake in fear.

“It gives me nightmares to even imagine it, but if our customer stats keep up this pace the entire day...”

Her death stare sweeps across the entire MgRonald’s crew, including Maou and Chiho.

“You want to be sent to Greenland? Hmm? Are you listening, Shift Supervisor Sadao Maou?”

“No ma’am.”

She grabs your shoulders from across the counter, eyes glinting like a predator out for blood.

“Then you have my full permission to do _whatever it takes. Destroy_ SFC.”

“Yes, ma’am!”

I salute you in military fashion.

I join in.

As does the rest of the crew. And just to clarify, ‘whatever it takes’ means whatever common sense allows in terms of ways to improve MgRonald sales. Don’t physically wipe the SFC off the map.

Yeah, I got that from Ms. Kisaki.

Good, just making certain. It’s not like I haven’t had to deal with you doing unexpected things before.


	25. Chapter 25

So what are our sales figures like now?

Still down 70% from the day before. Anything else you’d like to try?

There’s really not a lot else I can try at the moment.

“Well, great. If this is what we get on day one...”

The dining space isn’t completely devoid of customers at least.

There’s no way the numbers we have are going to appease Ms. Kisaki.

The automatic door shuffles open, revealing a new customer.

“Welcome!!”

He makes a beeline for the counter.

“Hello. I apologize for interrupting you, but could I speak to the manager?”

What does this customer look like? Because I’m guessing he’s somehow important.

It’s a small, thin man in slightly oversized sunglasses, wearing a suit and carrying a briefcase.

So he looks like a kid dressed up as a mob boss, then?

I walk up to this strange man at the counter.

“I apologize, sir, but our manager isn’t here today. My name is Maou, and I’m the current shift supervisor. If I’m able to, I’d be happy to handle any questions you may have.”

The man lifts his eyebrows.

“Ah, Sadao Maou? Superb. I’ve heard the rumours about you. Despite the name, they say you are a diligent worker, a superior talent, a thoughtful leader, and above all, a font of human kindness.”

“Er, yes...I appreciate that, sir.”

You notice that this man is covered by an oddly strong scent of mint.

I don’t suppose you’re going to mention what he meant by ‘despite the name’?

Where’s the fun in just telling you? You like figuring things out, right?

“I apologize, but have we met somewhere before?”

The small man cracks a wide smile.

“No, we haven’t. However, I have been aware of you for a very long time before now.”

Oh, he’s one of _those_ customers, is he?

The man brightens up, as if suddenly remembering something.

“Ah, but look at me. Here, allow me to introduce myself.”

He’s takes out a business card from an inside pocket and presents it to you.

I nod to him, and accept the card with both hands.

It states that this man is the manager of the Sentucky Fried Chicken.

“The...manager of Sentucky Fried Chicken?”

“My name is Mitsuki Sarue. I thought I would introduce myself to our new neighbours.”

He smiles lightly and scratches his head.

“I apologize that I failed to pay you a visit earlier. We’ve just been so busy with everything you know. Hatagaya is such a wonderful neighbourhood isn’t it? Nestled right between a business and residential zone. Great crowds of potential customers. Lovely women everywhere. I must praise MgRonald’s great foresight in establishing a foothold here first!”

“...Huh?”

“But regardless, I finally found a spare moment just now during our thriving opening-day business to pay a visit. And a good thing, too, since it I am not intruding at all at the moment.”

“...Yes, we are a tad slow at the moment. But all the more opportunity to get to know our neighbours better, of course.”

My customer service driven smile remains on my face.

“Oh, not at all! Our shared customer base is always looking for the nest novelty, you know. I’m sure things will be back to normal in no time.”

“I would certainly hope so, sir. In fact, I look forward to great success for both of us here by the station. And I’m sure that, when she comes back, our manager would be delighted to repay your visit with one of her own.”

This response seems to take Sarue by surprise.

“Well...! I suppose you certainly aren’t the person I know of after all.”

He bows his head as he continues.

“It is a shame I couldn’t meet the beautiful manager I’ve heard so much about, but while I’m here, could I perhaps order a value meal to go? ...Mm?"

His eyes move over to Chiho.

“My, how pretty.”

“Huh?”

Sarue all but teleports himself in front of Chiho.

“Such a bright future this fetching young lady must have. It would simply delight me to purchase a meal prepared by you. You and those dainty hands of yours!”

I make a very obvious grimace before beginning to open my mouth.

“Sasaki? Would you mind taking this customer’s order, please?”

“...Certainly.”

Why are we agreeing to this?

It’s all in the name of good customer service.


	26. Chapter 26

I’m still sulking even though Sarue is long gone.

“ _Someone’s_ looking kinda peeved”

“Why shouldn’t I be? That Sarue guy obviously came in here to pick on us. Doesn’t all that junk he said bother you at all, Maou?”

“Well, if it bothered you that much, it just shows you’ve grown to the point where you take real pride in your work.”

Or it could be that I get annoyed really easily. Or don’t like it when older men randomly start hitting on me.

“You’re not just here for the pay in other words. I’m a lot happier about that, myself.”

You’re apparently going with your explanation.

“..Ugh.”

I tighten my pout even further.

“You’re so dense all the time, but whenever something like this happens, it’s always like _this_ with you.”

I turn my face away from you.

“If you let yourself say angry at a difficult customer, that’s just bringing yourself down to his level. We just have to stick to our guns, you know? That’s what makes it all work out, and it let’s you keep your pride, too. As long as they’re paying us, a customer’s a customer.”

That... actually sounds exactly like something a manager would say.

I rub my nose in an attempt to amplify my air of authority.

“How was that? Assistant manager-like of me, huh?”

That, however, does not. You should have stuck with _my_ validation, rather than asking for Chiho’s. I giggle.

“Yeah, until you said _that_.”

“I guess I should apologize for not stepping in when he got all flirty, though. That must’ve sucked.”

I bow lightly to you.

“Like I care what that ankle-biter had to say to me.”

I shake my head.

“Ankle-biter! That’s a good one.”

I clap my approval.

The rest of the crew nods and laughs.

“Man, I’d really hate to work for a manager like, that though. Is he even treating this business seriously? With that kind of cologne, he’s probably gonna get a pile of complaints.”

“Do you think he deals with customers with those glasses on, too?"

“Yeah, well, maybe he’s trying to avoid UV rays. Ashiya mentioned something like that to me once. Or maybe he’s got eye problems. Kinda hard to tell these days.”

...I suppose you could call it eye problems...

What?

Nothing, nothing.

“Right. Let’s get back to some serious selling.”

“You got it! I am not gonna let ‘em win!”

I lead the crew in a round of cheering.

“Okay! Bring ‘em on! One hundred, two hundred, I don’t care! It’s time to do some _work_!!”

“That’s the spirit, Chi. We’ll get some more concrete intel on SFC later on today, so let’s keep this machine running.”

“Concrete intel?”

“Yep. Gotta make use of the tools at hand. Or your faithful generals, anyway. Besides, when I told him my salary was in jeopardy, he had no choice but to say yes.”

Curse me and my valuing us actually having some form of financial security.


	27. Chapter 27

I hesitate.

“I kinda have someplace to go.”

That’s not very sophisticated way of avoiding telling her what you plan on doing tonight.

“Oh? That’s too bad. Something with your friend form this morning, maybe? Well, lemme know when you’re free, ‘cause I still have this Takano Fruit Bar coupon to use, okay?”

“...Sure, I’ll find a free day pretty soon. Sorry.”

We exit our building.

I’m standing just outside the building, apparently waiting for you.

“Hmm? Hey, isn’t that the girl you were with?”

I can still always deny everything and dash off you know.

“Emi! Have you finally completed your duties?”

And now you can’t. I run up to you.

I turn dejectedly towards you.

I’m now wearing a water-print kimono and a cross-shaped glass hairpin. I have too bags in my hand, one from the Kakui Fashion Square building and from a DEF Mart. I now have a tote bag bearing a Japanese-style goldfish print, with a balloon tied to it. Inside you can see a plastic mineral-water bottle and a Moonbucks Coffee tumbler.

How were you able to shop that much? Where did you get the money?

“You bought all that, and you _still_ couldn’t pick anything besides a kimono?”

“As a member of the Church missionary force, it is part of my duty to examine economic trends in our areas of operation. Besides, I noticed multiple women in similar kimonos passing by.”

“...You had that much money on you?”

That’s what I’m _saying_.

“I did bring a sizable number of, ah, financial instruments along with me. I sold several examples to a store known as Mugi-hyo.”

hat did you sell? And where did you sell it?

Why do you want to know?

I might want to buy it.

What would Rika want with Ente Islan _anything_ , it’s not like she knows about it, _at all_. I continue by taking a pass holder out of my bag.

“And look! I purchased one of your ‘fare cards’! I, er, ‘charged’? Yes! I did that! All by myself!”

I flash the card at Emi.

“...Well, good job.”

I don’t know what other sort of congratulations you’re expecting here...

“Is this your friend, Emi?”

“Uhm...Yeah, pretty much, I suppose.”

“Well, you don’t sound too sure.”

“How wonderful to meet you. I am Suzuno Kamazuki. I have lived in Tokyo for only a short period of time, but Emi has been an enormous help to me.”

“Oh. Neat! My name’s Rika Suzuki. I work with her, as you probably guessed. So, Kamazuki, did you move to Eifukucho?”

“No, my residence is in Sasazuka.”

“Sasazuka? Really? But you’re in Eifukucho, right, Emi?”

“Y-yeah, but...”

I try to signal my trepidation to Suzuno with my eyes.

I’m looking at Rika, and so don’t notice you.

“Emi struck up a conversation with me not long after I moved here. She was visiting the neighbours next door.”

“Oh, I see...but, wait, what were you doin’ in Sasazuka, Emi?”

I turn my eyes back towards you.

Seems a bit late _now_.

“So, the reason I waited here, Emi, is because I had another request.”

“...What are you going on about?”

Are you _trying_ to give Rika the wrong impression or something?

Doesn’t bother me at all if you are.

“...Oh, uh, sorry if I’m being a buttinsky or whatever. Should I get going?”

Yes.

“No, not at all. It is a simple enough request. I was hoping, Emi, that we could go and visit Sadao’s workplace together.”

...You totally are.

“Sadao? Have I heard that name somewhere before?”

“No, really, what are you...?”

“I want to see this man, this Sadao Maou, at work. I know you bade me not to approach him, but I am not the sort of woman to acquiesce so readily to that.”

I grab my head, knowing all too well how Rika’s going to take this.

I’m happy to oblige, then.

“Oh, right! Sadao Maou’s the guy you’re friends with, right?”

“See...? Now you’ve done it...”

“You talked about him when you stayed at my place, remember? Ooh, this isn’t some kind of competition I’m listenin’ in on, is it?!”

“Rika, no, hang on a...”

I don’t think there’s any stopping her at this point.

“Well, hang on, hang on! Listen, if you don’t mind me speaking up as a woman witnessing all of this...and I know I’m being a _total_ buttinsky at this point...but something like this isn’t going to be solved by just one of you alone. So if you want to really nip this in the bud for good, then I think we need to get this Maou guy in the same room. And yes, I know it’ll be awkward at first, but it’ll save everyone a lot of grief later, you know?”

“No, Rika, it’s nothing like...”

“...Indeed. Perhaps you are correct.”

_No_! Why is Suzuno going along with this?

She’s only going to be here for a limited time, right? I wanted to give her something to do. Plus, I don’t get why you’re so worked up.

I’ve had one too many major misunderstandings during this campaign.

“Hey!”

“So where is he, huh?”

“I understand he works at the MgRonald in Hatagaya.”

“Heeeyyyyy!!!”

“Ah, chill out, Emi. Hatagaya’s right by here, isn’t it? Well, the sooner the better, I say!”

“I, I _am_ chill! Rika, there’s really no need for...”

“It’ll be fine, okay? Just calm down. Remember, I’m on your side here! Oh, and don’t you worry, either! A good judge needs to be fair and impartial, you know.”

I smile at Suzuno, and hold out my hand for her to shake.

I do so.

“Hey, stop doing this without any input from me! I’m not going anywhere!”

“...Are you sure?”

“...You are _sure_ of that?”

“Nnnn...!”

Fine, you win.

“...Well! Shall we, then? I’ll step aside during the actual proceedings, of course. But now that I’m a total buttinsky, I gotta make up for it as much as I can, right? Besides, I’m an expert at this kinda thing.”

I begin to walk on ahead.

With Rika’s back turned, I give Suzuno the most predatorial glare that I can.

“If I asked you to come along myself, I was afraid you would turn a deaf ear.”

“Come along for _what_?!”

“Today the Devil King is in a position to rule over other humans, no? In small, infinitesimal way, yes, but...”

“So what?!”

“So, I am concerned that you are undertaking your mission of slaying the Devil King in a rather...leisurely manner. He may seem harmless enough as he goes about his daily business, but once a Devil King, always a Devil King. Once he gains the power to lead and control humans, there is no telling this leopard may changes its spots.”

Isn’t the saying that a leopard never changes it’s spots?

The point still stands.

“I want to avoid disaster before it happens, but I am all too aware that I, alone, am not up to the task.”

What kind of disaster to do think I’m orchestrating? The GM made it very clear that I’m _not_ to level the SFC.

You may only be the temporary tyrant of a single MgRonald franchise, but that does not mean you cannot cause trouble.

“I wished to avoid stoking the flames needlessly by taking action on my own, but I knew if I simply asked you, Emi, you would rebuke me once more. So, I opted to take a different...”

“All right! I get it, I get it!”

I heave a heavy, defeated sigh.

“And remember, you were attacked by a masked interloper just the other day. My mission does not end with the Devil King’s defeat - I must also bring you back to Ente Isla, so we may finally learn the truth. Working together will help dispel any doubts that linger in my mind...and besides, I may even come to your aid if the need arises.”

“Well, right now, the biggest issue is how we stop Rika from going all nuts like this.”

I turn around at the sound of my name.

“Stop me from what?”

“...Nothing. Sorry. Let’s get going. I want to get this over with.”

“Ooh, _someone_ like her chances!”


	28. Chapter 28

I look around the area near Hatagaya station.

There’s a huge crowd outside the new SFC, but the MgRonald appears to be almost deserted.

“Well, we’re here...but the MgRonald’s looking pretty dead. Maybe now isn’t the right time for an intervention after all. If it ain’t busy in there, it’s gonna get reeeeal awkward if this whole thing goes south. Having other people around helps keep things more restrained, you know? We don’t want to mess up his work environment too much if it gets weird, either... Well, good thing there’s a packed Sentucky Fried Chicken just across the street. How ‘bout we head there and formulate a plan first?”

Good idea, there’s no way Chiho would react well if you started this up in the MgRonald.

“I know you’re loving every minute of this, Rika.”

“All right. First off, tell me a bit more about this Maou guy. Maybe that’ll give us a clue to solving this mess.”

Only if you plan on letting Rika in on the secret.

I push open the doors of the SFC.

Well you can always hope the SFC doesn’t have any free seats.

“Hello and welcome to SFC! We just had a table of four clear out. If you could just make your way to the register...”

Seems some just cleared up for you, lucky that.

“Here. We have an easy-to-read menu available to peruse right here.”

The employee at the counter is short, and wearing an extremely out of place pair of sunglasses. He hands you an extra copy of the menu so you can read it more easily.

I accept the menu and look it over.

“I’ll have an iced coffee. How ‘bout you two?”

“I think I shall order a maple cookie and iced tea value set. With milk, please.”

“...Iced coffee.”

“Sweet! I’ll cover it this time, okay? Oh, and that’ll be all for us.”

The pint-sized employee nods with a smile as you speak.

“Perfect. We will have that out in just a moment. If you’re interested, I have a grand-opening coupon here for you to use...”

The employee offers you a colourful flyer.

I accept.

Your description of the employee sounds like SFC’s manager.

“Right. We will begin preparing your order at once. I am sure our food and drink will be overjoyed at the thought of being consumed by such a beautiful trio of women. Let me give your change.”

Definitely the manager.

“Okay...”

I extend my hand to the employee without a glance.

The employee cups your hand before putting your change and receipt in it.

“Hyuh?”

I shoot an instinctive glance at the employee.

His back is already turned as he prepares your drinks on a tray.

“Huh. One of those ‘hands-on’ customer service things, maybe?”

“Well, my apologies for making a group of fine women such as yourself wait so long. Here is your order.”

I give the employee a vague nod and accept the tray, then I turn back to Emi and Suzuno.

“Man...It’s always men like that, you know? They act all nice, but take ‘em out on a date, and _you’ll_ wind up doing all the heavy lifting. And that cologne, jeez!”

“Who’re you talking about?”

“Oh, no one in particular. Let’s go upstairs.”

I lead you up to the stairs and to our table. I sit you both down on the sofa side of the table and give you a look like a judge calling court into session.

“All right. Now that we’re all settled down, how ‘bout we cover the events that led us to this point? This guy...Sadao Maou, right? I know you talked a little to me about him before, Emi, but I’d like to get both of your opinions here, while you’re together. How ‘bout it?”

“Well, to me, he is neighbour of the dwelling into which I recently moved...a kind one.”

“And to me, if it were possible, I’d like to kill him right now.”

“Ooh, kind of a big difference of opinion, huh? Sounds like your hiding something here, Emi.”

Well yes, I am, but it’s not what she’s thinking. I glower at you.

“Listen, Rika, I should really make this clear: There is nothing at all between Maou and me. I don’t want her getting involved with him for completely different reasons. It’s not like we’re fighting over his love or anything.”

“Oh, really? But when you stayed over with me, didn’t you say something about how ‘Maou is all mine’ or something?”

“I did _not_! Quit putting words in my mouth!”

You back me up on this, there’s nothing that transpires that you don’t know about right.

Well we did leave your characters there unsupervised for a while, who knows what happened during that time.

...What’re you implying with that, exactly?

Only that Emi could have said that, and we would never know.

“Besides, why are you so hell-bent on matching me and Maou together anyway? Just thinking about the idea makes me sick! Hanging out with that cruel, wicked, stubborn, thoughtless, bummy freak, someone who thinks he did you a favour just because he lent you a piece-of-crap umbrella...”

“You will _not_ berate him like that, Yusa!”


	29. Chapter 29

I look up at the speaker.

I spin my chair around in the direction that this voice came from.

I’m staring down at you, still holding a tray full of the remnants of a recently eaten meal.

“What are _you_ doing in here?! Where _were_ you until now, anyway?”

As I say this I point my finger at him.

“I noticed you when you first came in here! I had deliberately avoided you because I didn’t want any more trouble today.”

When? I don’t recall you roleplaying any of that.

Text messages. It allowed your interactions with Sarue to flow naturally while he also performed actions. Apparently none of you were looking at the board.

You’ve gotten quite good at multitasking.

I’ve had a lot of practice performing this particular type of multitasking, thanks to a certain someone last campaign.

“I was hoping to slip out of here unnoticed, but I am _not_ the sort of monster to stand by idly while you spread all these horrid lies and falsehoods about this great man!”

“Wait a sec, Ashiya! I could actually use your help here. This has a lot to do with you and Maou, too.”

He certainly knows Emi has no feelings for Maou.

“What? Why would I ever even raise a finger to...”

“Well, what, you’re to conduct research on this place for your friend, right? I’ll be happy to buy whatever you want.”

“Hmm. Well, if you insist.”

I rapidly sit down next to Rika.

“Whoa!”

“I...I had no idea you were such a greedy pig.”

“Hmph. You misunderstand me. Right now, the only thing that tales precedence in my mind is our house’s finances. If it will provide us with valuable money savings, I will climb any mountain, wade through any mud bog, withstand any humiliation!”

Your character really would do _anything_ to save the household money wouldn’t he?

Yes.

Up to and including deliberately poisoning his damn self.

“Quit acting stupid. You don’t have to get all high and mighty over free fast food.”

“Quiet, you. Now, I was unable to research SFC’s dessert and salad selection on my current budget. Perhaps I will make a secondary order later.”

“Um...Is this a friend of yours or something?”

“Absolutely not!!”

“Absolutely not!!”

The nearby diners flash you looks at this impromptu shouting chorus.

“I am not exactly sure who you are, but among your companions, I am perhaps best known as Ms. Kamazuki’s neighbour. My name is Shiro Ashiya.”

“Oh! Well, hello there. I’m Emi’s friend Rika Suzuki. So if you’re her neighbour...does that mean you live with this Maou guy?”

“Indeed I do. You know of the master of the house?”

I glance at Emi, hoping she can indicate whether or not this Rika person is aware of the master of the house’s true identity.

I shake my head. Her player is really far too concerned with milking the DM for roleplaying based experience to bother having her character find out.

Well how else I am I going to get experience? I can’t exactly fight any of the opponents the GM sends in can I? I work in a call centre.

Doesn’t mean you couldn’t gain some kind of special power. I’m sure the GM could think of something if you wanted to participate in combat.

Yeah I guess, but honestly I wanna see how far I can take the character without combat experience.

“Yeahhh, kind of. And I’d like to know some more about him, if you don’t mind me asking.”

And that’s going to set off more than a few of Ashiya’s alarm bells, a complete stranger inquiring about Maou like that.

“Uh, Ashiya? There’s really nothing to be afraid of. I’m pretty sure about _that_ , anyway.”

Like he’s really going to trust _your_ word about anything.

“So basically, the way I understand it, there’s this guy that Emi doesn’t want other women to hang out with.”

“Eh?”

My eyebrows wrinkle as I give Emi an honestly concerned look.

“Yusa, what is all of this about?”

“...That’s what I’d like to know.”

Since the entire reason this is happening is because of a conspiracy to give Rika something to do.

I size up the assembled women before continuing.

“A man who Emi doesn’t want other women near, is it...? And it may involve me, as well? I see. Trying to catch me off guard, are you, Yusa?”

I flash a grin at you.

What are you planning?

What makes you think that he’s planning something?

The only reason Ashiya would ever, _ever_ smile at Emi is if he think’s he’s gotten the jump on her.

“Well, indeed, where should I begin, then?”

I look as though I am thinking something over.

“I...don’t think Ms. Kamazuki is aware of this yet, but Maou and I used to manage a company together.”


	30. Chapter 30

“Whaaa? A company?!”

“A-Ashiya?! What’re you talking about?!”

“What on earth does he mean?”

Well, you haven’t told him your true identity have you? He has to be careful not to let anything slip in front of you or Rika.

“Like, Maou isn’t that old, is he?! Is he one of those start-up whiz kids or something?”

...That would be one way to put it.

“Something of the sort, yes.”

“Wowww... Well, this certainly paints things in a new light! So what kind of company was it?”

“Well, our primary business was in real estate management and temporary staffing. There was some construction work, as well. We were called...the Maou Group.”

“...Oh, yeah, a lot of architectural firms call themselves ‘The Something-Something Group,’ don’t they?”

“...Temporary staffing? Really?”

“Quite a ‘group’, indeed...”

I have to admit, the story you're making up is certainly robust.

And suspiciously well-suited to take in Rika, given her family owns a factory.

I’m allowed to remember things you outright state about your character, aren’t I?

“But, sadly, the venture ended in failure, and now we live in - and I apologize to Ms. Kamazuki; I know you just moved in and such - a dilapidated apartment and scrounge together what part-time work we can. Maou and myself, along with another business partner living with us, are doing our best to struggle against the difficulties we face in rebuilding our good name and fortune. The question for me, then, is how Yusa is involved with this.”

I gasp slightly. Don’t make me have to erase Rika’s memory like I did Chiho’s.

That isn’t my plan for you.

“Yusa, you see, worked for a rival firm at the time.”

“Huh? Emi? You worked in the construction business?!”

“No, you were still a temp employee back then weren’t you?”

“A temp... Um. Well.”

“My goodness. You, the Hero of her domain, a temporary worker?”

“Don’t _fall_ for it, Suzuno!”

I elbow you under the table.

“We were active in a variety of industries, but we were still small-scale business, the sort where the top managers were out on the field, directing work sites and so forth. But thanks to her own talents and the backup her company provided her, we often found ourselves scrambling for contracts against Yusa.”

“Scrambling for contracts... But why would a big company give that kind of work to a temp?”

“Ah, well...you know, I kind of had some connections. Like, I knew one of guys on the executive board, so...”

You’re lucky I have a vested interest in Rika accepting this story, or I would not have helped you out of that line of questioning.

“Ohh. Well, I guess it makes sense you’ve been around, huh? You’re so good with languages, besides. So what happened next?”

And you’re both lucky I actually want to see where you go with this story.

“Yusa had a number of powerful coworkers and managers watching over her, but...well, really we were a bunch of ragtag kids, none of whom were particularly more experienced in the field than the rest of us. And when the economic downturn came, smaller firms like ours were the first to crumble.”

“Hohh... I guess so, yeah. I’ve heard about how stingy the banks are with making loans and stuff these days. And with all the cheap imports coming into Japan, a lot of companies are losing out, even if they make better products.”

I admit, it was clever of you to explain your personal history in a way that would strike a chord with Rika.

I figured it would make her more inclined to believe me.

And you would be right on that account.

“So, in the end, Yusa was the only one competing with us for contracts...and that wasn’t a winnable battle for us. Thus, we closed up shop, and after spending a year-ish in our apartment in Sasazuka, we happened to run into Yusa again. She remembered us from our business dealings, of course, and I’m sure she has her own opinions and such about us. In fact, she occasionally stops by to see how we are faring.”

“Oh, that sort of thing...?”

I nod to myself, apparently having reached some sort of logical conclusion. This was really well thought out, did you plan this in advance or something.

Nope, I made up the whole thing on the fly, impressive wasn’t it?

Either way, Emi’s owing big time for this isn’t she? That’s what you had planned for her.

Oh yes, don’t think you’re repaying this with some simple desserts and salads.

“So, recently, the very kind Ms. Kamazuki here moved in next door. If Yusa would prefer that she stay away from us, I’m sure it’s because she doesn’t want her caught up in our indigent, hand-to-mouth sort of lifestyle...not is _this_ economy.”

“...Hand-to-mouth?”

I calmly nod in response to Suzuno.

“Maou is still a young man, but he unfortunately doesn’t have a college degree or any other higher education. For someone like that, starting a new firm takes a great deal of knowledge, money and connections...all three of which we regrettably lack, in spades, at the moment. The only work we had a shot at were the kind of contracts that even Emi, at the far fringes of her firm, would be fighting for.”

“...You don’t have to call it the fringes.”

“Instead of taking the sort of vast risks we prefer, I am sure Yusa wants to help Ms. Kamazuki. Guide her into an honest, stable living situation. ...And it looks like you’ve been enjoying the fresh air the city today, have you not?”

I chuckle as I take in the change in your appearance from this morning.

“Oh, er, this was simply a matter of studying social customs, and...”

I look down shyly, my face turning red despite myself.

“Well, there’s hardly anything to be ashamed about. A woman like yourself, enjoying the big city... What could be a better way to take in the social scene? Regardless, Maou still hasn’t given up on his goal of building a new and successful firm. Today, he’s devoting himself heart and soul to MgRonald as he tries to learn the art of management from the ground up. In a single year, he has already risen to the post of shift supervisor. One day, when the time comes, I look forward to working under him in a new, and healthier, outfit...and, until then, I will do everything I can to support him.”

And yes, that does include poisoning myself if necessary.

It really isn’t though, you know.

“But, as they say, all of life is a gamble. And I can certainly understand if Yusa has concerns about Ms. Kamazuki becoming deeply involved with us, lest she becomes affected by something unraveling in the future.”

“Oh, I am vey much involved already.”

I don’t seen to have heard you.

“Maou can be a rather stubborn person at times...or, should I say, he tends to bear a grudge against people. He rather dislikes Yusa’s visits, even though she is simply acting out of concern for us. Thus, I think the situation is quite a bit different from what you may be picturing, Ms. Suzuki.”

The embarrassment of hearing this story coming out of the mouth of a demon is making me want to disappear.

“But...well, wow, huh? You guys must be about my age, and you’re doing all these crazy things! That’s amazing! Boy, now I’m feeling pretty silly for getting all these wacky ideas in my head! You should’ve just said so earlier, Emi.”

Somehow I get the feeling you would have found a way not to believe me.

“Indeed...but, in the end, we failed. Our president now works part-time at MgRonald, and I serve as his faithful homemaker. And one of us even lacks the desire to search for honest work at all. Some ‘whiz kids’ we are.”

Not going to talk about what happened to your other two ‘business partners’?

What do you want me to say? Even more total financial ruin than what we are currently facing is about the happiest option I could go with here. The more accurate ones are _much_ too dark for the current discussion.

“Yeah, but...”

I turn towards you.

“If you’re keeping yourselves going with odd jobs and still staying pretty comfortable, I’d say you guys got out pretty clean.”

“Pretty...clean?”

“I mean, it sounds like you didn’t leave much debt at all when the company shut down. You didn’t bounce any checks, you didn’t go bankrupt, and you aren’t being chased around by creditors or anything, right?”

Well it isn’t creditors, that’s for sure.

“If you have the talent to wind things down that neatly, I’m sure you’ll get a chance to try again pretty soon. My family back home runs a small factory, too, and...like, it’s just a regular company on paper, but whenever things looked like they were about to go south, it united the whole family. Like, everyone would work together to get over the hump, even if is was just little stuff. Even if it didn’t have anything to do with the factory’s business. So maybe it didn’t work out the first time, but Maou and that other guy you mentioned... They’re eating your food, sleeping in the bedsheets you washed, wearing the pants you put out to dry, right? You’re providing the bare necessities they need, and you should be proud of that, I think. You’re all really looking out for each other. I think you’ve got a bright future ahead of you.”

“Yes...yes, I suppose so.”

I take another look at you.

“Thank you very much. You are the first person to ever say anything like that to me.”

I smile softly.

The sight makes me freeze for a moment.

Did you just see a way to get yourself more involved with the other players?

Yep, I’m going to go for the Chiho approach.

“Ms. Suzuki?”

I come around at the sound of my name. I wave my hands as though I am flustered.

“Oh! Um...yeah. Well, sure. Sorry I was such a buttinsky.”

“Not at all. To be honest, I’ve had a great deal on my mind as of late. I was starting to lose confidence in myself. But hearing you say that...I feel a touch better now.”

“Do you? Well, that’s...that’s great. Yeah. Really great.”

I take a sip of my iced coffee.

“Rika?”

“Ahhhh! Huh? Emi? What’s up?”

“What do you mean, what’s up? I mean...what’s going on, all of a sudden?”

“Oh, nothing! Nothing, nothing, nothing!”

“...You said it four times.”

“Still, though...I guess everybody has their own story, huh...? Y’know, I’m starting to think I want to see this Maou guy for myself.”


	31. Chapter 31

“Huh?”

Not giving up on us going to visit him that easily are you?

“Well, I mean, it takes some serious work to make it to shift manager that quickly in a place as big as MgRonald. Maybe he messed up once, but it sounds like he’s a pretty hardworking guy, you know?”

“Perhaps...He did receive a hundred-yen raise two months after two months working there, he said...”

“Really?! A hundred yen? That’s crazy! In two months? ‘Cause that’s a lot more than you’d normally get for making it through your probationary period. And MgRonald doesn’t exactly go easy on its employees, either. You know, in the right environment, I bet he could really get some things moving!”

“Yes...in the right environment...”

What was with that response?

The the sort of movement Ashiya would prefer really can’t take place in Japan.

You sound like the GM did last campaign.

You do have to admit, no one’s going to make Japan the first choice location for a roleplay featuring a demon king as one of the PCs.

“Maybe I better get in on the ground floor with him, huh?”

“Whoa! Rika?!”

“I don’t mean it in a weird way. I just mean, this is a guy who’s definitely gonna be going places in business. I _am_ the daughter of a company president, after all, so I’ve got a sharp eye out for this stuff.”

“What do you mean...? I don’t quite...”

“When your running a small workshop, the connections you establish on the front lines become really important. If Maou does another start-up and hits it big, having that connection in place now instead of later definitely wouldn’t hurt. ‘Cause you’d be surprised, all the links these little companies share with one another across Japan.”

Though if Maou’s successful his enterprise is going to stretch well beyond just Japan.

“I don’t know if Maou’s line of business matches with ours at all, but it if does, I certainly want to know.”

I doubt it. Unless your family just so happens to produce products with military applications.

“You know, I never asked, Rika, but what does your family make?”

“We make footwear accessories. Mostly shoe soles and stuff.”

Which totally _could_ have military applications fyi. Soldiers wear shoes.

“...Well, I will say that Maou certainly does have his sights set on upward mobility within the MgRonald empire. And who knows? He might place a shoe order with your family one day, Ms Suzuki.”

“Ooh! If he gets involved with staffing, we’d be happy to provide cheap, long-lasting shoes for his company’s uniforms. No order too small! You know, I’m sorry to keep ordering people around, but do you think I could go see him? I know you have to report back to him, Ashiya. Plus, I could help him with his sales a little, too!”

“That was exactly what I was hoping. In that case...”

I flash a devilish grin at Emi.

“You’ll be joining us, right? I’ll expect that you will. I think I’d like to get some cookies and a thousand-island salad to go, if you don’t mind. We can head to MgRonald after that.”

“You greedy little...”

Do you really want to finish that? Who knows what Ashiya might decide to say to Rika.

Uugghh.

“I need to repay Ms. Kamazuki for all the favours she’s provided for us lately, too. I would be glad to cover for it, so please let me know if you’d like anything.”

“Oh, no, I...I plan to make dinner at home, so...”

Then we all head downstairs.

“...You three wait outside, okay? I’ll be right out once I buy that stuff.”

At your words we head to the door.

I see you off before joining the line.

Once you get to the front of the line you are greeted by the employee who served Rika earlier.

“Well, hello there, my lady. Making a face like that would spoil anyone’s dinner, you know.”

Clearly him flirting with anything female in the area is Sarue’s quirk to make us remember him.

“Yeah, sorry about that. One Gourmet Cookie order and salad with thousand-island dressing to go.”

I toss a one-thousand yen bill on the tray in front of me.

“Absolutely. Ah, there is something distinctively attractive about a young, beautiful woman looking tormented over something...”

And clearly he never lets up. I flash this employee a highly dubious look.

“But, no matter what it is that concerns you, time has a way of changing everything, whether one wants it to or not. If you find yourself no longer able to change events by your own free will, you may live to regret it.”

“...I’ve never had an SFC employee meddle in my personal life _that_ much before.”

You know I’m no good at vague plot hints.

But other people here are. I was hoping at least one of you might pick up on something.

“Indeed I apologize for my intrusiveness. But allow me to say just one thing.”

He presents you the bag containing your order.

“Men tend to seize upon women when they are at their weakest. I would advise you to step carefully.”

“...What’s _that_ mean?”

“Oh, nothing profound, certainly.”

Like I’d make things that easy for you.

“Thank you very much. I hope you’ll come back soon. I’m ready to take the next customer here, please!”

The customers behind you begin to move forward, making it impossible for you to question the employee any further.

I begin to leave.

“More trouble’s the last thing I need...”


	32. Chapter 32

“So they’ve got a grand-opening sale running and they’re giving out coupons. Is that it? Anything else?”

“As far as I could observe, even considering that SFC offers a different main menu from MgRonald, it was hard to tell why there should be such an extreme difference in the crowds. The customer service was perfectly normal as well.”

I go over the piece of paper I used to jot down my thoughts.

“One thing I did notice is that the fried chicken they’re famous for certainly does live up to expectations. It depends on the type of piece, of course, but it tasted wonderful, right down to the bone. Quite a surprise!”

“To the bone? Eesh...”

I glare accusingly at you.

What for? It’s not _my_ fault the chicken tastes good. I shake my head in response.

“According to what I had Urushihara dredge up for me, Sentucky uses some kind of unique trick when cooking their fried chicken. Much like the meat we enjoyed at that yakiniku restaurant, the flame reaches into the core of the chicken’s cartilage and so forth. The fact that there isn’t much residue left or your plate after you’re done eating seems like a small detail, but I think that tells the entire story.”

I cross my arms and nod as I listen to your opinions.

“Huh. Not exactly the best way to maintain a turnover ratio, but if you’re willing to sit and linger for a while, it feels a lot nicer having a clean tray in front of you. If someone took the tray away, it’d feel like they were kicking you out, besides.”

“Also, if they’re signs are to be believed, they grind their coffee beans fresh for every cup. The beans are supposedly organic, too.”

“Organic? What, they make it out of organs?”

Are you implying that despite the fact he works in food service, Maou has never heard the word 'organic' before? And apparently has no idea what coffee is made out of.

“No. _Organic_ means they use beans grown naturally, without any artificial fertilizers and such.”

“Right, but if you grind up organs, wouldn’t that give you this red gunk? Why do they call it ‘Blue Mountain’, then?”

I can’t if you’re being serious with that or not.

“Well, regardless, it certainly does its job from an advertising perspective. Strictly speaking in terms of taste, I imagine it is refreshing enough for coffee at that price range.”

“Hmm. Now isn’t exactly hot-coffee season, but that could be a problem in a few months.”

I guess you got over the fact that SFC apparently uses ground up organs to make coffee.

I place a finger on my forehead, a perplexed look on my face. Then I motion to Ashiya to look around the dining area.

“But...yeah, you’re right. There isn’t any real decisive advantage they have over us, I don’t think.”

“You are correct, my liege. But, after having sat inside for two hours or so, there really is little more I can offer. Beyond that, all I can guess is that passerby are having their attention diverted by the novelty.”

“Yeah. There’s a chance of that...but then, there’s a chance of everything.”

I shrug.

“Well, we’re not just gonna sit here and watch. I’ll see what kind of measures we can take to hit back at ‘em. Thanks again.”

“Not at all. I am happy to be of service to you. Now, if I could be of service to your sales figures, I’d like to order two Big Tuna Burger combos, please. Large fries and drinks on both. I have no doubt Urushihara will whine about it, but that should suffice for dinner tonight.”

“If that dead weight in my Devil’s Castle whines about the food he’s freeloading off us, go ahead and punch him out for me. You’ve got my permission.”

“Yes, my liege.”

_Really_? What the hell have I done to deserve this kind of treatment?

Would you like me to make a list? We can start with kidnapping Chiho...

I meant recently.

That was recent.

As in _this_ campaign.

“Also...”

I turn around to face the table the girls are sitting at.

“I do hope you’ll treat the ladies well.”

“Huh? Uh, yeah. Whatever.”

I give a vague nod.

What kind of a response was that?

“Once I return home, I intend to take a different approach. I will try to have Urushihara explore more of the company’s underside. Perhaps there is some hidden trick to their business that is not so obvious from the outside.”

“If there is, I doubt he’s going find it on the Net.”

Barring a string a really high rolls.

“We’re kind of in different categories anyway, so it’s not like knowing their suppliers or cooking methods is gonna help much.”

I don’t know about that. We might be able to teach Maou what coffee is actually made out of.

“Don’t try to overdo it, okay? You’re stilling recovering and stuff.”

“Oh, there is no need to worry about me, Your Demonic Highness.”

While the two demons are having their exchange, I assemble the items for Ashiya’s order. Once done, I had them to Ashiya.

“Thanks for waiting, Ashiya. And good luck to both of you guys in the fight, okay?”

“Certainly. Thank you very much. I will do my best.”

I return your thanks with a smile.

I lug my heavy bag of food out of the dining area and head for home.


	33. Chapter 33

I turn my eyes towards the women in the dining area.

“Wow, they sure are connected to each other, huh? In business and in private, too, I guess. Always thinking about how to improve their business... Real pros, huh? You sure know a lot of people with talent, Emi. Oh, uh, counting me, I hope!”

“Yeah. Sure. You’re in.”

“These seats are harder than Sentucky’s.”

I turn towards the trio of women, flashing an uncomfortable smile.

“Um...if...I...may...ladies?”

“...What?”

“Would you mind placing an order before sitting down, if you could?”

“Oh? Huh. Small iced coffee. Bring it over for me.”

“We work on a self-service ordering system over there at the counter.... _ma’am_!”

“Okay, will you be nice enough to bring it over if I add an apple pie?”

Clearly this is going nowhere. I turn to the woman sitting across from Emi, hoping she’ll be of more help.

“Ma’am, would...”

“Wow, so you’re Maou, huh? Y’know, considering how loyal Ashiya is to you, I can’t say you’re exactly brimming with charisma. The shift you’re supervising looks pretty darn dead to me, too.”

“...Would you tell me who the hell you freaks think you are?”

“Ooh, you better watch your words, huh? The headquarters wouldn’t want to get letters about this, would they?”

I grin ear to ear as I watch you.

“Shut up. Even customers have rules they have to follow in here. Who are you, anyway?”

I’m guessing your a friend of Emi’s and as such, a mortal foe.

“I’m Rika Suzuki. Emi’s coworker. You’re Sadao Maou, right? Emi and Suzuno and Ashiya told me about you.”

“...I don’t know what Ashiya and Suzuno said, but _she_ couldn’t have said anything good about me.”

“Well, Ashiya and Emi had a kinda one-sided view of you, so I thought I’d go and check you out for myself.”

“Huh. Great. You must love butting in on other people’s lives, don’t you?”

I glare at Emi.

Why me?

You brought her here, so this is your fault.

“Ugh... I’m getting no customers. I got Emi in here... I’m gonna be flat broke by the end end of the night.”

I arrive with a tray in hand.

“Oh, you shouldn’t talk like that, Maou...”

“My! You certainly seem full of vigor, Chiho.”

“Thanks, Suzuno. Busy day?”

I give Suzuno a smile as I sidle in next to Maou.

“Yusa is a valuable customer of ours, you know. What did you say to me earlier? ‘As long as they’re paying us, a customer’s a customer’?”

I place the tray I’m carrying on the table.

“One iced coffee, and one piping-hot apple pie!” 

“Oh! Chiho!”

I guess she would’ve been within earshot, huh? I stand up to grab my wallet.

“I’m sorry! You know how I get with Maou, so...”

“Oh, that’s all right. I understand. I’m really not supposed to prepare orders until we put it through the register, but we aren’t going to be crowded for a little while yet. That’ll be three hundred yen.”

I sheepishly hand the coins to Chiho.

“Pah. So _that’s_ how you treat Chi, huh?”

“Of course that’s how I treat her. You think I put you and her on the same level? That’s being really rude to Chiho.”

“Ooh, zing.”

I giggle at your exchange.

“So is this your friend, Yusa?”

“Sure am! Rika Suzuki. I work with Emi all day.”

“My name is Chiho Sasaki. Yusa’s been a big help to me in a lot of ways!”

I bow to you politely.

I study your face, then beckon you over with a finger.

“Yes?”

“Chiho, right?”

“Yes...”

I grab you and hug you tight.

“Ahh!”

What are you doing?!

“You’re so cuuuuuute! Isn’t she? She just the cutest! I mean, this must be some kind of modern Japanese miracle!”

“Agh, agh, agh!”

Why are you acting like this? Rika gave no indications that she would react this way to Chiho! I attempt an escape. ...8.

I roll a 13 to keep you in my grasp.

You flail you arms around but are unable to escape Rika’s sudden attention.

“I can’t believe all these amazing people you hang out with, Emi! She’s so polite, and she has this superserious work ethic, and she’s cute, too! It’s gotta be against the law to be this cute!”

_You’re_ going to be breaking some laws of you carry on like this.

“She’s a national treasure! They should make her a World Heritage Site!”

“S-Suzuki?!”

Why are you all just standing there? _Someone_ help me!

“Hey, Rika, you’re scaring Chiho...”

“Yeah, and it’s so _cuuute_!”

Thanks for the effort, but the help would be more appreciated if it was _useful_.

“Come on, Rika, you’re acting like some drunk at two A.M.!”

“Ohhh, all riiiiiight. Sorry I got so excited, Chiho.”

I release you.

Finally. Freed, I pant for air.

“Gah... It, it’s okay...I think...”

“So, did you find any good work leads?”

And thanks for just standing by there, oh shift manager.

“Not yet, no...”

“Oh? Well, looks like you enjoyed the trip around town, at least. That’s good.”

“It, it was a social-study excursion!”

“Social study? Yeah, great, great. Just make sure you keep your purse strings tight, okay? I know it’s easy to get excited out there, but you’re gonna go belly-up if you keep spending money like that.”

I turn my attention to Emi.

“And since she hasn’t found any work yet, try not to turn her into some shopaholic secretary, all right? The way Ashiya put it, it sounds like you had some kind of trouble?”

“Like _you_ need to know. There’s no trouble at all, as long as you don’t do anything to mess up her tranquil, _private_ life.”

I laugh and shrug.

“See? I told you. Don’t blame me if you wind up paying for it later.”

“Wait, what are you...?”

“Hey, by the way, what are you gonna do about all this?”

Guess I’m not finishing that question.

“Sure doesn’t look like business is booming in here. Emi’s surrounded by all these talented people, so I’m sure you aren’t the lunkhead you’re starting to look like.”

“Oh, so now you’re saying I look like a lunkhead? I don’t really appreciate that kind of feedback from customers, thanks. Bring it up with the regional manager if you care that much.”

“Hey, just think of it as some friendly sales advice. But, here lemme just come out with it - I’m here because I want to see how you work.”

“Whadaya mean, how I work? Who are you, anyway?”

Because you’re starting to sound _really_ suspicious I might say.

“Oh, Emi’s friend, Suzuno’s friend, and the daughter of a company president.”

“That doesn’t exactly help me, miss!”

Nor does it make you seem any less dangerous to me.

“If you aren’t here to eat something, then get out of here, okay? I may not look like it, but I’m pretty busy right now.”

“You talked about ‘hitting back them’ just a second ago. What’re you gonna do, huh?”

“You aren’t too gifted at listening to people, are you, lady?”

“You there, Maou?”


	34. Chapter 34

An elderly customer enters the store, carrying something large and green with him.

I recognize the man, and hurriedly leave the table and walk over to him.

“Nabe! You didn’t have to run all the way over here!”

“Didn’t want to let you down, Maou! I figured the quicker, the better anyway.”

He laughs a hearty laugh.

“Well, thanks, though. You know I could’ve picked it up. Would you mind propping that up against the wall over there?”

“Ooh, right. Shouldn’t have brought this huge tree into the dining area, huh?”

He slaps himself on the forehead and places the tree outside by the door.

“I spent the day clearing off all the small bits and the branches low enough to poke kids’ eyes out. It’s all ready to go! I got you the best one I could find, so have fun decorating it! And now that that’s done, I better get going.”

“What, already? You want anything to eat first? My treat.”

Nabe shakes his head in response.

“Thanks for the thought, but I got my wife cooking dinner tonight. Next cleaning run, maybe, eh? Say hello to Ms. Kisaki for me.”

With a quick wave, Nabe strides confidently out the door. At this all the free MgRonald staff begin streaming out of the back, carrying rolls of coloured paper.

“Wow, look at the size of that thing!”

“We better get this all decorated before we hit the rush hour!”

“Hey, I think we still have some of those tiny plastic cones with the tops missing back in the storehouse. You think we could tape ‘em on the branches?”

Sorry to interrupt your little one-man play, but I’d like to know what’s going on.

“So...what’s that big thing out there?”

Noticing your voice, I return to your table.

“What do you think it is? It’s a sasa bamboo plant.”

“Sasa?”

“It’s almost time for the Sasahata Star Festival.”

As I say this, I take out several sheets of coloured paper cut into thin strips and a black marker.

“Sasahata...Star Festival?”

How did you convince the GM something like that was happening?

I was considering adding something like it and they overheard me.

And I saw an opportunity.

So you begged the GM basically. So what’s this festival all about? 

“Well, every year, the Sasazuka and Hatagaya neighborhoods work together to hold a summer festival. That’s where Sasahata comes from - it’s just the two names put together. We’re actually a little late on decorating, but what goes better with a Sasahata festival than a real sasa plant?”

“I asked the store manager to put in a request with the regional office as a special favour. Kids aged twelve or younger can write their wishes on these coloured strips of paper and tie them to the tree to decorate it, and we’ll give them a free small drink in exchange.”

“The Star Festival gets into gear at the end of next week and we’ll have a ton of customers that weekend, so Maou thought this would be a good way to get a leg up on Sentucky Fried Chicken.”

I proudly hold my chest out high.

“Huh. _You_ did that?”

“We usually have a plastic bamboo plant we bring out each year, but I figured that doesn’t have the kind of natural attraction to people that something like a Christmas tree does.”

“Maou gave us all these ideas for decorations to make, too!”

I show Rika the decorations that have been made out of the strips of paper. Here’s what a few of them would look like.

“Wow, this is pretty.”

Did you make these yourself? Because they look really good.

You don’t want to know how many attempts it took to get them to look like that.

“But wouldn’t a real-life sasa bamboo plant be expensive? No way they’d spend that much on a part-timer’s request. Or is that your own?”

I puff my chest out.

“Heh-heh! You’d think so, right? But these are the kinda things an assistant manager has to charm his way through, you know? That guy earlier... Mr. Watanabe’s his full name... He’s a guy I came to know while I was volunteering with the city’s urban cleanup campaign, and he’s got a ton of those in his garden.”

“You...volunteer with the antilitter guys?”

“Heavens! Donating one’s time for the sake of the community? Sadao, you actually perform such deeds?”

“Huh. So you actually care about the neighborhood you live in.”

“Yeah...”

Nice to see you have faith in my character.

Well, he _is_ supposed to be evil, though I am considering declaring an alignment change.

“Our last cleaning day was yesterday morning, actually. He said yes immediately when I asked, and I was supposed to come over to pick it up, too... I feel kinda bad about making him come here instead, though. He stops by sometimes for a bite with his grandson. So, anyway, we can’t keep this tree around until next year, of course, so on the day of Star Festival itself, I figured we could cut it up into little saplings and give them out to kids. Kind of a mini festival tree, you know?”

“Hmm! You think that’ll pay off, though? I dunno if kids these days would care about something like that.”

I wag my finger at your criticism.

“Well, the sort of kids who’d write their wishes and tie them on the tree would dig it, wouldn’t they? Adults like us, we tend to buy into this idea that all kids care about these days are video games. But, you know, every one of those Star Festival wishes has meaning to it, just like every ornament on a Christmas tree. And it’s having all of that together in a common place that makes it so pretty. It’s a living bamboo plant, so they decorate their rooms with it and stuff, and if they get sick of it or it dies, the tree and the paper decorations are all burnable, so they can just toss it in the recycle bin.”

What was with the filibuster? I get that you put a lot of thought into this, but we really didn’t need to know all those details.

“There’s no guarantee this’ll attract customers, of course, but I figured that, instead of the same old generic decorations whenever the season cam around, it’d be better to have something that helped connect us to our customers and the area around us.”

“Wow, you’ve really thought this through.”

My eyes dart between you and the sasa tree, before I finally turn straight to Emi.

“He’s _good_.”

“Ooh, did you here that, Emi? Your friend just said that assistant manager’s _good_!”

“Hee-hee! Don’t make her take it back, Maou!”

There’s no way Emi’s going to be happy about complimenting you, but alas she is in public, so...

“....................................................................................................................You apply yourself to your work.”

A crew member runs up to the table, carrying large plastic objects in both arms.

“Maou! I found the broken plastic cones. That, and here are some of the no-parking poles, the kind you fill with water on the bottom to keep them upright. We could probably stick it on these to make it more stable.”

“Ah, perfect! Thanks a lot! Now we just need to decide on a location!”

I pick up the cone and poles and dart outside.

I watch you go.

“Are you feeling okay, Yusa? You don’t look too good.”

“Oh, no, I’m fine. Just thinking about something.”

Another employee calls Chiho over to the register.

“Well, if you’re tired, try not to overdo it, okay? I’ll yell at Maou for you after we’re done.”

With that, I return to work.

I watch the scene in the MgRonald’s play out before me, seeing nothing of the evil Devil King I swore to slay.

Which is exactly why I’m thinking of giving him an alignment change.

“But he’s...he’s just not doing anything _bad_ here...”

I too, an watching Maou’s back with a puzzled expression on my face.

I’m outside, keeping the plant from tipping over in the breeze. So does it work?

What?

The sasa plant. Does it attract customers into the store?

...Roll.

20.

Of course it would be a nat. 20... As soon as you steady the tree, you get a huge on rush of customers, as though they were being drawn in by magic.

You’re hinting at something aren’t you?

Just pass me one of the counters.

“Huh?”

“Rika? What’s up?”

“Well...it’s just they’re kind of getting thus huge onrush of customers all of a sudden...”

I point unsteady finger out of the door.

There is a wave of people pushing towards the MgRonald’s and the wave of people heading towards the Sentucky Fried Chicken seems to have dissipated.

I notice this once my fight against the sasa plant ends.

“Dude, dude, dude!!”

A surprised smile crosses my face and I half run back inside the store.

“They’re here! They’re here! All hands, battle stations! It’s time to rock ‘n roll!!”

Before you even finish speaking the human wave crashes into the MgRonald, quickly filling the tables.

“Holy...Are you _kidding_ me?! What kinda feng shui did that bamboo give him, anyway?”

I can’t help but laugh at the scene before me.

“How could this even...?”

I focus on the bamboo plant, my face hardening.

“Hello and welcome! Please form a single line in front of the register once you’ve decided on your order!”


	35. Chapter 35

Thanks for meeting with me again, recent events made me want to flesh out my character a bit more.

It’s really no problem at all, like I said last time, I’ll take any opportunity to work on what’s going on in Ente Isla while the party is busy hanging around in Tokyo. So... Archbishop Robertio, after recovering from his fainting spell, gives you the following order.

“Within your rights as a member of the Reconciliation Panel, I command you to find a way to deliver judgement upon him while damaging the authority of the Church as little as possible.”

So he wants me to somehow track down and deal with Olba and his activities without damaging the reputation of the Church.

Pretty much. This is a common pattern with them too, they don’t like to risk their reputations being damaged. Have you given any more though to the role of the Inquisition in the war back in Ente Isla.

Well, you mentioned there was a lot of infighting within the human forces on the Western Island, right?

Yeah, and it made Lucifer’s job in conquering it a lot easier than it otherwise would have been, at least until Emilia came along.

So I was thinking the Inquisition’s job was probably to take out any enemies of the Church in hopes of reducing the resistance some of the other kingdom’s had to its authority.

And you were right in the thick of it?

Of course, I was hunting down other human’s in the name of justice. Although, once Emilia came along I found myself with a lot less work, since she succeeded in building a united front against the demon’s under the banner of the Church.

Which fell apart as soon as she ‘died’ defeating the Devil King, with people now hunting down the Inquisitors, which is why they were dissolved and the Reconciliation Panel put in their place. The behind this being that the Reconciliation panel would hold more open trials of those deemed to be heretics.

I find this all a farce, and this as a world sliding back into what it was before the war. That’s why I want to bring back Emilia, to build a peace where hope can truly flourish again.

So your character’s motivation is that she wants true peace above all else.

Yep.

That sounds like it should be really interesting to play actually, especially with what I have planned for the plot.

Which you’re not going to tell me about, I’m guessing.

Of course not.


	36. Chapter 36

“Well, I’m off.”

I nod at you.

“Sure thing. Great job today. Thanks for the bento meal, too. I’ll wash the box and get it back to you tomorrow.”

“M-Maou, you’re being too loud!”

The rest of the employees don’t seem to have noticed your conversation, so your worry is for naught.

“Boy, tonight sure was relief, though, huh? I’m sure glad we saw a steady stream of customers through the dinner hours. Hopefully that was enough to prop the final numbers back up to what they should be.”

I shiver, remembering Ms. Kisaki’s Arctic-blizzard of a smile.

I do the same.

“Yeah. Sure wouldn’t want to get deported to Greenland before I graduate from high school.”

“It’s kind of hard to tell when Kisaki’s joking and when she isn’t, huh? Well, be careful on the way home.”

“Yep! And, uh, sorry I took your bike this morning.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine.”

I take my eyes off Chiho and look around the store.

Emi and Suzuno are standing behind you, some distance away.

“Oh, hey, Emi! You guys are free, aren’t you? You sitting at that table all night messed up our turnover ratio, so you could at least repay me by walking home with Chi, okay?”

“Well, fine, but we _did_ place orders, you know. I don’t think you have the right to scold us like that.”

We spent over two thousand yen over the course of the night, after all.

You could have left with Rika.

I didn’t want to leave Suzuno alone in here, and _she_ wanted to stay.

“...Tell Ashiya that we’re even now, okay?”

“Huh? Why should I care? That’s _your_ fault for getting in a position where you owed him one.”

And do you really think walking Chiho home and spending some money at MgRonald is going to be enough for him?

“What’s past is past, all right? Just get out of my sight. And I want you to see _Chi_ all the way home, got it?”

Why are you putting so much emphasis on Chi? Who else would I be showing home?

Chiho isn’t the only other person you’re walking out with is she?

“Of course. You don’t have to tell me. Come on, Chiho.”

I begin to depart the MgRonald.

“Okay. See you next time, Maou.”

I walk after Emi.

“...Excuse me.”

I bow at Maou and leave.

I reply with a warm smile.

“Thank you very much! Come again soon!”


	37. Chapter 37

“So, where do you live, Chiho?”

I turn in the direction of Sasazuka.

“Um, it’s pretty much on the opposite side of Koshu-Kaido Road from Maou’s apartment, but are you sure you want to walk all the way over with me?”

“No problem. I was planning to take the train from Sasazuka anyway, so it’s not that far of a detour from there. Not that I’m doing this to please him or anything, but it’s night and all, so...I wouldn’t want a girl to just go off by herself.”

“Aw, you’re a girl, too, aren’t you, Yusa?”

“Yeah. Just kind of a special one. But let’s get going.”

What are our surroundings like?

Car traffic is still heavy, but there aren’t many other pedestrians on the sidewalk. Most of the shops along the street have their lights shut off, leaving the walkways quite dark. The Shuto Expressway is towering above you. When you reach the intersection bordering Sasazuka, you are stopped by a red light.

“Ah, but I’m still happy we got all those customers in.”

I stretch as I speak.

“Was it that bad since morning?”

“I think it may have been the slowest day since I began working there. Maybe that feng shui stuff isn’t as stupid as it sounds, huh? I admit, that sort of thing makes you think a little.”

The light turns green as you speak.

I begin to walk towards the curb.

“...But was it truly a coincidence?”

The sound of Suzuno’s voice stops me.

“Huh?”

I turn around as well.

“Oh! That reminds me. What did you think of Maou’s work ethic and stuff, Suzuno?”

“Did you not notice, Emilia?”

“...Uh?”

“Emilia...? Emilia’s...Yusa’s real...? Suzuno, don’t tell me you’re…”


	38. Chapter 38

“I had had my suspicions, but Chiho is fully aware of the Devil King as well, is she not? I know Emilia that you have your own motives. That you aim to defeat the Devil King on your own terms. But watching ‘Sadao Maou’ handle his assigned tasks today, I have come to the conclusion that we must dispatch the Devil King as quickly as humanly possible.”

What about my work ethic made you decide that?!

“Wha?! Wha - Suzuno?!!”

I begin to lean towards Suzuno.

I stop you before addressing Suzuno.

“What are you talking about? I don’t have any idea where this is coming from.”

“Have either of you given a moment’s thought about why the Devil King is acting like a fine, sensible Japanese youth? Have you ever thought about what may happen if he continues being promoted, if he begins to wield influence within societal systems here? A Devil King with the full trust and acclaim of the people behind him?”

I spread my arms wide.

“Have you ever imagined what the moment might be like when he reveals his true intentions? When he finally betrays this world makes it his own?”

“Sorry, but no.”

You’re not even giving my speech a moment’s thought?

“No offence, but what is getting promoted at MgRonald’s gonna earn him? I mean, yeah, it’s a big company, but even if he goes insane and torches their headquarters or whatever, that’s not really gonna hurt the world much! Maybe it’ll make stock price go down or shake up the fast-food industry, but it’s not gonna make this world flip outside down or...”

“We reside, may I remind you, in a nation where people with nothing more than an elementary or technical school education have become prime ministers that sway the very direction of the world. Do you honestly believe that the Devil King’s bloodlust will be sated within the structure of MgRonald alone?”

“Oh! You’re talking about Kakuei Tanaka, right?”

Kudos to you on your research.

“It would be more logical, I think, to see it as a ruse to throw us off. This cruel tyrant who laid waste to so much of Ente Isla, now a cheerful, hardworking frontline employee. Demons have long lives to work with. Emilia. There is no telling what manner of intricate schemes he has unfolding in his mind. That is why we must strike now, while we can! This no longer simply an Ente Isla crisis. The safety of Japan, and the Earth itself, it at stake.”

“N-no! You can’t! Maou's doing really great as a shift supervisor, too!”

Did you just realize that I’m talking about Maou’s murder here?

I knew, it just took Chiho a bit to realize it.

“And that fact that she still retains her memories is another issue we have to tackle. If it becomes more widely known that the Devil King is alive, there is every chance or more visitors coming to Japan - visitors seeking the simple glory of defeating him, not the loftier callings that drive you and me. Do you think such people care at all about what happens to Japan and its people in the aftermath? They may even try to use Chiho and the people around her to hurt you or the Devil King. Before that happens, we must erase the memories of everyone who has interacted with the Devil King and strike the final blow to end all of this!”

“No! You can’t! You just can’t _do_ that!”

“Chiho, do you know what the purpose of the Star Festival decorations are in Japanese culture?”

“…Huh?”

How is that even relevant?

“The five colours that those paper strips people write their wishes upon represent the five elements that control the spirit in Chinese philosophy. The leaves of the sasa bamboo tree are fabled to house the soul’s of one’s ancestors, while its straightened twigs and branches contain the power to ward off evil. There is, of course, none of those forces at work in modern-day Star Festival decorations.”

Then why did you bring it up?

“But did you see it? The moment the Devil King installed that tree out front, MgRonald was immediately overrun with guests. What do you think that means…?”

“…You’re saying his bamboo tree _attracted_ people?”

I reply with a heavy nod.

“The sasa tree, long associated with the spirits of the earth and the power to cleanse it of evil, is infused with the souls of the people who look to them for seasonal décor. The Devil King unconsciously infused the tree with his demonic power as he decorated it. That is the most natural explanation.”

Well that explains the GM asking for a magic counter. But why didn’t you just say that, without the cultural lesson?

“Considering how much of a shock a flat-screen TV was to you, you sure know a lot about Japanese customs.”

The level of research you’ve done is actually really impressive.

It was all in the name of character roleplay.

“I would be a failure at my missionary work if I did not research the religious customs of the lands I travel.”

I take a step towards you and Chiho.

“So do I have your understanding here? This is no longer merely an Ente Isla issue. If we do not hurry, then Chiho, MgRonald, and soon this entire land will find itself awash in a whirlpool of chaos. Failure to take action, and quickly, will cost us dearly later. And besides, you have already been attacked by an unknown third party. I must keep this world safe, but I must also bring you back to Ente Isla. I understand it may be a painful decision, but these are people you should have never have met, in a world you should never have needed to visit. We must erase Chiho’s memories and erase all traces of Ente Isla that exist in Japan.”

“…No. No…you can’t. I, I don’t want to forget.”

“Chiho…”

“I don’t want to forget. About Maou, about you, about Ashiya, about Suzuno… Okay and I guess Urushihara, too, but…”

Since he seems to come in a package deal with the rest of you.

Hey.

“We’re all friends, we’ve spent all this fun time together…and you want to make me forget all of it just because of stuff going on in another world? That…that’s just mean!”

“…I know there’s no way to fully apologize for it. But…Chiho, this is for your own safety as well.”

I avert my face, looking honestly conflicted.

“I don’t want to forget about Maou! No matter what!!”

“Chiho, the Devil King Satan will use those feelings of yours to his own advantage. He must. And the fact that you are attracted to him may even be part of an elaborate plan he has concocted to make us hesitant, unwilling to combat the Devil King…”

“It is not! Maou isn’t that kind of person! Why do you have to say all those horrible things?! He’s working really hard, he’s so nice to everyone… Why are you saying all of that?!”

“…He is the Devil King. He allowed his demonic hordes in Ente Isla to conduct untold atrocities. He made everyone in the world suffer. He is the leader of all demons!”

“Well, before he became Sadao Maou, did you ever even _meet_ the Devil King Satan, Suzuno?!”

“What do you mean…?”

“All of you are going on about Maou like, _ooh, he’s the Devil King, he’s the Devil King_ , but if he’s really a demon thinking all those bad things, why would he do stuff like fix up the destroyed Shuto Expressway and erase all those terrible memories of the scene from everyone’s minds?! When he got all of that massive power back, he could have mind-controlled the prime minister or the US president or whoever and taken down the whole world! Why didn’t he _do_ that?!”

This would be a really different campaign if he did.

“I…I did not witness the battle Olba Meiyer perpetrated with my own eyes. But I am sure the Devil King had his reasons. Some deeper explanation only he would…”

“Is there any other reason, except he’s a nice guy who wants to help people?! If you cause trouble for other people, then you’re supposed to apologize and make up for it! That’s common sense! And Maou was just doing the obvious thing! I learned how to do my job from Maou. We went through all the steps with me. If I messed something up, he always brought me to task about it. He always had my back when I was still new and inexperienced. Whenever I need to talk about something, he’s always there. Even when he turned into the Devil King Satan, he kept his promises. He taught me how to clean the ice-cream machine. On the same day! If someone like that really wanted to summon his demon hordes or whatever and conquer the world, then how would you explain all of that?!”

“So…so you are bidding us simply let the past go and forgive him?! How many innocent lives on Ente Isla do you think were snatched away by the demonic armies?! Do you think those people would accept it if they heard the Devil King has mended his ways?! You live in a nation at peace. One where you may never be exposed to mortal danger during your entire natural life. And I will _not_ have someone like you question the will behind our quest to slay the Devil King!”

“What would _you_ know?! You just fought the demon armies. You never even _met_ the Devil King himself!”

“…What?”

“Even if Maou turns into Satan again, I _know_ he’s a good person! And I also know that the big church in Ente Isla tried to kill Yusa for no good reason! You never met the Devil King before you stormed the Devil’s Castle, either, right, Yusa? You talked about how Satan’s armies invaded the land and did all these evil things, but that’s it. Do you even know what the Devil King was _doing_ before then?”

I mean _I_ do, since I joined the campaign before you, but I don’t know how much you've been told.

“…You would make a gifted court attorney someday, Chiho. By my name as a former member of the Council of Inquisitors, I guarantee it. The way you turn people’s words against them is breathtaking.”

“Suzuno! Don’t dodge the question! Please, answer me!”

“He was their commander! He bears full responsibility for what his armies did! Do you think a man who orders massacres should escape fault because it was someone else who actually committed them?”

“Hey, can both of you calm down a little? We’re not gonna accomplish anything arguing out here.”

13 for persuasion.

10.

12.

“Wait!”

“But we must!”

“Suzuno… No. Crestia Bell. I think everything you’re telling us is correct. Really. But I just want to say one thing.”

“Yusa…”

“The peace I fought for is the kind of peace were people feel like smiling again. Not a peace where sacrifice is viewed as a necessary evil, where I have to turn my eyes away from something that makes my friends cry. I want to slay the Devil King in a way that everyone can smile about in the end. The idea that we don’t want to get Japan caught up in this just shows how arrogant we are, coming from Ente Isla. We have our own thoughts about the Devil King, and other people have theirs. We don’t have any right to make one-sided decisions for them.”

“…Do you truly believe that?”

“I sure do.”

“It is a pipe dream. Do you want the permission of every man, woman, and child on Ente Isla and Japan before slaying the Devil King? Such an approach is impossible. There is always going to be sacrifices that must be paid.”

“But that’s what I have to do. I am Emilia, the Hero. The hope of mankind. And there’s a more present problem, too. If we meddle with them too much and the Devil King, Alciel, and Lucifer all awaken to their true natures at the same time, the two of us would be at a serious disadvantage. The skill that mystery attacker showed off to me… That wasn’t the Devil King’s style, either. If we hurried along with attacking the Devil King, we’d simply find ourselves in a two-front war without enough manpower or information. So…”

I place my hands on Chiho’s shoulders.

“Right here, right now, I just want to keep you smiling, Chiho. I won’t erase your memories, and I won’t let the Devil King die. And if you insist on pushing the point, you’ll have to fight against me first.”

I hold my hands against my chest, releasing a portion of my power as a warning.

“The holy sword… Are you serious?”

That tiny release of power is enough to send a powerful flash of light across the deserted evening intersection.

“You are a citizen of Ente Isla. I protect you, just as I protect everyone else. But if you want to do anything to Chiho because of those pretexts you spouted off, then I will fight it. I will fight for Chiho’s memories, for her indelible past. She is a friend, a precious one, who I need to protect.”

“Yusa…”

“Besides, you came to Japan because you didn’t like having to cover things that were ‘inconvenient' for your mission, right? I all you cared about was the good name of the Church, you would have tried to cover up Olba’s crimes the moment you found out about them. That would have created the ideal post-way scenario in the Church’s eyes, right? Me and the Devil King being dead would let them build the legend of this great Church guard knight who sacrificed her life to defeat the ultimate evil. But even though you worked for Olba, you weren’t satisfied with that. That’s why you’re so preoccupied with bringing me back home, isn’t it? You want to reveal Olba’s crimes and the dark side of the Church to everyone, so it can purify itself and become the proud beacon of faith that a peaceful Ente Isla deserves.”

I step away from Chiho and approach Suzuno.

“You are, after all, chief of the Reconciliation Panel. The Church wing whose mission it is to spread the Church throughout the world. To portray it as a just faith.”

I extend a hand.

I twist my body avoid it, staggering backwards and dashing into the intersection.

“Whoa! Be careful!”

I pay you no mind as I flee the scene. Man, the both of you managed to hit some major buttons on Suzuno I have to say.

That was some killer roleplaying from all of you, really.

Killer enough to perhaps be worth some experience?

It isn’t like you to be hounding for roleplaying experience.

Hey, Rika’s not the only character who really can’t engage in combat.


	39. Chapter 39

“I’m sorry. I think I probably went too far.”

But, damn, the experience was worth it. There are tears streaming down my face.

“I don’t really know much about Ente Isla. Everything I do know is secondhand knowledge. But all I cared about was myself, and Maou, and…and I was so mean to Suzuno…”

I pat you on the head.

“It’s all right. You can’t choose who you wind up liking.” 

“Yeah, but it embarrasses me, you saying that…”

I gently hug you.

“Yusa…”

“It’s hard for her, too. I’m sure she has a lot to think about. So try to remember that, too, all right?”

“All right…*sniff*…I better apologize to her later…”

“Sure. And make sure it’s a nice, long conversation next time. She’s a lot more open to other people than it looks.”

“…All right.”

I return your hug.

“You’re like a big sister to me, Yusa.”

“I don’t think we’re that different age-wise.”

I flash a smile and run a hand through your hair.

“But…I think we’ll all need to be on guard from now on.”

Who knows what Suzuno’s gonna do now, and there’s still that scythe wielder to worry about.

Maybe you could let Maou and the others in on what’s been going on.

As much as Emi wouldn’t like it, that does seem to be the best course of action. I let out a long, troubled sigh.

“Well, so be it… I really hate this. It’s like I’m helping him or something.”

“You know, if you and Maou are being nice to each other, that’d make me happy, too.”

“Sorry, but if you want us to be friends, that’s one request I’m _definitely_ not taking.”

“But if you’re gonna tell him probably the sooner, the better! If you leave a text and a voice mail on his phone, he’ll probably return it once he gets off of work.”

I take a step away from Emi before removing my cell phone from my bag. I search around in my contact list for Maou’s number.

“But when did you find out, Emi? About…Suzuno and stuff?”

“It was just this morning, actually. She told me everything after breakfast at Sasazuka station, and then…”

Make an initiative roll.

13.

You notice your scythe-weirding attacker from earlier, swinging it down towards you and Chiho.

“Sorry, Chiho!”

I leap at Chiho to push her out of the way of the attack. 17.

You succeed in pushing both you and out of the way of the incoming blow.

“Huh? What…what…?!”

“…Speak of the devil, as they say. These stalkers must really love me.”

Well you did kind of signal him in.

What do you mean by that?

That bit of holy force you released earlier, it lit up the whole street. Were I still following you around in an attempt to kill you, you bet your ass I’d notice that.

“Y-Yusa, this guy…”

“Yep.”

Getting up, I keep Chiho behind me and prepare for a fight.

“The Ente Isla assassin. The one who crashed into convenience-store door in Eifukucho before getting driven away by that clerk’s paintball arsenal.”

My eyes dart between Emi and the scythe-wielder.

“Is that…really an assassin.”

Because, I mean if he’s wearing the same outfit as last time…

And he is.

Then he looks completely ridiculous.

“Well, I can’t think of any Japanese people who fall from the sky spinning that thing around.”

“Y-yeah, I guess…”

“You know, it was the same thing before. Why’s this guy always attack me in public streets? We’re gonna have a ton of witnesses!”

The obvious answer would be that he doesn’t care about witnesses.

“I can’t spend a lot of time on this. It might get a little messy.”

I focus my energy on my right hand, and summon the Better Half.

A flash of purple shoots out from the holes in the attacker’s ski mask.

I roll 12 to dodge the light.

You dart to the side, predicting the path of the beam, the light barely whizzes by your chest before impacting with a guard rail and dissipating.

I shoot a look towards the rail.

It isn’t warped or damaged in any way.

So the beam of light doesn’t have any actual harmful properties?

Apparently.

So the light must just interact with my powers in some way, weakening them somehow.

That sounds vaguely familiar.

“Heavenly Fleet Feet!”

I use the Cloth of the Dispeller on my legs, putting myself face-to-face with my masked opponent, attacking with my Holy Sword as I do so.

…Your attack is blocked by your opponent’s scythe, releasing a shower of sparks.

I try to use my strength to push my opponent’s attack back. 6.

Your opponent isn’t being pushed back, nor it his weapon being damaged in any way. In fact you find yourself being pushed back.

“Who are you…?!”

“Didn’t I tell you? Men like to seize upon weak women.”

“…!! You…!!”

The scythe-wielding maniac attacking us is the manager of the Sentucky Fried Chicken? What is about the Hatagaya neighbourhood that attracts supernatural elements to its fast food joints?

“Ngh…! Divine Flying Blade!”

“None of that. Nothing that would make a woman hurt herself.”

Your foe releases another beam of purple light, striking your glowing sword, completely annulling your attack, as well as draining the holy energy within your sword itself.

“Wha…!!”

Oh, come _on_.

“This is my power. The Evil Eye of the Fallen. The power to overwhelm all wielders of holy magic. It’s mine, and mine alone.”

That’s definitely familiar.

“The Fallen…?! You couldn’t be…!”

“Oh, I am. I’m here to release you from the cruelties of our mission. Sleep well.”

The purple light is beginning to gather towards the centre of the mask.

“I’ll be taking that holy sword back now.”

“What are…!”

I move to attack Emilia.

What?

Emi, Chiho, roll perception.

3.

10.

Emi is too absorbed in her fight with her masked foe to notice you. Chiho, however, does notice you.

I attempt to warn Emi. 7.

Emi hears your warning, but only after Suzuno’s attack has already made contact.

I roll 17 for damage.

The gold coloured streak that is Suzuno collides with Emi and sends her flying back with the force of a massive shockwave. She slams against the side of a building and immediately looses consciousness. As she does so, the holy sword falls from her hand, watched by the scythe wielder.

Wouldn’t it be automatically withdrawn into my body under circumstances like this?

Yes, it is, causing your attacker to clip his tongue in annoyance.

I ran over to the downed Emi.

“Yusa! Yusa!!”

I shake her unconscious form as I shout, hoping to rouse her.

Emi lies unresponsive on her stomach.

“Why? Why did you have to _do_ this?! Suzuno! Why?!”

Also how? Like, what did you hit her with?

I’m carrying a large war hammer in my hands.

Which you were keeping where exactly?

I have an ability called the Light of Iron, which lets me transform anything shaped like a cross into a weapon.

Cool.

And I was wearing a cross-shaped hairpin, so I used that.

“You were just like them all along, Suzuno, weren’t you?! Yusa’s just an obstacle in the way to you, just like she was to Olba!”

I look down at you, a pained expression on my face.

“This…this isn’t even fair! If Maou is a demon, what does it make _you_ , stabbing Yusa in the back right when she’s fighting for all of us?!”

I shut my eyes.

“Silence!”

I quickly advance on you, and put a finger on your forehead.

I know this spell. I use my last moments before falling unconscious to try to talk.

“Maou…h…help…”


	40. Chapter 40

“Ooh, there go the cops.”

Nice to know people noticed the weapons out on the street at least. I print out the sales numbers for the day.

While business did pick up over dinner, it wasn’t enough to make up for the loss in sales earlier that day.

The tree decorating gimmick did wonders, but Kisaki’s still going to cut my pay, isn’t she?

The office phone rings.

Thanks for the answer there. I quizzically glance at the clock before picking up the receiver.

“Thank you for calling MgRonald at Hatagaya rail station. This is Maou speaking. How can I help you?”

“Hello? Oh, dear, hello!”

It sounds like a middle-aged woman.

“Is this Sadao Maou, perhaps? The shift supervisor and assistant manager?”

Why does this woman know my entire job title?

“Yes, this is Maou, shift supervisor for the evening… May I ask who’s calling?”

“Oh! Well, my goodness, I’m very sorry! I was just surprised… I didn’t think you’d actually be the one answering the phone! Hee-hee-hee-hee!”

Do I have another fan or something? Really, who is this woman?

This is Chiho Sasaki’s mother.”

Ah. That would explain it.

“Thank you for taking such good care of her in there!”

“Uh… W-well, thank you very much. You’re Chi…er, Ms. Sasaki’s mother, then? It’s good to hear from you!”

I bow as I speak.

She can’t actually see you, you know. There’s no reason for you to bow to her.

It’s a reflex.

One that almost causes you to hit your head on the drink dispenser.

“I do have to apologize, though. I understand Chiho’s been causing assorted trouble for you as of late? Let me tell you, it was quite the surprise this morning, her coming home with a bicycle I’d never seen before! Ah, well, Chiho, you know… It’s not that she never helps out around the house, but she’s certainly never prepared that much food by herself before, so, you _knoooow_ , if anything was undercooked or tasted off to you, don’t be afraid to come out and say it, all right? Because I taught her everything I could think of, but whenever I offered to help, she turned all red and said she didn’t need me around, so I just kind of let her do her own little thing!”

“Ah…yes… Well, I do appreciate it immensely. It was a truly delicious meal.”

You sound like you’re having issues here.

You love pointing out that I’m apparently hugely oblivious, so why it is surprising to you that I don’t know how to respond to the mother of the teenage girl apparently smitten with me?

“Oh, my, my, my! I do apologize of I’m making you feel, you know, on the spot or anything! I know it’s not a, ah, _serious_ relationship or anything even _close_ to that, but that girl, you know, she’s always taken to her father, and it’s not that she’s never been friends with another boy before, but I tell you, I’ve never _seen_ her work so hard on something like that before, so… Well, it makes a mom proud, you know? Seeing that. Oh, but I’m sorry, you’re still working, aren’t you?”

“No, er… I apologize.”

“Is Chiho still working over there?”

“Huh? Is…she not home yet?”

“Well, I told her to go buy some milk for us at the convenience store on the way home, but she still isn’t back yet, so I thought she was just, you know, hanging out over there after work again.”

“Um, Mrs. Sasaki?”

“Oh, dear, there’s hardly any need to be so formal! Ooh. I’ve never had a young male friend of my daughter call me that before!”

“I’d like you to relax and stay at home until your daughter gets back.”

I attempt to use demonic hypnosis on her. 17 that it works.

She falls silent, and hangs up without another word.

I hang up the phone.

A crew member walks up to you.

“What’s up? Chi isn’t home yet or something?”

“Doesn’t sound like it. She’s probably just out somewhere, I bet.”

“Yeah. She had those friends with her, too, right?”

Satisfied, the employee goes into the kitchen.

I hurry into the staff break room and check my phone.

You have one missed call from about an hour ago, from Chiho, that rang as long as your provider would allow.

I try calling her back.

After a minute and a half, the phone goes to voicemail.

I try again.

The same thing happens.

I try again.

Again, the same thing happens.

Perhaps it's time you tried something else?

I try calling Emi.

That wasn’t what I meant.

Again, you get voicemail. And before you try it again, you should know that you are going to keep getting voicemail not matter how many times you call.

“Crap…!”

“Maou? Oh, Maou?”

The employee from before is carrying the portable handset from the office phone.

“There’s a phone call for you.”

“From Chi?!”

“N-no, uh, it’s from a Mr. Urushihara.”

That took long enough, I was wondering if you’d forgotten about it.


	41. Chapter 41

“…Hello?”

“Oh, Maou? Yo, it’s me!”

“What the hell are you calling the office phone number for?! Where are you even calling from?”

Is the staffer still in earshot?

No.

Damn, it would have been funny to hear his reaction to that.

“Well, what? I know you never pick up your cell phone during work. I’m callin’ from home, what’s so bad about that?”

“From home?! When the hell did you buy a phone?! You _had_ that kind of money?!”

And if you did, where from?

“I don’t have a phone, dude. You think I’m loaded or something? I’m using SkyPhone. You know, SkyPhone?”

“What’s SkyPhone?”

Because you know Maou would have absolutely zero idea that such a thing even exists.

“Basically, it’s a phone you can use over the Internet, It’s practically free to use, and you can even call landline phones with it. Like, signing up with a phone company is so last year, you know?”

Your character hasn’t even been on Earth that long!

“All right. Fine. As long as it’s not messing up our finances. So what do you want?”

“Jeez, you don’t have to be so passive-aggressive like that. Ashiya asked me to find some inside info on Sentucky Fried Chicken, so I found it. You happy?”

“Yeah, yeah, sorry. But I’m kind of busy right now. I’ll ask you about it at home.”

“Wait! You sure about that? You know, Sentucky… Something’s really effed up about it.”

Don’t you go wasting the fantastic rolls I made to get this information.

“Ah?”

“That location’s managed by a guy named Mitsuki Sarue. The one with the Hatagaya address is, anyway. That’s the one, right?”

“Yeah, I suppose.”

“Well the employee profile on the site says that Sarue’s five foot eleven and used to play rugby in college. He look like that to you?”

“…It said what? That’s gotta be someone else’s profile. He was this little shrimpy dude, just about as tall as you are. He looked like he’d be more at home trying to hook up with chicks at a sleazy Kabukicho bar than stiff-arming dudes on a rugby field.”

“Oh, so you’re calling me shrimpy now? Thanks a lot.”

Well you _are_.

Do you want the info or not? I’m perfectly capable of just hanging up on you.

“Anyway, Sarue’s a pretty rare last name, so when I checked the personal logs on Sentucky’s HQ site based outta Shibuya, that was the only Sarue on the whole list.”

“Uh…wow, what the heck kinda sites were you accessing?”

You’d better hope none of them end up getting us arrested.

“And that’s not all. According to the HQ logs, Sarue’s supposed to be working in the advertising department. _Those_ logs list someone totally different as the manager at Hatagaya. Someone named Tanaka. A girl!”

“Hohh…”

Your information’s nice and all, but I would really like if you could help with the crisis at hand a bit more.

I have a computer. They can do a lot of things.

“Hey, uh, is there any way to, like, look up where somebody is right now if you have their cell number? Anything as useful as that?”

“Why’d you ask? I guess so, but I’d have to look.”

“There _is_?!”

Now that’s what I was talking about!

“But I don’t have anything like that right _now_ , and figuring that stuff out is probably gonna take a ton of time. I don’t even know if this piece-of-crap PC can handle it or not…”

“All _right_! Sorry it’s such a piece of crap! Jeez!”

But it’s a piece of crap you didn’t spend a cent of your own money on, so you could at least be grateful for _that_.

“But, like, what, you want to know where somebody is?”

“Yeeaaahh, kind of…”

“‘Cause if it’s Emilia, I could probably tell you.”

“What?!”

“Well, yeah. I kinda stuck a tracker in her shoulder bag. A hidden GPS transmitter.”

“A hidden…GP…what?”

You really need have Maou spend some time learning about the 21st century.

“Uh…well, just imagine one of those little bugging devices you see in movies. They use ‘em to track wild animals and migrating birds and stuff, you know? They tell you what kind of path whoever’s carrying it is taking, and how much time it took to do it.”

“When did you do that?”

“Back a coupla days ago. I put it under the bottom layer of her bag so she wouldn’t notice it right away. Plus, you had to have noticed by now, right, Maou?”

That you put a tracker in Emi’s bag? Why in the world would I have noticed that?

“Like, how Suzuno’s not exactly a normal Japanese woman?”

Oh, that.

“You didn’t say anything, so I figured I’d play along, but you know, what reason would anyone have to move into this building unless they were seriously short on cash? I mean, there’s _nothing_.”

“…You’re more observant than I thought.”

I mean, I kinda lost hope after you completely missed her moving in.

“I don’t know if Emilia’s noticed, though, and that’s why she’s getting chummy with her. But our landlord isn’t really normal, either, right? A regular human being signing a lease with that lady and moving right next to us… You’d have to be crazy to think that was just your typical tenant.”

Especially since she’s a PC and all, but it would have been suspicious even if she wasn’t.

“So… the udon noodles and other stuff Suzuno made for us…”

“Well, duh, I _am_ still an angel, remember? Fallen or no, holy power isn’t gonna mess up _my_ body. I ate everything you gave me. It didn’t hurt you at all, Maou?”

“Hey, the worse it is for you, the better it tastes, right?”

“ _That’s_ your take on it?”

You knew I was poisoning you food, and happily ate it anyway?

“It’s not like she’s flailing away at us the way Olba did. I’m not enough of a prick to complain about whatever someone feeds me, and hey, it helps us save some cash. I figured we’d use her for as long we could get away with it.”

Nice to know I was so meaningful to you guys.

“Yeah, but isn’t it kind of like the documentary about the guy who ate burgers every day just to see what would happen?”

“You know, Ashiya used to bring up that film all the time when he lectured me. I think he’s a huge fan or something.”

I chuckle to myself.

“What’s he doing right now, by the way?”

He would be the one to act on the fact that the neighbour is poisoning our food.

“Well, he got home, ate some udon, and now he’s grunting and groaning on the crapper.”

“…Oh.”

You clearly underestimated the lengths he would go to to save money.

“I think he was getting pretty suspicious of Suzuno, too, though. It’s just that you never said anything, so I guess he kept quiet because it was helping keep the lights on.”

Like I said, he would poison his idiot self to save money.

“…I’m glad he’s got faith in me, but dude, he doesn’t have to ruin his health just to save a few yen.”

“Yeah, seriously. So that’s why I snuck that GPS transmitter in there, but Emilia hasn’t done anything suspicious at all, really, so I turned the tracker off a while ago.”

“Huh. All right. I gotcha. So you can use that to see where she is now?”

“Probably. The battery’s gonna run out pretty soon, I think… Whoa.”

“Whoa, what?”

“So she was at the intersection between MgRonald and our place, then all of a sudden she’s moving in a straight line. Like, right through buildings and stuff, like she’s flying or something.”

“Where’s she going?”

“Tokyo city hall, it looks like. The GPS signal’s been hovering around building number one, the main one, for a while now.”

“…Great. That’s all I need to know. Way to actually help out for a change.”

“‘For a change’ is kinda mean, you know.”

“By the way, how much did that track editor or whatever cost you?”

You hear the sound of the toilet flushing and an old, sticky door opening.

“It’s a _tracker_ , dude. Uh, Ashiya’s back out now, so I don’t really want to say, but…”

“I got your back on this one, I promise. Just tell me.”

“I got it from an Akihabara online store for…uh, forty thousand…on your card.”

I faint in shock form your purchasing habits, causing the sound of something heavy falling to echo across the phone line.

“Well, at least you’re honest. I don’t know what Ashiya’s gonna say, and I’m not sure I wanna know what you bought that thing for in the first place, but you got my permission. You really helped me out tonight.”

“I’d kinda appreciate it if you could get home ASAP and tell Ashiya that. I’m a little scared…”

“Can’t. Not done working yet. But thanks. See you.”

“Whoa, wait, Mao -”

I hang up the phone, ignoring your pleas.

Fine, just don’t be surprised if you come home and find my corpse.

That would be one way to keep you from spending the household’s money as you see fit.

“I don’t want you bums following me, either. Not with all your demonic energy drained.”

And whose fault is that?

“You’d just get hurt. A good supervisor needs to watch over the condition of his staff.”

I take a deep breath.

“If this is just Emi getting sidetracked, she’s gonna have some _serious_ explaining to do.”

I take a look around the room.

The break room is the same as ever, tables, cleaning-supply closet…

I take a mop out of the closet and leave the break room.

One of the crew members notices.

“Huh? Are we cleaning the floors already, Maou?”

“Well, uh…yeah. I need to go out for a bit.”

“What? With a mop? Where?”

“There’s something annoying me that I need to clean up.”

“Um, I’m not quite sure what you… Ah! Maou, wait a sec!”

I ignore the employee and run across the dining area.

“Maou!”

“Don’t worry! I promise I’ll come back!”

“I don’t care about that! Just don’t leave us in here!”

I mount the Dullahan and ride down the street, mop held firmly in hand.


	42. Chapter 42

“Hmm… So the angel refuses to fall that easily.”

“Just…give it up already. I’m not resisting you. You just can’t do it. So can you try again some other time?”

If practically draining me dry of holy energy hasn’t made the sword materialize yet, it’s probably not going to.

Are you seriously trying to argue setting details with the GM? You know, the person who _made_ the details?

“Just…give it up already. Release me and Chiho.”

Can we all meditate for a moment on the fact that, in two campaigns, Chiho has been kidnapped _twice_? It’s become like her job or something.

“I’m afraid that won’t be happening. In fact, I plan to have this lovely little lady help me out in more than a few ways.”

“…You worked in front of MgRonald so you could hit on women, Sarue?”

“Ah. You noticed.”

You made it abundantly clear.

“Women are a lot more sensitive to stupid men and their exhibitionist streaks than you think.”

“Fair enough. I did call myself Sarue. However…”

He raises a hand to remove his ski mask.

“My true name is Sariel. Sariel the archangel.”

…I suppose it would make sense to have angels lined up as enemies given most of the PCs were demons up until recently. But what’s with Sariel’s powers?

I didn’t make him up until you joined the campaign.

What made you think I would end up in a position to fight an angel? Because I doubt you had that much of the current scenario planned out in advance.

You’d be surprised about how much I planned out actually, but Sariel mostly came from wishful thinking, I admit. Having removed his ski mask, Sariel reveals his boy-like visage, purple eyes highlighted by multiple splotches of orange paint.

And here I thought he looked ridiculous with the ski mask _on_.

“I didn’t know orange eyeshadow was all the rage in heaven right now.”

“Heh… It’s proven quite obstinate.”

“Wouldn’t be much of a crime deterrent if it came off that easily, you know?”

“Hmph. It is of no great concern to me. I needed those sunglasses to hide my purple eyes anyway.”

From who?

Us, presumably. My guess is he figured you or Maou would find them suspicious.

“You got a lot more issues to tackle than _that_ , I’d say.”

“You know, you really had me concerned. Such a powerful weapon, being bandied around on another world. And now I reek and my beautiful face looks like an orange panda’s. I honestly considered taking my own life at one point.”

But that would have cut the plot short, and of course we couldn’t have _that_.

“I failed to defeat you, I allowed you to regroup with the Devil King, and I almost had to miss work on our opening day. Quite the ordeal, I can tell you. But!”

He smiles and turns towards Suzuno.

“Thanks to _you_ , I managed to capture her without even breaking a sweat. And look at the lovely bonus prize I found! Chico Sasaki. Quite a valuable sample, you know. A girl from another world who knows of the Devil King, and yet desires nothing more than to be close with him. She will provide us with untold research into the Devil King’s powers affect the human mind!”

I think her mother might make a better sample at this point, since Maou hypnotized her and all.

“You were listening in on us at that intersection?!”

“Psh. You could at least by kind enough to call it ‘spying’.”

I wrinkle my nose in response.

This action earns you another blast from the Evil Eye of the Fallen.

“Nngh!”

“The holy sword is not something meant to be wielded by a human. Before it returns to the people of Ente Isla, we must pluck it out from you with our own hands. Such is the consensus of all of heaven, you see.”

He unleashes another blast of light.

“Aaaaaaahhh!”

“Hmm. No dice, then?”

I finally arrive at the building and roll…15… to disrupt the barrier.

“…Oh?”

He walks to the edge of the heliport. He looks down, and laughs.

“Well, well! Look at the little gnat who blundered his way in here.”

My head darts upwards.

I’m attempting another recovery roll…6 damn.

You are able to weakly call the name of your crush as you struggle in your sleep, if that’s any consolation.

“I couldn’t say how he penetrated my barrier, but there’s no need to show him an improper welcome. Is there, Bell? He doesn’t have any of his putrid little underlings with him. Even you could defeat the Devil King easily enough at this point.”

I flash an uneasy look at Emi.

“There’s nothing to fear. This building is bathed in the glow of my moonlight. There is none of that nasty negative energy for the Devil King to harness. Go.”

I dejectedly follow his words, walking to the edge of the roof, unable to defy the words of an angel.

“…This is what you want?”

I gasp and stand motionless.

“You want the Hero with the Holy Sword and the Devil King to meet their end on an alien world? For Ente Isla to be the exact same as it was before you came here? For peace to reign as if nothing happened? Does that work for you?”

“What could be troubling you? What you are doing is right. It is just. I, the symbolic leader of the Reconciliation Panel, guarantee it. Now, go. A word or two from me, and no one in the Church could ever lay a finger on you. You have nothing to fear. Besides, this was the plan from the start, wasn’t it? We’re just a bit behind schedule, is all. Ente Isla will enjoy an era of peace. One free of the Devil King’s looming presence. One where the myth of the Hero with the holy sword shall be passed down for generations to come. You and I, Bell… We merely came to tie up the loose ends. There is no need for the audience to see all the furor and confusion behind the curtain.”

I steel myself to attack the Devil King, spurred on by his words.

I attempt another recovery roll. 10, finally.

“Suzuno…”

“…Chiho.”

I have tears streaming down my face.

“Why…why…?”

I don’t look at you. I bring my hand up to my head and remove my cross-shaped hairpin.

“…Light of Iron.”

The hairpin transforms itself into a golden war hammer. Hammer in hand I leap towards the ground.

“Please…help me…already…I don’t want to sacrifice anyone else!!”


	43. Chapter 43

13 on a perception check.

You notice Suzuno barrelling towards you, war hammer in hand.

“Whooaaarrghh!”

I swing my hammer downwards, aiming at Maou below me.

14 to dodge the blow.

You are able to leap away from the blow just as Suzuno brings her hammer down.

“Damn! That was close! What the hell! You want me to die here?!”

And what about Dullahan?

Huh?

My trusty stead, I was riding him.

Dullahan, being a _bike_ , was unable to dodge Suzuno’s attack. Roll for the damage you deal.

20\. I’m pretty sure that’s a crit.

It is, here roll these.

That’s…a 6 and a 9.

Doing the math…Dullahan is flattened by Suzuno’s hammer blow.

“Ah. Du…”

“Du?”

“Duuuuuuuuuullahaaaaaaaaannnnnnnn!!!!”

Dude, go easy on the yelling would you?

I clutch Dullahan’s remains to my chest.

“Suzuno, you incredible, incorrigible incompetent! What the hell did you do _that_ for?! Do you have grudge against Dullahan or something?! Give me back the two months I spent with this guy! And after that, give me a new bike, too! And the registration fees! And help me pay the bulk-garbage fee to give this guy a decent burial!”

“Shut up!”

I swing again, aiming for your head.

12 to dodge.

You dodge in a panic, and watch as the hammer swings by your nose.

“Agh!”

You interrupted my eulogy for Dullahan.

There’s more important things going on right now.

A beloved NPC companion of mine just died, I’d say that’s plenty important!

“Whoa, whoa, wait! Time out!”

“Silence!”

Like Suzano’s going to sit there and listen to you mourn your bike.

“Dude, dude, listen to me for a…”

“Silence, silence, _silence_!”

“Aaagggh!”

I turn my back on you and run.

“Halt! Devil King Satan!”

“The hell I’m halting! _You_ stop first! Please!”

I already said there’s no way she’s letting you mourn the bike.

This isn’t about Dullahan!

“One minute! C’mon, just one minute!”

I hold my index finger in the air.

I stare at you, bewildered.

Thank you. I put the mop on the ground.

That wasn’t a yes.

And begin to remove my clothes.

_What_?!

Are you trying to seduce Suzuno or something?

No.

Then why are you taking off your clothes?!

I take off my work polo, revealing the fading shirt below. Next goes my belt, and my work pants. Once I take off my cap, I carefully fold my clothes and place them next to the path. Then I pick the mop back up, and turn towards you.

“Okay, now I’m ready.”

“Wh-what are you _doing_?!”

“Hah! Like some unemployed ditz like you would ever understand.”

I look towards my folded up uniform.

“Listen, I don’t _own_ those. MgRonald _loaned_ those to me! If I get ‘em messed up for nonword reasons, I’m gonna have to pay restitution, all right? And the Devil’s Castle kinda doesn’t have that sort of surplus cash sitting around right now!”

“Wha…!”

“Also, what are _you_ doing, huh?! Where do you get off, getting my employees caught up in this?!”

I point at you with my mop.

“I didn’t want to go hard on you. You had guts, moving in right next to me like that, and you’re a hell of a good cook. But if you screw around with my job and hurt my crewmates, you’re gonna have one pissed-off assistant manager to deal with!”

“What…!”

I charge at you with the mop.

11 to dodge.

You fall back as he thrusts the mop head towards you face.

I deflect with my hammer, 11.

The middle of your hammer succeeds in deflecting the mop head.

I prepare a counter swing.

I make a giant leap backward, augmented by my magic, in an attempt to dodge Suzuno’s blow. 10.

Your jump lands you on a streetlamp, but your shirt is torn by Suzuno’s hammer.

My eyes follow him.

Your eyes catch sight of the lower part of his body as he stands on the streetlight.

“This…this is no time for _that_ , you perverted monster!”

That wasn’t my fault!

“You don’t like it? Blame yourself!”

Your shirt, damaged in the fight, gets caught by the wind and blows off your body in pieces.

“So you retained some demonic power all along. Did you not, you sexually deranged Devil King?”

“Yeah, well, there was no telling when someone like you would come along. They call it a trump card because you don’t show it until the very end.”

“…When did you notice that I was not Japanese?”

Since apparently the act was obvious to some people.

“The moment I first saw you, when did you think?”

And apparently to you as well.

“No Japanese person in her right mind would start caring for this bunch of destitute schlubs living next to her moment she moved in! Not even some samurai-era Japanese beauty like you! And sure, it made me happy, but before that, it was incredibly sketchy, you know?”

“What…what do you care about Chiho, then?!”

“I taught Chi everything from A to Z about the job! She’s my right-hand girl now! And if you thought it was some kind of thin, fragile relationship, you’ve _seriously_ got the wrong idea!”

I jump down onto the ground.

“But it’s too bad, huh? I thought you had some potential, trying to take us on by yourself and getting all chummy with Emi. But you’re just another Olba, aren’t you? Long as you can score some power, you don’t care what sacrifices you have to make along the way, yeah? You don’t care how much of a hypocrite it makes you. If I let someone like you slay me, the sheer patheticness of it all would make me cry. What makes you guys different from all us demons?”

“S-silence…!” 

“Not gonna happen. I’m demon, and I just _love_ making people despise me. So answer me! Tricking Emi, getting Chi involved… Aren’t you even a _little_ ashamed of yourself?!”

“Siiiilennnnnnce!”

I swing my hammer at you again.


	44. Chapter 44

4 on my dodge roll.

“Yeoow!”

And your damage?

“…Wha?”

10… I really expected you to dodge that.

Maou goes flying, landing on his hands and knees some distance away from you. He’s covered in abrasions from head to toe and coughing up blood.

“Damn…that hurt…Rngh!”

“What are you doing?! Why did you not dodge that?!”

I run up to you.

“I, I tried to, but, but I exhausted my demonic force… I couldn’t release as much power as I thought…”

“Whaaa?!”

“Before I came here…I hypnotized someone over the phone…and I had to get through that barrier over city hall, too… Ah, crap I totally miscalculated this. I thought it’d hold out for a little more than that.”

You know, you could kill him if you hit him one more time. Reunite him with his beloved Dullahan.

“…What? Not gonna do it? It’s your chance…*cough, cough*…to be a hero.”

I don’t do anything but cast my eyes downward.

“Must’ve been real embarrassing for you, huh?”

“…What?”

You’ve said that a lot.

_You’ve_ said and done a lot of unexpected things.

“You want to beat me fair and square, then go home in triumph with Emi. That’s why you used Chi’s phone to call me. You wanted to have me defeat an opponent you were powerless to defy.”

“You…realized that…?”

The hammer disappears from my hands, and is replaced by my hairpin falling to the ground.

“Well, it wasn’t hard to guess. You were proceeding along with your plan, gradually weakening us with your food. You weren’t gonna suddenly go dirty and kidnap those two. If you were gonna do that, you could have poisoned us the normal way. Or, hell, you could’ve killed us any number of other ways and just gone home. You didn’t have to care about Emi.”

The amount you notice is astounding, really.

“Someone able to kidnap the Hero without a struggle wasn't going to just sit pretty while Chi tried calling me for a minute and a half. Whoever did call me, had to be capable of doing it. Jeez, you really hammered me, you know that? You better pay my medical bills if you broke any bones.”

I attempt to stand up.

I assist him.

“…The angel is here.”

“Huh, yeah I guess you couldn’t defy an Ente Islan. What’s he here for?”

“…To recover Emilia’s holy sword, he said.”

“Huh? Without killing me first?”

“I do not know why… He said it was something no human should wield…”

“Well, we can let him deal with that on his time. What about Chi?”

What? That was a pretty major thing you’re just glossing over.

As far as I’m concerned the further away the Better Half is, the better.

_Aaaaauuuugggghhhhh_!!!

I think you just broke the GM.

Nah, this is nothing, you should have heard the racket when I fled Ente Isla. So, anyway, Chi?

“A valuable sample, is how he put it. He wants to make her into a research subject…someone who has feelings for the Devil King, despite full knowledge of his deeds… He wanted to examine her heart, and her mind.”

“…That bastard…You.”

“Wh-what…?”

“Who was it? Who was the puke-ridden psycho-freak bastard who did it?”

“Um…puke-ridden…?”

I grab you by the shoulders.

“I said, gimme the name of that angel bastard who’s trying to kidnap a member of my effin’ staff, dammit!”

_Trying_? He’s succeeded, what you’re on is a rescue mission.

“It, it’s Sariel.”

“…The Evil Eye of the Fallen, huh? Hell, no wonder Emi couldn’t take him.”

“You…know of that?”

We really need to meet that mentor of yours, because I’m assuming it’s through that person that you know of him.

“Yeah, we got some history. It just had to be that womanizing freak, didn’t it? I knew it - Mitsuki Sarue!”

I hurry towards city hall.

“W-wait! Are you going now? You are injured!”

“Of course I am! My precious coworker is quaking in fear waiting for me!”

“You can’t! You’ll be killed! Sariel’s force grows stronger the closer he is to the moon! There’s no way you could defeat him up on the roof, bereft of-”

“So you think I’m gonna run instead?”

I’m starting to think you have a death wish, between this and your brilliant plan last campaign.

“It’s my job to handle crisis management for the crew on my shift. Chi’s a valuable employee. I have to protect her. It’s basically my fault anyway that Sariel chased Emi into this world. I’m not dumb enough to foist that responsibility on someone else and run for the hills. That’s just _shameless_! How the hell an I supposed to conquer this world if I can’t take care of business here? I can’t! So I’m going! And, worst-case scenario, if I can’t beat Sariel, I might be able to get Chi out of there!”

I bring myself to a run.

“Hyaaahhh! Hang on, Chi!”

And enter city hall.

I stand dumbfounded, before turning to the roof.

“Why…why are you doing this? You are a demon! You are the Devil King… How can you even _say_ things like that? If that is the Devil King’s stance, I could hardly allow myself to remain as shameless as I was.”

I take a deep breath, pick up my hairpin off the ground, and fly into the night sky.


	45. Chapter 45

“Hmph… It doesn’t fill me with joy, but so be it. I hate to perform such a grave disservice on a lady, but forgive me. It is simply part of my appointed task. I was expecting my Evil Eye to make the Holy Silver simply divorce itself from your body, but I suppose I will have to directly take it from you instead.”

“Directly…?”

Sariel reaches for the top bottom of your blouse.

“Hey! What’re you doing?!”

“Harvesting the Holy Silver from your body. Oh, but this won’t be a horror-movie scene, so try not to worry about that. Think of it as a type of surgery, one where my holy force will provide all the anesthesia you need…”

“That’s not the problem! I… Stop it! I’ll kill you!”

I fail my head around.

Sariel pays you no heed and succeeds in unbuttoning the top of your blouse.

“Wh-what are you doing to Yusa, you weirdo?!”

Sariel stops for a moment, and turns to look at you.

“Trust me, I would never want to do anything to humiliate a woman. The present situation notwithstanding, I am considered quite the gentleman up in the heavens. But if I had to place my good name against the recovery of our Holy Silver, I’m afraid my mission must take priority.”

“That’s awful! Just awful! Why do all you angels have to be these absolutely horrible people?!”

I think that’s just because you’ve consistently kept running into the assholes. My mom’s nice, at least according to the GM.

“Well, considering your position near the Devil King, I suppose Lucifer is your primary experience with them, is it not? I would prefer you not lump him in with the rest of us, thank you.”

“Urushihara’s a self-serving shut-in creep, but at least he’s not a molester like you!”

Thank you for the _wonderful_ compliment.

You’re welcome.

“Yes, yes, all right. I’ll be happy to listen to your running commentary after we return. So would you mind being quite for a moment?”

“Whoa, not so fast there! What’re you gonna do to Chiho?! You aren’t gonna take her back with you to Ente Isla, are you?!”

“But of course. I have to, if I want to research her.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s a _totally_ normal thing to say…”

He’s an archangel from another world who gets empowered by the moon. I don’t think _normal_ is really a term that applies to him.

Sariel continues to work on your buttons.

“Hey! Don’t touch me!”

“I am a gentleman. I will do my best not to look, so please be quiet. Besides, I am not a fan of, shall we say, ‘petite’ women.”

Did you actually take note of her bizarre outburst last campaign?

“Oh, you are _dead_! You are _so_ dead! And I’m not gonna let you take Chiho away, either! I’ll make sure you regret every single thing you’re doing right now!”

“My, you certainly do make a lot of noise, don’t you? Did you think I was going to take a scalpel to that girl like a lab animal?”

What else would he have been implying? That seems like the creepiest thing he could do in this situation.

“I have nothing but high praise for her beauty. Once my research is complete, I would be more than happy to promote her to the echelon of the angels and greet her as my wedded wife.”

Clearly I was wrong, that’s much creepier.

“I’d rather die!”

“But, of course, I will need to examine her in great detail, from head to toe, before that. I need to know how building a close relationship with the Devil King affects a human being, both in body and in spirit.”

“You’re a hopeless monster! D-don’t touch me! You make me sick, you freak!”

“Molester!”

“Pervert!”

“Die!”

“Psychopath!”

“False angel!”

“Peeping tom!”

“Panty raider!”

“I didn’t go _that_ far!!”

Is he really taking the rest of that as valid complaints?

“Quit it! Both of you! Don’t you understand how easy I’m making this for you?!”

Sariel manifests his scythe and plants the blade square on Emi’s chest.

“If I may say so, I am allowed to place the Holy Silver above Emilia the Hero’s life if need be! I had pity on you, and you repay me with nothing but this incessant blather! I have no qualms with slashing it right out of you, you realize!”

I gasp in response to Sariel’s tirade.

“So? Go ahead. I don’t know how the Holy Silver’s fused into my body, either. It’s just too bad I wouldn’t get to see you all heartbroken after the Silver disappears along with my body.”

Sariel lets out an irritated grunt.

“In that case, I’d be happy to work on this girl first.”

Sariel turns his eyes towards Chiho, scythe still planted firmly on Emi’s chest.

“A human that is intimately tangled with demons. Transporting her to Ente Isla and examining her body may offer us a way to rescue those tormented by the demons of our own land.”

“I dare you lay even a finger on Chiho. You’ll be sorry!”

Sariel cackles and turns back towards you.

“Well, I appreciate your spunk, but what exactly do you think you can do now?”

“Not me.”

“What?”

“I said, if you lay a finger on Chiho, the Devil King’s not gonna let that go.”

He seemed right pissed at him already, really.

And he certainly seems to care a lot more about me than he does the plot.

No kidding.

“The Devil King? So that’s you big reveal? The Devil King? Emilia the Hero pinning her hopes upon the Devil King?! You’ve been in collusion with him the whole time, haven’t you?!”

“No, I haven’t. Didn’t you notice? You were across the street from MgRonald. That girl’s an employee over there, and the Devil King’s her assistant manager and shift supervisor. If an employee’s in danger, it’s the boss’s job to step in.”

“Have you lost your mind, Emilia? Do you truly believe the Devil King would stay beholden to the laws and practices of a human world?”

He has so far. Very strictly, in fact.

“You are fully aware of the Devil King’s current state. A puny weakling with only the barest flicker of demonic force left. Even even if he came here, what could he manage against an archangel like myself?”

“He’s not beholden to anything. He _protects_ it all, all by himself. That’s Sadao Maou for you. Shift supervisor at the Hatagaya rail station MgRonald.”

“Yusa…”

“This is a perfect farce! The Hero, trusting in the Devil King! Heh-heh-heh… Well, where is he? I want to see this human-loving Devil King for myself! Let him take the stage whenever he likes! Not that he even exists!”

I so do, it’s just that _someone_ decided to take out the elevators.

“And not that could even fly up here anyway.”

Man, it would be a lot faster if I could.

“Bell’s Light of Iron would have pounded him to ash by now.”

“I think I have my doubts about that.”

I flash a look at Chiho.

“Chiho, have you ever thought about why you where taken up here?”

“Because Bell followed my orders and took her hostage so you would obey me. What other reason is there? That’s why I made her take everything else from the scene, too, so the police wouldn’t catch our scent.”

I chuckle at Sariel.

“Then shouldn’t Bell have taken Chiho someplace where I couldn’t see her? She’d be a much more effective hostage that way. She kind of loses her value if I don’t have to worry about her safety.”

Don’t you go giving the villain ideas!

“Bell isn’t stupid. Everything she does, she does for a reason. That…and she heads the Reconciliation Panel. The council that reconciles the false teachings of the past. Better watch that your faithful guard dog doesn’t bite the hand that feeds it.”

“What if she does? Then I’d punish her. Simple. And I hardly need to worry anyway. As long as I am an archangel, there isn’t cleric in the Church who would dare defy me.”

Finally!

What?

I managed to get up all those stairs.

“Hahh…hahh…hahh… S-sorry to…to interrupt… Urrgghh…”

What are you doing?

I just climbed to the top of a skyscraper using the stairs. You’d be winded too.

“Why…the hell…isn’t…the elevator working…*huff*…*huff*…”

“Ah… Ah! Maou!”

“Don’t look at me!”

“ _That’s_ how you say hi?!”

“Also, don’t look like _that_! Why are you dressed like that?! Get out of my sight!”

I have to say, you _are_ giving Sariel a run for his money in terms of looking completely ridiculous.

“…Well. This is a surprise.”

Sariel points his scythe towards you.

“You appear quite human to me. Bereft of all your demonic powers. You couldn’t have defeated Bell.”

“…Does it look that way?”

I’m fully aware that Maou is covered in cuts and bruises right now.

“She beat the crap outta me. And who knows what she woulda done _next_ if I let her.”

Since she already mercilessly slew my beloved mount.

You can let that go anytime now.

I would also like to point out that you constantly complained about being reminded about that time you left Lucifer to die.

“This is bewildering to me…but you are far from well, I see. It is an unbelievable sight indeed, but here it is! You are truly no longer the Devil King I once knew, Satan.”

“Yeah, well, I wasn’t expecting the limp-wristed freak across the street who stank of cologne all day to be the Evil Eye, either. Still chasing after all the lil’ girl angels up there?”

“…What?”

“Yep! Heard you’ve been harassing a lot of people. Not that I’m gonna say who.”

You had me worried for a sec, there, you know?

You still want that kept a secret, yes, yes. I’ve been quite good at keeping secret the plot details you don’t want me revealing.

Acting on them is obviously a completely different matter.

I turn towards Emi and Chiho. 

“What did I just say? Don’t look at me!”

I ignore you and direct my attention back to Sariel.

“‘Course, I don’t really care what’s going on with you guys up in heaven anyway.”

Something you have made very clear.

“What I’m worried about right now is the fact you hurt one of my coworkers. You put Chi through a lot of crap, you bastard.”

“Maou!”

“Listen. As far as I’m concerned, until you get back home, you’re still on the clock!”

“…Maou?”

“A manager needs to take responsibility for the safety of his employees when they’re in transit, too! And I’m gonna make you pay for getting my precious staff involved in all this Ente Isla BS!” 

“…Maou…”

“I’m the assistant manager right now. The safety of my crew at work is priority number one! Chi here is a valuable member of my staff! And no Devil King, no shift supervisor, _ever_ abandons his crew!!”

Sure.

“..Ngh.”

And yet again you have managed run roughshod all over Chiho’s feelings without even realizing it. Kudos.


	46. Chapter 46

“I’m afraid I have no clue what you’re talking about. But there is one thing I know for sure…And that’s how foolish you mist truly be, attempting to stymie my mission with that fragile husk.”

Sariel unleashes torrent of holy power.

“I don’t give a crap about your Holy Silver and swords and stuff. In fact, if you’ll help keep that crazy Hero in line for me, go right ahead. All I care about is getting Chi out of here…”

Unfortunately I haven’t been left with many convenient escape routes.

“But it looks like that’s not gonna happen…Jeez. Well, _this_ is great.”

_You_ insisted on coming up here. I tried to stop you.

I’m sure there’s some way to carry Chi and the mop out of here.

Luckily for you you’ve managed to successfully waste time.

What does that mean?

The air around the heliport suddenly grows heavy and humid as a dark cloud forms over the landing zone and begins to push the holy energy back.

Oooohhhh, thaaaat.

“Wh-what is…?”

“This is…making me sick…”

A flash of bewilderment crosses me face, before I realize what, or rather who, must have caused this.

“Oh, hell. I didn’t really feel like helping Emi, but…whatever. Listen up, Sariel. You scared Chi and put blemish on my potential career track. Those’re both high crimes, you know.”

I take a single step towards Sariel.

Sariel screams.

That’s intimidating.

Say what you will about Lucifer, he at least remained more composed than _that_ when fighting Maou.

“This…demonic power! You! Why?!”

“Whoa! Devil King! Knock that off! If you do that now…”

“Quit worrying. These underpants are supposed to stretch to the contours of your body. They ain’t gonna rip, I promise.”

I begin my transformation into demon form.

“Who the hell was asking about you boxers, you dumbass?!”

We have more important issues here.

I complete my transformation and begin stretching out my body.

“Whewwwww…Ahh, feels great. The hell did that bastard _do_ , anyway?”

I fly in from the direction of Shinjuku station, holding my war hammer in my hands.

“You transformed while leaving Chiho in her current perilous state?! You fool!”

“Bell!”

I land next Chiho and form a barrier of holy energy around both of us.

“Pffahh!”

I immediately exhale.

“Whew… That was rough.”

“Are you all right?”

“Y-yes… Oh! Suzuno!”

“I apologize. I will explain later. For now…”

I turn towards the Devil King.

“Allow me to take advantage of the one you hold dear, Chiho.”

“Bell! Have you gone mad?!”

“You are the only madman here, Sariel.”

I keep Chiho behind me.

“Pushing a false peace upon our people; planting the seeds of chaos in another world; backstabbing the very people whose faith we rely on, and must protect… Is this the truth the gods hold for us?! As chief inquisitor of the Reconciliation Panel, I refuse to overlook such a shameful, deceitful truth!”

“And you would even link hands with the Devil King for it?! Your ‘reconciliation’ means nothing to me! You are a demon yourself! A tainted demon, driven by your inquisitor’s thirst for blood!”

“Silence! The Devil King’s life on Earth as Sadao Maou, at least, does not run afoul of the justice that we seek!”

“Whoa, thanks. Guess I’m the big man at MgRonald after all, huh? You know, though, I’d say the Hero and the angels have been the real villains here lately. I’m just sittin’ here living life day by day, you know?”

I take another step.

This one bores a hole into the heliport, and causes Sariel to fly backwards to safety.

“Bell…what did you have to do to gather all this evil force…?”

“Tonight…the men and women using Shinjuku station have my pity.”

“Uh?”

“Wha?”

“Huhh?!”

“What did they call them? Electrical transformers? There were these power lines between the tracks that lead to all of those, and I sliced a few of them in half. I figured stopping the trains would create a storm of anger across the area…”

“Dude, that’s a terrorist attack!”

You’re the Devil King.

Does that really seem like something he would _do_ at this point, though?

“Do…do you have any idea many trains go through Shinjuku?! Like even if you count Japan Rail lines alone, that’s gonna affect nearly every single service in greater Tokyo!”

“Ah. I see. Then my guess was correct. I am glad to see my missionary training wasn’t for naught. It is quite annoying if the transport wagons in Ente Isla fail to arrive at their appointed times, after all, yes? I assumed that delaying so many trains at once would create an aura of rage that could transform into demonic force…”

“I’m not praising your analytical skills, okay?! I’ve never even _been_ on one of those dumb wagons!”

Your comeback sends a wave of demonic energy across the heliport, hitting the barrier protecting Chiho and almost knocking her off the heliport.

“Aagh! M-Maou! Please, be careful!”

“Sorry, sorry…”

“Oh, but know, Maou…or Devil King, maybe? Or Satan? Ooh, I don’t even know what I should be calling you!”

“We, uh, we can figure that out later. Yo, Sariel. Little freak over there. Nobody’s gonna accuse me of being merciless tonight. Lemme give you a choice. Either you turn you tail and run back home, or you accept your punishment and let me beat the tar out of you. Which is it?”

“It’s obvious. Devil King Satan! I will defeat you fulfill my mission!”

Sariel focuses his holy magic as the moon frames his body.

“What do I have to fear from a Devil King who can only regain his powers after getting doped up on the negative energy of humans?!”

“Man, shut _up_ , happy hands.”

“Thunderwing Moonlight!!”

A laser-like beam of light navigates it’s way among the assembled women before bearing down on Maou.

“I wouldn’t sass a Devil King at full power, man.”

I raise my arms to repulse and catch the ball of light.

Catch?

Yep. 16.

Repulsing the light only takes you a single moment of concentration, and the energy is now balled up in one of your palms.

“Wh-what…?!”

“Pfft. Bet you’re missing your home-field advantage right now. Something tells me you’ve sorely overestimated your strength. Let me show you what you’re really worth. Guess the Evil Eye of the Fallen made you feel a lot more powerful than that, huh? You never fought against who didn’t run on holy power, did you?”

I toss the small mass of energy back at Sariel.

“What?!”

Sariel fires a bolt of purple from his eyes to send the attack scattering.

“That ability of yours makes you pretty much invincible against any holy force user, I’m betting…”

I summon a ball of black fire and throw it at Sariel. 15.

“But when you’re faced with some other kind of power, you’re utterly clueless. Should’ve chosen someone else to pick on, huh?”

The black mass connects with Sariel, covering his entire body in fire.

12 on damage, but don’t forget the lingering damage from being on fire.

I won’t.

“Grraaaghhhh!!!”

“I’d suggest you sell those chicken wings of yours, but it’d probably make Sentucky’s sales plummet.”

I snap my fingers once and disperse the flames.

The dispersal reveals a plainly charred Sariel.

“Oop.”

I swing my mop down on Sariel’s neck. 14.

It breaks the mop in the middle of the handle, but Sariel is knocked unconscious by the blow and falls onto the concrete of the heliport.


	47. Chapter 47

The cross Emi is bound to dissipates, and sends her plummeting towards the pavement.

I move to catch her. 13.

You catch her just before she lands.

“And…oop. Whadya think, Emi?”

“…Think of what…”

“I’m here to catch you, You could appreciate that a little, huh?”

Are you phishing for a complement from me or something?

“…I have to. I can’t do anything else.”

I chuckle to myself, then place you on the ground.

“Huh?”

I pat my chest to illustrate my point.

“Dude, your top. Button it up. Pfft…!”

Oh… I take off one of my shoes and throw it at his face. 12.

It hits squarely.

“Oww! Look, demon or not, that still hurt!”

I throw the other shoe. 11.

That one hits his forehead.

“…Agh!”

“I _told_ you not to look!”

I wrap an arm around my chest, face beaming red. Then I begin to button my shirt back up.

I turn around long enough for you to do that.

“That’s _your_ fault for spacing out in the first place! I was kind enough to warn you, remember! Besides, it’s not like showing them off is gonna make ‘em even smaller, so-”

I hit him over the head with my war hammer. 9.

“- _gaghhh_! You…bast…ard…!”

“My apologies. I simply felt that too difficult to listen to.”

That’s something I wish I could do sometimes.

You could.

Not in character I couldn’t. Sadly.

“Uhmm, look, guys, you beat that creepy guy and all, so could you stop arguing for…”

“What?!”

“What do you want?”

We turn towards you.

“Um…I’m sorry.”

“Man, why did I even bother rescuing either of you, huh? I shoulda snatched up Chi and hightailed it outta here! Boy, did I blow it! Gate, open!”

What are you doing?

Opening a Gate, what does it look like?

*sigh* A Gate erupts to life before you, just large enough for a single person to pass through.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa! You aren’t going back now, are…”

“Yeah, I’d sure like to! But you know that’s not gonna happen!”

I pick Sariel up and toss him in the Gate.

“Ahhh!!”

“Devil King! What are you…”

“Maou?!”

“I’m not gonna kill him or anything. He’s still got most of his power left. Maybe he’ll wind up someplace livable, if he’s lucky. Who knows if he’ll make it back to Ente Isla from there, though?”

Wait, you’re _not controlling where Sariel goes_?!

Nope.

So you’re going to make me…*grumble*

That’s…a lot of dice. And charts.

Undirected Gate travel requires a fairly complex series of rolls. And then we need the charts to know what they mean.

Plus, I have to keep in mind any spells or such that might affect how the Gate functions… Huh.

What?

Just where Sariel ended up. It’s interesting, is all.

I shrug.

“Gate! Close Sesame! Or whatever!”

The Gate pops out of existence. And with it’s conjurer gone, the barrier of holy magic Sariel had around the heliport disappears as well.

I turn towards the others.

“You aren’t blaming me, are you? Keeping him around would just cause more trouble for us, but killing him would bring even more trouble down on _me_. That was the best way to do it.”

“Yeah, but…he isn’t just some pile of garbage…”

That’s debatable.

“I’m not too interesting in killing an archangel and setting off a full-scale war with heaven just yet.”

Was that a ‘yet’?

“And if they take this as Sariel screwing up his mission and getting stranded somewhere, then everything works out. Everything except his rep, I guess.”

That _was_ a yet.

You seem happy.

Things are suddenly looking up for my plot.

“So! Now for the real problem.”

I clap my hands once, and give Suzuno a stern look.

“We gotta clean this whole thing up. Let’s move, Bell.”

“Clean up?”

“Don’t just go, _Cleanup in aisle seven_ , dude! You can’t stop every train in Tokyo and go, _Oops, sorry!_ afterward! There’s gonna be a ton of electrical lines and transformers to repair, and now that Sariel’s barrier is gone, someone’s probably gonna be up here before long. So let’s go! I need to get back anyway. I can’t leave MgRonald before closing it!”

I just stand there, flummoxed, the sight of the king of all demons acting this way being too much for me.

“Oh, right. Emi?”

“Wh-what…?”

I take a quick look at Chi.

“Get Chi back home. For real this time. Her mom’s worried about her.”

“I always knew you were a good guy, Maou.”

“Ah, jeez, get outta here.”

I shoo you away with my hands.

“I’m royalty, you know? Kind of a big deal? I like to treat my underlings right, and if I’m gonna conquer this land, I wanna make sure it’s all nice and neat first.”

“That all sounds fine to me for now.”

I flash a smile at you.

“Ugghhhh! Let’s just go, Bell!”

I grab you back your kimono’s collar.

“Ah, wait, why are grabbing me-”

I lift you up and fly off.

“- _aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh_ …”

“Hey…Yusa?”

I watch then fly off for a little while, before furrowing my brows at Chiho.

“Let’s just leave it at that for today. But only today, all right?”

I snicker a bit in response.

“In that case, could I ask you a favour, Yusa?”

“…What’s that?”

“Maou said he left the MgRonald open. I think he’ll probably be in trouble. _Big_ trouble.


	48. Chapter 48

“Ugh… Why’d do all of that…?”

I lumber out of the taxi.

“Ha-ha…ha-ha-ha-ha! Well, you see…I mean, Chiho mentioned that the Devil King restored the entire Shuto Expressway back to normal, so I wanted to be sure I had a widespread impact. That way, I could be certain you would expend as much demonic energy as possible.”

“You liar. There’s no way you could’ve planned all of this!”

“Yes…well, I cannot easily slice through wiring with my hammer, so I am afraid blunt trauma was the order of the day…”

You levelled the entire transformer building!

All I had was a hammer.

I begin to hurry towards the MgRonald.

“Devil King! What is wrong?”

I chase after you. I still don’t get why you are in such a hurry to get back.

I left work before I closed, and the GM likes to make certain actions have consequences.

Speaking of which… Ms. Kisaki is standing in front of the MgRonald.

“…Now just what is going on here, Maa?”

“Ms…Kisaki…”

“I mean, just…why?”

“I had a phone call…Something happened to Chi.”

“Yes and it sounded like you took a mop, ran out, and never came back. You caused a lot of trouble for a lot of people.”

“I… No, but…”

“You got a lot of guts you know that? The shift supervisor, one who _still_ hasn’t made up for this morning’s losses, cutting work for two hours with out telling anyone where he’s going. What is this, a date? Well? _Is_ it?”

How does she know about all of this?

He really freaked out the staff, and they contacted her and told her what happened.

“That, uh…”

I doubt she’d believe the _real_ reason why I disappeared.

I walk up to Kisaki.

“Mr. Maou rescued me, madam.”

“What?”

She looks up at you.

“…Can I ask who you are?”

“My name is Yusa. I’m friends with Chiho Sasaki, and… And Mr. Maou, too.”

13 that she buys it.

“Maa’s…friend?”

“Yeah. When we were returning home with Chiho and Ms. Kamazuki over there, we were stalked by a molester. We hid, and Mr. Maou wound up rescuing us.”

Isn’t that basically what happened?

Yeah, that’s what makes it a good lie. 17.

“A molester? Oh. You know, I did hear about something happening at an intersection in Sasazuka.”

See?

“We were just three women, and we didn’t have anything to defend ourselves with. It was all we could do to keep ourselves unseen…”

“Yes…she’s, er, Yusa is correct.”

“Suzu…uh, Ms Kamazuki…”

“M-Maou chased the stalker away for us, but he, er, he needed to return to MgRonald because he’d left it empty, so I reasoned, uh, I thought I should accompany him back..”

5.

...Despite the awkwardness of your performance, Ms. Kisaki buys it.

“…Sadao.”

“What…?”

“We wound up bringing Chiho back home. Her mother was waiting for her."

“Oh? Oh. Well, great. Sounds, uh, good.”

I nod lightly.

“…Well, I suppose it’s not your fault, then.”

She resigns herself to the ‘truth’.

“I guess I know I shouldn’t have had teenage girls working dinner alone. You never know what kind of people are out there, waiting to prey on them.”

Here, here.

Ms. Kisaki places a hand on Maou’s shoulder.

“Listen, Maa. You’re a really important part of the team, both for me and the rest of the staff. So try not to get yourself hurt, okay? I’m glad you were brave enough to protect Chi and these two other friends of yours, but if you were injured out there, that’s really hurt me…and them.”

“Ms. Kisaki…”

“I hope today’s been a constructive experience for you…and I hope you understand how these girls feel, too.”

She rests her eyes on Suzuno.

“Thank you for bringing Maa…I mean, Maou…back for me. Why don’t you take a break inside? I’ll get some coffee going. You, too.”

She gestures to Emi.

“What do you think?”

“Oh, I think we should…”

Something about this seems vaguely suspicious.

“Ah, just have a drink. It’s weird how good the coffee at the Mag tastes when Ms. Kisaki makes it.”

I exchange a glance with Suzuno.

“Ahh, don’t be silly. The coffee tastes exactly the same no matter who prepares it.”

She chuckles lightly at Maou before turning towards the girls.

“How about it?”

“Well, if you’re offering…”

You all enter the dining area. He-he-he-he-he-he-he.

That’s…extremely ominous.

I’m of half a mind to just take the girls and run out of the restaurant.

“Ms…Ms. Kisaki!”

A crew member dashes out into the room, his face pallid.

“Oh, Maou, you’re back! Oh, uh, but we got another problem right now!”

He’s waving his hands all over the place.

“Calm down! Nobody on my crew needs to get all panicky like that! Just tell me what happened, and keep it short!”

“Yes, Ms. Kisaki! Someone fell out of the refrigerator!”


	49. Chapter 49

What?

“There was this guy in the fridge, and his clothes are all charred and stuff! I think he’s unconscious, but what should we do?”

“Oh, no _way_!”

I take off towards the fridge.

“Hey! Maa, hang on!”

Sariel is lying on the floor, half outside the refrigerator.

“Gehh! Wh-what the hell?!”

Why was Sariel in the _fridge_?!

That’s where the Gate dropped him off.

Why would the Gate open in the fridge?!

“Maou! That sasa tree…”

Bingo, the spell you put on it to attract customers into the store reacted with the Gate and so Sariel wound up here. Sariel begins to groan and wiggle on the ground, fighting to regain consciousness.

Crap! I’m all out of magic!

And I really can’t do anything either, thanks to his stupid ability!

Relax, I’m not going to have you fight him again.

Why not?

He’s served his purposed for the moment, which is introducing some plot points to you. Now I need to figure out how to make all of you actually _care_ about them.

So what do you plan to do with Sariel in the meantime?

Just watch. Ms. Kisaki moves to confront Sariel, as the rest of you seem to have, in her eyes, inexplicably panicked.

“Who…might _you_ be?”

Sariel’s head rises up, an almost drugged look on his face.

“…You’re…beautiful…”

“…Pardon?”

“The goddess of beauty… She existed in another world…”

“…I’m afraid I’m not quite sure what you’re saying.”

“Sariel, you couldn’t have…”

This is really what you’re going with?

Hell yes it is.

“Ahhhh! Such sweet destiny! Such a wondrous miracle! Here, in Japan, I’ve stumbled upon the goddess of beauty! Oh, by all the gods in heaven! My body burns with the flame of forbidden love! I am about to fall from my angelic heights!”

“Who’s _this_ idiot?”

Kisaki sneers at the figure before her. Sariel rises to his knees, and pressing his charred body against her legs.

“Ahh, that worshipful face, looking down upon me from such lofty heights! It makes my heart pulsate like the great bellower that governs the passage of time in the heavens!”

“Can anyone explain this? Who _is_ this weirdo?”

I was starting to think you where just going to keep on going by yourself.

“…Well, he’s kind of the manager at the Sentucky across the street.”

“My beloved icon of beauty, my name is Sarue. I am manager of the Sentucky Fried Chicken location in front of Hatagaya station. The two of us, from two rivals doomed to compete with each other. Truly, we are the Romeo and Juliet of the fast-food industry!”

“…Freak.”

“No matter how vulgar and abusive the words that spill out of your supple lips be, they ring like the great orchestras of heaven in my ears! I would gladly fling my body into the fire and brimstone of hell if it would make your eyes turn towards mine! What kind of fragrant rose would serve as your equal, my sweet flower of love?”

“…Can someone translate this guy into Japanese for me?”

“I, uh, I think he’s saying he’ll do anything you say, Ms. Kisaki.”

Sariel nods proudly at you interpretation.

“…All right. Get over here.”

Sariel drags himself before Kisaki’s feet, as he approaches, her heel plants itself in his face.

“Aaaaahhhh! The height of ecstacy! Oh, may all the gods in heaven forgive me! I remove myself from your flock and fling myself into the fires of passion!!”

“You think I’m playing around? Franchise management isn’t some kind of _game_ , you know! What is _with_ that loony panda makeup? And what’s with that oil drum of cologne you threw over your head?! Is _that_ what Sentucky expects from it’s managers?!” 

Ms. Kisaki’s heel digs itself further into Sariel’s face.

“Ahh, the lure of the fallen! Sure a sweet, fetching scene, one I am no longer able to resist!”

“Shut _up_ , you perv!”

Ms. Kisaki glares at Maou.

“Maa…are you telling me we placed second in customer draw to this idiot?”

“Um…well, no, I…um.”

“Huh. Hope you and everyone else won’t complain when I send you all off to Antigua and Barbuda, then.”

“I, I don’t even know where that is, Ms. Kisaki…”

You wouldn’t dare split us up.

“Well, that was my and your problem to deal with, and we blew it. We’ll both have to volunteer to return our salaries for the day. Ugh. Guess I still have a lot learn, don’t I? Serves me right for whining about that manager training session.”

“W-wait…you’re joking, right, Ms. Kisaki?!”

“I thought I told you, the only time I tell jokes is when I want people to laugh!”

“I’ll laugh all you want! Please! Just tell me your kidding!”

I have a family to support!

“Ugh! Enough! You’re a man! Just accept it! A true samurai rather starve than allow his honour to be tarnished in public!”

“But this is the twenty-first century! I’m just a simple commoner, Ms. Kisaki!”

Except for the times when you’re royalty.

I continue begging Ms. Kisaki to change her mind.

“…Quite a joke, indeed.”

“ _I’m_ sure not laughing. Me, being Maou’s friend… Ugh. That isn’t funny at all. Why did I have to call him by his first name, even?”


	50. Chapter 50

Are we going to turn running a domestic scene to close out the campaign a tradition now? Because this is the second time we’re doing this.

I have something I want to do, so I’m okay with it.

Alright, I open the door to the Devil’s Castle.

I’m already inside, jabbing a pair of food-laden chopsticks into Maou’s cheek.

“S-Suzuno!! What are you doing in here?!”

“Ah, welcome, Sasaki! Just the person I needed. I was attempting to make a tea-flavoured pound cake with this rice cooker. Would you like to try some?”

“Ooh, thanks, Ashiya! I’d love to! …Wait, no!”

I storm in and sit down between Maou and Suzuno.

“What are you doing? Could you avoid being in my way, please?”

“No, what are _you_ doing?! And why are you taking that from her, Maou?!”

“Uhh…”

“Aren’t you two supposed to be enemies, Suzuno?! Where do you get off, inviting yourself into his place and trying to feed Maou like that? It makes me so…jealous…”

“Chihooooo, you might what to filter yourself a little…”

What can I say, I’m trying to be as obvious as possible.

“You stay out of this, Urushihara!”

“Yes. It is as you say. I am, at the core, the enemy of the Devil King. But, while the Devil King may have not intended it at first, he has also performed a great service for me. Thus, I am doing my best to prepare my consecrated ingredients in the most taste-tempting ways possible and pretend to repay his efforts with food while secretly filing the demons’ bellies with damaging holy force…”

“Suzuno, I have no idea what any of that means! Ashiya! Don’t you care about what she’s saying?!”

“I know full well how you feel, Sasaki. Too well, in fact…”

My eyes dart over to Urushihara and I show you a ruled notebook.

“But thanks to Lucifer’s unplanned shopping spree, our budget for next month will be firmly in the red. It is truly a gut-wrenching travesty for me to witness…”

I hand you the notebook. The last page is labelled _Devil’s Castle Accounts_. There is a line reading _Card payment: 40 000 yen; User: Dumbassihara_.

“Forty thousand…? What on earth did you buy, Dumbassihara?”

“Quit calling me that, man!”

That had better _not_ catch on!

“I know Ashiya’s pissed off’n all, but if I _didn’t_ buy it, you might’ve been in Ente Isla with Sariel right now! You could try thanking me a little, for a change!”

“…But it was Maou’s money, right?”

I approach Chiho and whisper in her ear.

“And what’s more, the money was for a hidden GPS transmitter he slipped into Emilia’s shoulder bag.”

“…That is _so_ creepy.”

“You guys are _so_ unfair! This is BS!”

“…But, regardless, we are now firmly in negative territory…so we’ve been forced to grudgingly accept Crestia’s attempt upon our lives via her dietary support…”

“You don’t have to wreck your health just to save some money! Please!”

I rap the notebook in my hand against the table.

“But we do! Now that we are unable to return home, bringing ourselves back into the black is my utmost priority!”

“What are you even doing here, Suzuno? How can you just sit here and relax inside enemy territory like this?!”

“I am here to fulfill the justice that must be done.”

I smile at you.

“I desire to slay the Devil King, of course. But, more than anything, I want to bring Emilia back and reform the rotten and corrupt Church organization. The Church must remain an icon of truth, a holy place that mankind can confidently place it’s faith upon. But, as you see, Emilia refuses to return until the Devil King is defeated, yes? So I thought I would weaken him and his generals as much as possible, to make it all the easier for Emilia to strike the final blow when she deems it proper.”

I take it you didn’t let her know it’s not working on you.

Why the hell _would_ I? I really don’t want to inspire her to get _more_ creative in her attempts to off us.

“Ugh! And you think Maou isn’t going to _do_ anything about you?!”

I wave my hands wildly as I speak.

“I’ll cook for Maou, all right?! You don’t have to worry about him Suzuno, so please, go find a job or something instead of hanging out _here_ all day!”

“I am afraid that proposition is a difficult one for me to swallow. This, right now, is my true calling. Now, when the Devil King is at his weakest, is the greatest chance we will ever have!”

“Are you being serious?! You can try and make excuses all you want, but you just want to have Maou eat you home-cooked food, don’t you?!”

“Hohh? Is that how you see this? Do you think the heart I placed in his bento box is a sign of my true love for Maou…”

That’s _generally_ what that would symbolize, yes.

“…rather than it’s trues origin as a symbol of the Holy Grail as it pervades and destroys the Devil King’s body?”

“I… What? No! No ‘true love’ at all! Please! You’re the one who thought osechi cuisine was standard bento-box food! Quit making all this junk up!”

“I do not understand what you mean.”

“Stop playing dumb! Come on, Maou! You don’t need to sit here and let your sworn foe try to kill you! I’ll have my mom teach me how to make all kinds of dishes!”

“Oh? Well, well! We must come visit your mother to pay our respects sometime, Sasaki!”

“Think it over carefully, Devil King. If you refuse my food now, I will forever cut off your supply!”

“What, is that your attempt at _threatening_ him or something?! Don’t listen to her, Maou! I’ll take _real_ good care of you, I promise!”

“…Man. Weird how it’s starting to look like they’re fighting over him, huh? It’s like he’s some hot-to-trot playboy or something.”

“Well, which is it? Chiho or me?”

“Whose food are you gonna eat?!”

“Please…just let me enjoy some breakfast, at least…”

Not gonna happen. I kick open the door to the Devil’s Castle.

Jeeezus!

“Luuuuciiiferrrrrr…”

I stomp into the room, grasping a small, box-like object.

I grimace upon seeing it and sidle up against the wall.

“What the hell were you thinking?! Hiding this inside my bag?!”

“That, uh… You know…”

“No, I _don’t_ know! Why did you put this in a woman’s bag?”

Because that woman wants to kill all of us?

“So you could find out where I was at all times, you stupid shut-in fallen angel?! You’re gonna pay for being such a goddamn creep all the time!!”

“Hey! Ashiya! Stop Emilia for me!”

7.

16.

“It is not my business to.”

“It kind of _is_ , dude! Whoa! Jeez, c’mon, Bell!”

7 again.

14.

“If Emilia would be kind enough to dispatch all of you at once, our work is done here.”

“You’re freaking me out, guys! Chiho Sasaki! Get Emilia away from me!”

6.

15.

“C’mon, Yusa! Go get him!”

“This is _so_ unfair! I hope you all go to hell!”

Why? It’s not _our_ fault you suck at diplomacy.

“Dude, Emilia, calm down! I can explain all of this!”

9.

19.

“No more excuses! Kill yourself now, before I do it for you!”

“This is _insane_!!”

Be thankful she didn’t get a twenty, you may have found yourself persuaded to take the advice.

The _hell_? You too?!

“Please…I’m begging you…let me eat in peace…”

That’s not likely to happen, peaceful meals make for boring roleplay, right?

Exactly.


End file.
